How to Be Funny and Energetic (Girls)

Co-authored by Donna Novak, Psy.D

Last Updated: December 6, 2024 References

We’ve all met people who seem to be always “on.” You know, that person who, every time you see them, is bursting with energy, and is always smiling and laughing. Most of us would like to be like that, too, but it doesn’t come naturally for everyone. If you aspire to be more funny and energetic, you can take steps to change your lifestyle and your habits in order to become the person you want to be.

Part 1

Part 1 of 3:

Being Funny and Energetic

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Be up for anything. When people ask you to go places and do things, go! People will find your up-for-anything attitude encouraging. If nobody has any ideas, then make your own suggestions about fun things to go and do.^{[1]
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- Try to suggest active, fun things, such as mini-golf or having a spontaneous picnic in the park. Making suggestions like staying in and watching a movie or playing video games doesn't demonstrate your energy.
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Try to stay positive. People who are seen as “energetic” are often smiling and happy. This doesn’t mean that they never have a bad day, but rather that they try to keep a positive attitude, and see the humor in a bad situation. When something gets you down, just remind yourself that things will all work out one way or another, so it's best to stay as positive as possible.
- When you talk to people, let this positive attitude spread. Try to remind people of the positive aspects of life. It’s not a bad idea to humor people when they are complaining about something bad that happened to them, but you can also try to help them see positive aspects of the situation.
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Break out of your comfort zone. It is easy to get into a routine where we do the same thing day-in and day-out. While this is easy and comfortable, it can also cause us to feel bored and stagnant. To be more energetic, try doing things that get you out of that comfort zone, and challenge you to something new. This will leave you feeling invigorated and excited about life.
- If you want to practice your ability to be funny, you could do something really challenging, like signing up for an open mic night at a local comedy club.
- Try a new physical activity. Maybe you’ve always wanted to try Jiu Jitsu or CrossFit, whatever it may be, don’t put it off anymore! You may find that you really enjoy it, and have a new hobby that helps you stay active. In the worst case, you will have tried it out and realized it’s not for you.
- Go to a social event to meet new people. Find a local event that interests you, and go by yourself. This is a great way to challenge and improve your social skills, and you will likely make a few new friends along the way.
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Don’t take yourself too seriously. If people sense that you are uptight and insecure, they can’t view you as an energetic and funny at the same time. Part of achieving this is realizing that it’s ok to be silly and goofy. Try to keep a happy, child-like disposition. Many people aspire to be like this, and if you are able to behave this way, people will be drawn to your energy.
- For example, don’t be afraid to dance around, make faces, or do silly voices (in appropriate situations). This will demonstrate that you don’t have any problem being silly and will encourage others to feel like they can be silly, too.
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Let your jokes reflect your personality. If you want to be seen as an energetic person, you probably won’t be telling dark, morbid jokes. Instead, you will probably want to tell jokes that are optimistic, and reflect your energetic and optimistic view of the world.^{[2]
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- Don’t tell jokes at the expense of other people in the room (or people who are known to the group, but may not be present). It is very difficult to do this without seeming petty and insecure.
- This doesn’t mean you can never tell a dark joke. However, remember that many people take your sense of humor as a reflection of who you are as a person, so try to balance the types of jokes you tell accordingly.
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Make eye contact. When you’re talking to people, try to maintain eye contact. This doesn’t mean you have to stare into their eyes and never look away. Rather, try maintaining eye contact most of the time, and glance away every now and then. If you stare at the ceiling or the ground while you’re talking to someone you will seem nervous and unconfident.^{[3]
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- This is important because part of portraying a funny and energetic personality requires confidence.
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Use hand gestures when you talk or tell a joke. If you just stand there when you’re talking without using any sort of hand gestures or body movements, you will seem unenthusiastic about what you’re saying. While you don’t want to over-gesticulate (e.g. use big hand gestures with every sentence) because this can be distracting, using some smaller hand gestures every few sentences will give your conversation some life.^{[4]
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- This will also help you keep your conversation flowing well. For many people, gesticulating helps keep you thinking of the next thing you want to say.
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Smile. The importance of smiling cannot be over-emphasized. If you smile, it is likely to encourage others to smile, too. You don’t need to smile every second of the day, but when you’re out and about, smiling will help brighten your mood, and the moods of others.^{[5]
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- Practice smiling in the mirror. You might feel silly doing this, but practicing a bit will help you flash your best smile.

Part 2

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Knowing When to Tone It Down

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Know when to tone it down, and when to liven things up. Sometimes the situation may call for a more low-key type of energy and humor, while other situations may really need someone to be very lively. Try to learn which situations call for what. Listen to the mood of what is going on around you. This will take some practice, but being aware of the feelings of others will help you learn.^{[6]
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- For example, a formal dinner party is not the time to be dancing around and telling jokes loudly. While you can still be energetic and lively, you can do it in a more subdued way, by laughing quietly and showing interest in the people around you with a smile on your face.
- If you are at an outdoor barbecue, you can probably be a bit more lively and energetic. Especially if there are kids around, who can match your intensity. People will see you and the children enjoying yourselves, and will probably want to join in the fun.
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Pay attention to the moods of those around you. Being emotionally intelligent means being able to perceive the emotions and mood states of those around you.^{[7]
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Research source} If you are going to be the funny and energetic person, then it is important that you can read the feelings of others so you don’t overdo it.
- If you have just met someone, you can help yourself identify how they are feeling at the moment by chatting with them about something neutral, like the weather. This will give you an idea of their baseline behavior. Then, after talking for a few minutes, try telling a funny joke, or do something silly. Watch carefully for their reaction. Do their eyes light up? Do they smile? Or do you notice a more negative reaction? Do they lower their eyebrows, or glance away nervously? If so, this person is probably not in the mood to be entertained by silliness and jokes, so stick to a more subdued tone.^{[8]
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Don’t try to compete. In some situations, you may find yourself in the presence of someone who is more energetic and funny than you could ever dream of being. In this case, there is little point in trying to be the funniest, most energetic person in the room. Instead, let this person take the lead, and simply enjoy being in their presence.^{[9]
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- If the person tells a really funny joke, any joke you tell is likely to seem like a dud. In this situation, it’s best just to be friendly and warm rather than trying to be the life of the party.
- If you do try to compete with this person, it will probably be obvious to the other people around you that you are trying very hard. It’s best to just let off.
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Don’t force it. There are some people who seem to never run out of funny things to say, and if you are one of those people, great! However, for most of us, we might think of something funny to say every now and then, and that’s fine. If you’re in a social situation, and you have something to say that you think is funny, then say it. If you don’t, don’t try to force it.^{[10]
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- If people are generally not laughing at the things you are saying, give it a rest. Don’t keep trying to force people into laughter. It will only make the situation uncomfortable. Remember that people are some times not in the right frame of mind for light-hearted jokes.

Part 3

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Changing Your Lifestyle

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Exercise. This may be a less obvious way to be more energetic and funny, but exercise is important for good health. If you feel fit and healthy, you will feel less sluggish and lazy. Find exercise that you enjoy, and mix it up if you start to get bored.^{[11]
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- For example, if you enjoy jogging, try to get outside and jog for 10-30 minutes each day. This will get your body up and moving, which will help you feel more lively.
- You could also try things like yoga, swimming, or team sports such as volleyball, soccer, or basketball.
- You could also consider hiring a personal trainer, who will not only help you get in shape, but push you to be more active in general.
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Change your diet. If you are the type who eats whatever is the most convenient (e.g. packaged foods, sugary sodas, and anything that doesn’t need to be prepared), consider changing up your diet. Switch to eating more fresh fruits and vegetables, and avoid processed food. Replace a few of those sodas with some water infused with fruit or tea.^{[12]
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- This will make you feel more energetic and more likely to want to be active and social. You may not notice a difference in the first few days of a major diet change, but if you stick with your healthier eating habits for a few weeks, you will definitely notice a difference.
- This doesn’t mean that you can’t enjoy a treat sometimes. On the contrary, if having ice cream with friends will make you feel happy and energetic, then by all means, do so. However, try to keep most of your eating habits on the healthier side of the spectrum.
If you aren’t getting enough sleep each night, it’s unlikely that you’re going to be feeling energetic, and probably not in the mood to be laughing and joking around either. Try to get at least 7 to 8 hours of sleep each night.^{[13]
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Accept yourself. You will not feel like being energetic or funny if you feel that you are not valued as a person. Therefore, it’s time to stop beating yourself up for not being the most popular, the best looking, the most outgoing, the tallest, the skinniest, etc. Whatever you are, make the best of it. ^{[14]
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- If you are able to accept yourself, people will notice your increased confidence, and be more drawn to you. This will encourage your energy and your willingness to come out of your shell.
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Surround yourself with supportive people. If you have friends or family in your life who bring you down, are constantly criticizing you, and spend most of their time complaining and being negative, distance yourself from these people. They will only bring you down. Instead, find people who bring out the best in you, and who encourage your energy.^{[15]
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- This doesn’t necessarily mean that you can only be friends with people who are very energetic and funny. Instead, it means that you should surround yourself with the people who make you feel your best. They may be quiet and shy, or they may be super outgoing. It doesn’t matter as long as they help you be you.
If you’re feeling low, try putting on your favorite dance music, and dance around if you want. Even if you just listen to the music, it will help brighten up your mood.^{[16]
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Tips

Don’t dwell on negative things that happen to you. It can be easy to get caught up analyzing every social situation and encounter you have, trying to figure out what you could have done better. Avoid this! Let things happen as they will, and enjoy the moment as much as you can.

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Warnings

You can’t make everyone like you. Just because someone didn’t like you much doesn’t mean that there is something wrong with you. Don’t spend your days trying to do this, or you will inevitably be disappointed and drained of your energy from so much effort.

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