This article was co-authored by Sarah Schewitz, PsyD and by wikiHow staff writer, Jennifer Mueller, JD. Sarah Schewitz, Psy.D. is a licensed clinical psychologist by the California Board of Psychology with over 10 years of experience. She received her Psy.D. from the Florida Institute of Technology in 2011. She is the founder of Couples Learn, an online psychology practice helping couples and individuals improve and change their patterns in love and relationships.
There are 12 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
This article has been fact-checked, ensuring the accuracy of any cited facts and confirming the authority of its sources.
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Whether they're a friend, family member, coworker, or romantic partner, dealing with someone who's insecure can be exhausting. But if you treat them with kindness and respect, they'll become more trusting of you and might even rebuild their self-confidence. Read on for practical suggestions to make your relationship with an insecure person more relaxing and enjoyable.
Things You Should Know
- Talk to the person to find out the core issue that's causing their insecurity and you'll both be able to handle it better.
- Establish clear boundaries about what's acceptable to talk about and what you're willing to do for the person if they need constant reassurance.
- Listen actively when they talk and give them plenty of time to express their thoughts and feelings so they understand that their words matter.
Steps
Expert Q&A
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QuestionHow should I respond to someone who feels insecure?Lisa ShieldLisa Shield is a love and relationship expert based in Los Angeles. She has a Master's degree in Spiritual Psychology and is a certified life and relationship coach with over 17 years of experience. Lisa has been featured in The Huffington Post, Buzzfeed, LA Times, and Cosmopolitan.
Dating CoachIt's okay to set boundaries if you don't feel like you can help effectively. Just let the person know that you're not sure if you can help them and that they may need to talk to another person about it.
Video
Tips
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The more time you're able to spend one-on-one with the person, the better chance you'll have of finding out what's causing their insecurity and helping them feel more comfortable around you.Thanks
References
- ↑ https://www.montana.edu/oha/blog/mind_blogs/how-to-help-friend-struggling-with-body-image.html
- ↑ https://www.montana.edu/oha/blog/mind_blogs/how-to-help-friend-struggling-with-body-image.html
- ↑ https://caps.umich.edu/content/helping-someone-self-esteem
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/body-language
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-mindful-self-express/201512/the-3-most-common-causes-insecurity-and-how-beat-them
- ↑ https://caps.umich.edu/content/helping-someone-self-esteem
- ↑ https://caps.umich.edu/content/helping-someone-self-esteem
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/having-sex-wanting-intimacy/202012/4-ways-overcome-insecurity-in-romantic-relationships
- ↑ Lisa Shield. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 13 December 2018.
- ↑ https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-023-32034-4
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-empaths-survival-guide/201810/self-soothing-strategies-8-ways-to-calm-anxiety-and-stress
- ↑ https://www.urmc.rochester.edu/behavioral-health-partners/bhp-blog/april-2018/5-4-3-2-1-coping-technique-for-anxiety.aspx
- ↑ https://www.montana.edu/oha/blog/mind_blogs/how-to-help-friend-struggling-with-body-image.html
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201711/7-ways-insecure-people-try-seem-important
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/working-with-difficult-people/202202/how-to-handle-a-jealous-coworker
- ↑ https://health.clevelandclinic.org/how-to-deal-with-jealousy/
- ↑ https://www.montana.edu/oha/blog/mind_blogs/how-to-help-friend-struggling-with-body-image.html
About This Article
To interact with an insecure person, create boundaries and protect yourself from hurtful behavior. This will help you engage with the person in a sympathetic and supportive way. Show them you're listening and that you value their input. You can also encourage them to develop a positive mindset so they believe in themselves. This can do a lot toward boosting their self-esteem and improving your relationship with them. For more tips from our co-author, including how to help someone improve their self-esteem, read on!
Reader Success Stories
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"Tips for me to see what I should do, either stay or move on."