How to Cope With Someone Copying You

Co-authored by Chloe Carmichael, PhD

Last Updated: April 8, 2024

Individuality is a precious thing and when you feel that yours is being taken away, you may feel threatened. People copy other people for a variety of reasons, and understanding why someone is copying you can help you deal with any insecurity or resentment. Whether you think it’s flattering or annoying, imitation has its place in developing who you are as an individual.

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Viewing Imitation as Flattery

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Consider why the person is copying you. Maybe they are copying you because they like your style, personality, or another aspect of yourself. Stay positive and look to lead by example rather than belittle or bemoan.^{[1]
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- Take into consideration that they may not even realize that they are mimicking you but is doing so out of a subconscious admiration.
- Examine your idols and mentors and whether or not you have incorporated any aspects of them being into who you are: how would you want them reacting to you if they knew you were looking up to them? Part of what gives celebrities their value is that they aren’t directly exposed to those they influence whereas you most likely will see the person who is copying you quite frequently.^{[2]
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Approach the topic subtly. Acknowledge that someone copying your style doesn’t make you less unique. By acknowledging what makes you unique, you accept that you are your own person and you can then impart the same sense of self-confidence to the person copying you.^{[3]
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- Compliment whatever you feel they are copying of yours especially if it is a different take than your own. For example, if you feel that they have been copying the way you wear sneakers with jeans, compliment them when they choose sandals. Realize that they may be extremely insecure and their self-esteem may be fragile or non-existent.^{[4]
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Consider changing your style or mannerisms. Focus on what you can change rather than what you can’t control. Adopting a new style can provide you with an opportunity to evaluate what matters to you and what truly composes your sense of style.
- Keep your preferences to yourself. If they are copying your style or mannerisms, try to change things up for a period of time. This will force them to look for other inspirations.^{[5]
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- Look to other style icons and deconstruct what elements you’d like to adopt as your own; better yet, have a discussion with the person about what style you think suits the both of you individually.
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Treat the person as you want to be treated. A person imitating someone else may be very insecure, so give them a boost of confidence by keeping positive.^{[6]
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Research source} With your help, she may eventually develop her own sense of style and self worth. Confidence can empower the both of you.
- Copying can be a developmental phase or a sign that a person is feeling empty.^{[7]
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  Research source} Recognize the power of friendship and communication.
- Enlist the aid of others within your common circle. Just because the person is copying you, doesn’t mean that you are alone in the situation. Including others can help the person find their own sense of self from gleaning from a larger sample size.
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Offer help to someone copying you at school or in the office. If someone is copying your work, chances are that they don't fully understand the instructions or their personal schedule has put them behind the deadline and they see you as a reliable source. Politely state that they should be doing their own work because both of you could get into trouble and, more importantly, they are not learning from the given assignment. We all have different aptitudes so be patient with others who have trouble learning something you find easy. ^{[8]
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- As the old adage goes, “give a man a fish and you’ll feed him for a day; teach a man to fish and you’ll feed him for a lifetime.” Rather than give someone complete access to your work, address the problem at its root and find out why they are copying your work. Whether it’s a problem in comprehension or scheduling, identifying why someone is copying your work will avoid any repeat infractions.

Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Communicating Your Disapproval

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Determine what bothers you about this person copying you. Be rational and analyze your own thoughts openly and honestly.^{[9]
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Expert Source

Chloe Carmichael, PhD
Licensed Clinical Psychologist

Expert Interview. 29 May 2019.} If it helps, try saying your thoughts aloud to a trusted friend or family member. Always sleep on your emotions for several days to ensure they are accurate and not irrational.
- When a friend copies your style, it can feel like they are violating your friendship by taking your self-expression.^{[10]
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- If you're experiencing being copied at work or school, perhaps it makes you feel threatened and unappreciated if someone else is taking credit for your personal projects and work ethic. Recognizing how you feel will help you tailor a solution to the problem.
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Organize your thoughts and plan to communicate rather than argue. Writing down what you want to say allows you to construct a coherent and rational argument. Plan what you want the outcome to be and build your strategy towards this outcome. It may also be helpful to keep a journal or write yourself an email each time you experience any negative emotions towards being copied
- Begin with a flow chart or brainstorm your thoughts and emotions.
- Anticipate what emotions this conversation might stir up and utilize your support network to help you work through these emotions.^{[11]
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  Expert Source
  
  Chloe Carmichael, PhD
  Licensed Clinical Psychologist
  
  Expert Interview. 29 May 2019.} For example, talk to family and friends if confronting other close people in your network or talk to other coworkers if your confrontation is taking place at the workplace.
- Practice and rehearse what you will say. Whether you talk in front of a mirror or go over your talking points with your family, get comfortable speaking about this issue and being in this scenario.
3
Confront the person who is copying you. Mention how their actions have negatively affected you and what actions need to take place in order to rectify the situation. Make sure to choose your words carefully and not to escalate the emotions with an angry or elevated tone. Someone who is bluntly mimicking someone else may be sensitive and insecure making them prone to defensiveness when confronted.
- Say something similar to, “I noticed that you have been wearing very similar outfits to what I have been wearing. You have even bought the exact same shoes and accessories. I can appreciate if you like my fashion sense but shopping lets us express ourselves. Are you aware of what you’re doing?”^{[12]
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- Remember people who copy others often have low self-esteem and may be in denial or become defensive.^{[13]
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- If their imitation is taking place at work, be professional and courteous so as to ensure your professional status. Make sure not to burn bridges with coworkers by consulting the human resources department to ensure the most professional approach possible based on the company’s standards and policies.
- Take a deep breath before and during the confrontation. Keep calm when delivering news that the person may see as accusatory. Open body language and a friendly demeanor can help defuse their defensiveness.
4
If they continue to copy you even after you have confronted them, avoid them. Don’t use up valuable emotional and mental resources by dwelling on what you can’t control. Removing yourself from the situation takes a proactive approach in dealing with someone copying you: out of sight, out of mind.
- If it is impossible to completely avoid this person, treat the entire situation as a joke and don’t spend any more time trying to change it. Finding the humor in the situation can help you deal with any stress or aggravation.

Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Preventing Someone From Copying Intellectual Property

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1
Seek out trademarks, copyrights, or patents. Trademarks relate to businesses and branding. Protect your invention or discovery with a patent. Get copyrights to written works, creative projects and computer programs. Depending on where you live, there are specific procedures you must take in order to achieve each so it’s best to consult a professional.
- Getting a trademark does not fully protect you as trademarks may only be good within a certain jurisdiction.
- Creativity is a mysterious thing and often a difficult area to prove ownership. In America, a copyright is grounded in the US constitution; therefore, do your due diligence if working internationally.
- Depending on your contribution, you may be awarded different levels of a copyright if working collaboratively.
- The US Patent and Trademark Office manages trademarks and patents domestically but can also be the basis where international trademarks are registered.
- Registering with the US Customs may help stop the import of goods that infringe your patent or trademark.
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Create a strong brand. When done right, branding can create strong customer loyalty and add to the value of your business. Quality, uniqueness, and strong values are always at the forefront of creating a strong brand.
- Even if you’re a small start-up, you can use the example of large corporations like Nike and Apple who have become synonymous with branding and decode what has worked.
- Establishing a connection with your customers through strong customer service builds brand loyalty.
- Constant innovation keeps you ahead of competitors and revered by your peers and consumer base alike.
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Feed your ego and take pride in the fact that someone wants to copy you. The fact that someone wants to duplicate something of yours means that you have affected them in a profound way. Cultural luminaries change society one person at a time. Picture yourself in the fledgling stages of positive change.
- Be more prolific so that you don’t have to worry about single pieces of work being copied but rather maintaining the quality of the body of your work as a whole.

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Due your due diligence and seek professional help when dealing with trademarks, copyrights, and patents.

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Have self confidence and ignore what others are saying about you or the situation.

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Emotions are complex so understanding why we react the way we do and what actions to take in order to feel whole may take the help of a professional without a set timetable.^{[14]
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Expert Source

Chloe Carmichael, PhD
Licensed Clinical Psychologist

Expert Interview. 29 May 2019.}

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