How to Deal With Teachers That Hate Your Guts

Co-authored by Alexander Ruiz, M.Ed.

Last Updated: December 10, 2024

School can be difficult if you have a teacher that seems to hate you. Oftentimes, teachers don't actually hate you, but have unresolved issues with you that need to be fixed. If you're willing to change your behavior, have honest discussions with your teacher, and apply yourself in school, your relationship with your teacher will begin to improve.

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Resolving Existing Issues With Your Teacher

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Do you talk back to your teacher? Do you distract your other classmates? Are you constantly talking during class or interrupting other students?^{[1]
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Research source} Do you distract the teacher from teaching or get up at random times? You should evaluate your own behavior to figure out why your teacher seems to dislike you. If you realize that your actions are making your teacher dislike you, then it's time to make some changes in your behavior.
2
Ask your teacher why they seem to dislike you. If you are unsure why your teacher doesn't like you, ask them to have a private conversation with you. Don't actually ask "Why do you hate me?" Instead, you should express to your teacher that you'd like to do well in their class, and ask them what you can do to improve as a student.^{[2]
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Research source} Prove to your teacher that you're a serious student and that you respect them. This may lead to your teacher respecting you back.
- A few phrases you can say are:
  - "Passing this class is important to me, and I'd like to know what changes I need to make in order to make that happen."
  - "I'd really like to improve my relationship with you because I feel like I can learn a lot from you and this class. Please let me know what I can do to make that happen."
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A genuine apology will go a long way with your teacher. When you apologize, you need to do two things. First of all, you need to acknowledge your wrongdoings and the negative impact that your actions have caused. Secondly, you need to show remorse for your actions. You must be genuine with your apology, and make a conscious effort to not make the same mistakes going forward.^{[3]
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If you're feeling bullied, scared, or hurt by your teacher, it is important that you talk to the principal or to your parents. It is never okay for a teacher to bully a student, so you should seek help if you can't fix your relationship with your teacher on your own.^{[4]
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Research source} If you believe your teacher is being inappropriate, talk to someone about it immediately.

Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Being a Good Student

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Be aware of your behavior because good students never cause disruptions or distractions during class. Don't talk to other students while class is in session, don't interrupt your fellow students or your teacher while they are talking, don't use your cellphone in class, don't curse or talk back to your teacher, and don't speak without raising your hand.
If your teacher can tell that you are not putting any effort into your homework or class assignments, they won't be very impressed with you.^{[5]
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Research source} Teachers like students who study for tests, turn in their homework assignments and participate in group projects. If you're having trouble with your schoolwork, approach your teacher and ask them for help. If your teacher sees that you're trying, they'll usually appreciate your effort.
Teachers appreciate students who genuinely enjoy learning and helping in the classroom. Always volunteer during class, offer to arrive early or stay late to help prepare a lesson or clean up the classroom, and ask your teacher if there are any extracurricular activities for you to get involved in. If you improve as a student, your relationship with your teacher should improve as well.

Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Building a Relationship With Your Teacher

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You might see your teacher as only being a teacher, but keep in mind that they have a life of their own. Your teacher may be going through problems in their personal life, be stressed out from bad students, or be tired from working so much. Don't be too hard on your teacher and remember that they are a person too. Ask your teacher about their weekend, or what their favorite movies are. They'll appreciate you making an effort to learn more about them.^{[6]
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You and your teacher don't have to be best friends, but you should be able to work together in a stress-free environment. Don't be a nuisance or give your teacher a hard time, and they'll most likely stop giving you a hard time. If you focus on your schoolwork and treat your teacher with respect, they should have no reason to dislike you.
If your teacher seems to dislike you, it may be difficult for you to treat them with respect. However, if you're able to be respectful with your teacher while discussing schoolwork or personal issues, they may start to develop a mutual respect for you.^{[7]
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Research source} When issues arise in the future, talk to your teacher respectfully, and in private, to hopefully resolve the issue.

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What do you do if your teacher smacks you?

Andy Winder

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If your teacher hits you or assaults you in any way, they have committed physical abuse. Let your counselor, school administrator, or other trusted adult know immediately. They can help you get out of the situation and prevent the teacher from abusing others in the future.

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What if your teacher is not helping you when you get bullied and they clearly see that you are being bullied?

Andy Winder

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Bullying is a serious issue. If your teacher does not step in to help, talk to your legal guardian, your counselor, or a school administrator immediately.

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My teacher is a really reasonable person, but I have done some disrespectful things. Now I feel like he dislikes me. What should I do?

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I went through the same things when I was in high school. I wasn't necessarily a bad student, but I would talk during class. The best thing to do is to stop acting disrespectfully, and show him that you care about the class and want to succeed. If he still is prejudiced against you, try approaching him in a respectful manner and say that you want to do well and inquire what you can do to get better.

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Tips

Always talk to a trusted adult if you feel like you're being targeted by a teacher.

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I have a few teachers who I dislike very much, and one of them is just rude. However, as long as you are a good student and do what you have to do, there's no need to worry about them. Their attitude is their problem!

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