How to Balance School and Social Life

Co-authored by Katie Styzek

Last Updated: July 30, 2024 Fact Checked

When you’re in school, balancing your social life with the demands of your teachers can feel daunting. It feels like spending time socializing hurts your academic career and vice versa; you wish you just had more time. In truth, the real balance comes in being more efficient with the time you do have and better scheduling. You can achieve this by being more efficient when doing schoolwork, setting realistic goals and making your social life feel more fulfilling.

Part 1

Part 1 of 3:

Being More Efficient with Schoolwork

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Schedule your schoolwork. Whether it’s your nightly homework, a big project or an exam, it’s important to use a clear schedule to get it all done.^{[1]
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Expert Source

Katie Styzek
School Counselor

Expert Interview. 25 November 2020.} You’ll want to plan out your schoolwork throughout the week, as well as plan each day more specifically:
- Make sure that you prioritize your tasks according to their importance and due dates. For example, completing your homework for the following day would probably be at the top of your list, while working on a paper that is due a few days later would be next in line.
- Choose what classes you’ll work on during each day of the week. This helps you stay more focused within a particular field, and can help you retain information better.
- Use a day planner to set up a specific block of time daily for your schoolwork. This will help you build a habit and ensure you have plenty of time to get your work done. Schedule in some fun time as well to ensure that you get a break now and then.
- Consider when you do your best work as you schedule your schoolwork. For example, if you are not a morning person, then working on important tasks for classes might be better left for sometime in the afternoon or evening. Work when you're the most energized.^{[2]
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  Expert Source
  
  Colleen Campbell, PhD
  Career & Life Coach
  
  Expert Interview. 28 March 2019.}
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Use “if-then” planning to build good habits. This type of planning involves using a particular situation or time of day as a trigger for schoolwork. However, it is important to have deadlines for yourself as well because using “if-then” planning alone may lead to not finishing those tasks. If used properly, this kind of thinking is shown to build lasting habits.^{[3]
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Trustworthy Source

PubMed Central
Journal archive from the U.S. National Institutes of Health

Go to source} Examples of this kind of thinking include:
- ”If I’m on the bus, I’ll work on my math homework.”
- ”If I finish dinner, I’ll start studying for my next exam.”
- ”If it’s Friday night, I’ll start my homework for next Monday.”
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Carry your work around with you. As you go about your day, you might find that you have some spare time now and then when you could be working on school projects. Carry your schoolwork with you at all times so that you will always have the option of working on it.
- For example, you might be able to get 15 minutes of schoolwork in while waiting for a doctor’s appointment, or while riding on the bus.
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Avoid distractions, such as your cell phone or the internet. Not only does having your cell phone nearby mean your assignment takes longer to complete, but you’ll make more mistakes and retain less information. When you dedicate time to studying or homework, make sure to do the following:^{[4]
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- Turn off your cellphone.
- Turn off the TV.
- Find a quiet, isolated spot. People can distract you as well.
- Let friends and family know that you will be working on your schoolwork. It is okay to say “no” to invitations when you have schoolwork to do.
- Take regular breaks to recharge.^{[5]
  X
  Expert Source
  
  Colleen Campbell, PhD
  Career & Life Coach
  
  Expert Interview. 28 March 2019.}
- Stay off the internet, unless you need it for research. If you’re having difficulty staying on the right websites, you can use apps such as StayFocusd to block the distracting parts of the internet.^{[6]
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Talk to your teacher. If you’re still having trouble getting all your work done after doing your best to be more efficient, talk to your teacher about it. It’s possible they’re not aware of how heavy the workload they’re giving is, or they might be able to help you get through it more efficiently. It’s easy to think of your teacher as an adversary when they give you a lot of homework, but remember that they want to help you succeed. It’s important to frame your questions properly so your teacher understands you’re having difficulties rather than simply complaining:
- For instance, you could tell your teacher: ”I’ve spent several hours on my math homework and I feel I’m not getting as far as I should, can you help me work more efficiently?”
- If you’re having difficulty planning your work, you can ask: ”I’m having a hard time completing coursework for all my classes. Can you help me prioritize my work better?”
- For difficult exams, you can ask the following: ”Could you give me tips on getting through this material? I feel like studying for this exam is pretty daunting.”
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Look into other options for schoolwork help. Many schools provide a variety of different educational support resources, which may be available to you for free. You may also ask your parent about paid resources, such as a private tutor if your school does not offer the resources you need. Some resources your school might offer may include:
- Learning or writing centers
- Study groups
- One-on-one tutoring
- Study halls
- Academic advisors

Part 2

Part 2 of 3:

Setting and Achieving Realistic Goals

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When you decide to focus on your academic achievements, anything less than straight A’s can feel like a failure. Rather than trying to perfect your academic career right away, focus on smaller, incremental steps. For example, if your average in a particular class is 60%, don’t aim for 90% right away. Try to set goals that will incrementally take you to 90% in 5% portions. This will keep you working at your goals, rather than being demoralized.
If you’re committed to being a high achiever in school, you won’t be able to hang out the night before an important test. Understand that sacrifices have to be made if you aim to reach your goals.^{[7]
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Expert Source

Katie Styzek
School Counselor

Expert Interview. 25 November 2020.} Set aside a day each week particularly for socializing. Saturday is a particularly good choice: you can stay up later since it’s not a school night, and you don’t yet have to prepare your homework for the next week.
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Focus on the here and now. You’re likely to get overwhelmed if you start thinking about all the things you need to do while you’re trying to focus on a particular task.
- When you schedule time for studying or schoolwork, try to remain completely focused on what you’re doing. This will help you complete your work more efficiently and retain more information.
- When you’re spending time with friends and family, don’t start stressing about the test coming up next week or the homework you still have to do.
- Trust in your ability to schedule the things you need to do, and dedicate your attention to whatever you’re doing at the time.
Your family and friends can help you with balancing academics and leisure. Talk to them, making sure they know what your academic goals are. That way, they’ll understand when you can’t make plans with them or do all the chores they ask of you.^{[8]
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Research source} They’ll also be there to help you if you get a bad grade on a test or feel overwhelmed.

Part 3

Part 3 of 3:

Having a More Fulfilling Social Life

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1
Make time only for activities you want to participate in. There’s nothing wrong with going to a party or hanging out with friends, as long as you don’t feel forced into it. Don’t succumb to peer pressure because you want to fit in or be cool.
- Before you start trying to balance your social life with your academics, make sure the things that comprise your social life are activities you actually want to take part in.
- Focus on things that bring you enjoyment and a welcome distraction from your schoolwork. Try some new activities. For example, you could try signing up for a Zumba class, or take a watercolor painting class. You can try new activities with friends or on your own.
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Hang out with supportive friends. Make sure the people you allow in your life are supportive of your academic goals. If they make you feel guilty for not hanging out with them, they’re not being supportive of what you’re trying to achieve.
- Talk to them about your goals, focusing on finding a middle ground between the involvement they expect of you and your academic schedule.
- If they seem more focused on getting what they want and not helping you achieve your goals, you might have to start asking yourself if they’re a real friend.
- Try out some new activities to meet people who share your interests and who may also make supportive friends.
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Join a school club or organization. You might find that some of the clubs and organizations in your school have the kinds of activities you want to participate in. Joining a school club gives you the ability to spend time with like-minded students, building relationships that can help you during your academic career as well as giving you a needed social break.^{[9]
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Expert Source

Katie Styzek
School Counselor

Expert Interview. 25 November 2020.}Additionally, since club activities often follow a fixed schedule, it’ll be easier to fit them in around the schedule you’ve set for your schoolwork.
- If you want to stay in good health, you might want to join a sports team or a fitness-focused club.
- Clubs centered around artistic pursuits, such as sculpture or painting, can help you diversify your skillset while expressing yourself.
- Clubs focusing on math and the sciences can help you improve your skills in a way that’s directly useful for your schoolwork.
- Keep in mind that you can always start a club of your own if you can’t find a club that you want to join.
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Speak to a guidance counselor or academic advisor. While a teacher can help you with your schoolwork, a guidance counselor or academic advisor can help you with the overall balancing of your schoolwork and social life. They can serve as a good reference point for any questions you may have. Don’t hesitate to turn to them for help with all aspects of your academic and social life:
- Guidance counselors are usually trained to help you set academic goals, study more efficiently as well as helping you resolve conflicts with family and friends.
- Some guidance counselors also provide therapy and counseling services that can prove helpful as you straighten out your social life.^{[10]
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Common Questions: Balancing Your Studies and Social Life

How can you better yourself both academically and socially?

Find a study routine that works for you, and create a schedule to prioritize your tasks by importance.^{[11]
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Research source} Instead of mindlessly scrolling on your phone, make plans to do something fun with your friends, and stay on top of deadlines so you can enjoy social activities without feeling guilty or stressed.

How does social life affect students?

Building a strong social network can improve your self-esteem and communication skills. By learning how to express your ideas and listen to others, you’ll be able to manage your emotions more effectively—in and out of the classroom.^{[12]
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Do students need a social life?

Yes, studies show that students with strong social skills tend to perform better.^{[13]
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Trustworthy Source

PubMed Central
Journal archive from the U.S. National Institutes of Health

Go to source} When you’re surrounded by supportive people, you’re more likely to be productive and engaged. Connecting with others can also ease loneliness, relieve stress, and help you develop social skills that you’ll need in the workplace.

Tips

Forming a study group with your peers is a good way to get work done while socializing.^{[14]
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Expert Source

Katie Styzek
School Counselor

Expert Interview. 25 November 2020.}

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If you're feeling depressed, anxious, or like you lack energy all the time, it could be burnout from working too much.^{[15]
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Expert Source

Colleen Campbell, PhD
Career & Life Coach

Expert Interview. 28 March 2019.} Don't be afraid to talk to someone and prioritize relaxation and socializing for a while.

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Listening to music might help you focus while working, as well as making the time you spend studying seem to go by more quickly. Music without lyrics is typically best for this.

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