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Creatively insulting someone is one way of delivering a quick comeback that settles a score or puts someone back in their place. Whether it's someone who uses insults constantly or is someone who doesn't know where to draw the line on making fun of you, a creative insult can stop the annoying behavior in its tracks.

Part 1
Part 1 of 4:

Keeping Your Calm

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  1. If you insult someone without taking a moment to gather your wits, you'll probably just be plain defensive or come across as confused.[1] When you insult them, take a small amount of time to think about it. Not too much or they'll catch on, but a long pause is just fine. If you're short on ideas use a previous insult and modify it. Chances are, they won't catch it.
    • Take a few deep breaths (draw your breath in noisily if it helps) concentrate on what needs to be said and draw on your pre-rehearsed comebacks (see step 2).
  2. Think up appropriate ways to insult the different people who might insult you. If you have a starting point, the rest will come easier.
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  3. If you don't take their insults seriously, they won't be able to insult you seriously.
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Part 2
Part 2 of 4:

Being Cool

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  1. Instead, just smile and laugh it off. It will make the person wonder what they're doing wrong.
  2. or any other variants such as "That's what she said!" You can use "your mom" jokes to make them be quiet when they are coming up with a comeback to stop them, but they're not creative and people have become used to ignoring them.[2]
  3. If you have a point of pride, and they tried to hit it, realize that it is because of their insecurities. If you then talk about how their insult would apply to them more than you, they are removed of this crucial power and you have pointed out that which is evident––they're projecting their insecurities onto you.
  4. Find their points of pride and insult them on it. If they come up with a comeback, chuckle a bit then say, "It's a bit too late for sarcasm, but thank you." You must remain grounded in your apparent idea that they were complimenting you, they won't believe it, but it will make it harder for them to insult you effectively.[3]
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Part 4
Part 4 of 4:

Using the Other Person's Frustration

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  1. If you stop them from insulting you, they will get frustrated and try harder. If so, interrupt them and pick apart their insults.
  2. If they are frustrated, you have essentially won.[4] Frustration is the equivalent of an armbar in martial arts, you haven't won yet, but you're about to. This point is critical. You have the choice to either apologize at this point or continue and send them into a swearing or crying wreck. You need to feel when they're frustrated.
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Community Q&A

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  • Question
    If someone is irritating me with a rumor, what should I do?
    Community Answer
    Community Answer
    Laugh at the rumor and add little more to it...add enough that people finally realize the whole story is fake.
  • Question
    My grandson likes to eat pizza with ketchup on it, and his mean stepdad makes him feel horrible about it - what is a good comeback?
    Community Answer
    Community Answer
    "No wonder my grandson doesn't like you. Stop focusing on the small things that don't matter and start acting like a father/fatherly figure/role model." People like what they like! It's petty and nasty to put them down for that.
  • Question
    I have an enemy who used to be my good friend, but she betrayed me in front of our teacher. How do I insult her by which she gets to know that whatever she has done to me was seriously wrong?
    Community Answer
    Community Answer
    If she used to be your good friend, perhaps you know some of her deep dark secrets or something like that. Bring it up, and she'll realize that she can't act like your friendship never happened.
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Tips

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Tips from our Readers

  • When they insult you, jump in partway through to interrupt them by breaking their insult down bit by bit. Not letting them complete their slam is frustrating for them, signaling you've got the upper hand.
  • Laugh off their harsh comments, which helps diminish their impact, instead of getting upset yourself. Keeping a cool head prevents things from escalating further.
  • If you notice holes in their insult logic, call that out to mock them over it. Poking fun at their weak argument diminishes their power while building up yours.
  • Prepare some standard comebacks ahead of time you can use when someone insults you. Having them ready makes it much easier to snap back quickly at the moment.
  • Politely ask for clarification if you need some quick extra time to think up a creative comeback insult. It buys you a few seconds without looking obvious.
  • View it as a win when they get visibly annoyed because you've flustered them. Stay gracious at that point instead of piling on extra insults unnecessarily.
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Warnings

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Things You'll Need

  • A quick wit that can be honed at most libraries.
  • A firm center, which comes with self-knowing, and knowing where your insecurities lie. Come at the person with confidence.


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About This Article

Seth Hall
Co-authored by:
Life Coach
This article was co-authored by Seth Hall. Seth T. Hall (ICF ACC, CLC, and MNLP) is a Certified Life Coach and Founder of Transformational Solutions, a Los Angeles-based life-coaching company that helps people achieve their toughest goals, find their own voice, and think outside the box. He has been a life coach for over 10 years, specializing in personal development, relationships, career and finance, and wellness. He has helped his clients break the negative cycles in their lives and replace them with a positive, proactive mindset. Seth believes that everyone has the potential to live a fulfilling and rewarding life, and works passionately to help them reach their full potential. With a deep understanding of how our minds work and the power of positive thinking, he encourages his clients to find their unique paths in life and find success on their own terms. He is a certified master practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming, a featured co-author for WikiHow, and co-author of "The Mountain Method”, “The Happy Tiger”, and “The V.I.S.I.O.N.S. Program”. This article has been viewed 240,428 times.
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Co-authors: 38
Updated: October 5, 2024
Views: 240,428
Article SummaryX

Insulting somebody creatively is a great way to get some laughs and put someone in their place when they get cocky. Think about things that are important to the person. For example, if they’re always talking about their football team, say something like, “I know, Sam. I get it. I’d be sore too if my team lost 3 games in a row.” Or, if they insult you for being bad at a sport, turn it back on them by saying, “I could improve my game if I wanted to, but you’re stuck with your face for life.” You can also prepare some quick-fire comebacks that work in any situation like, “If I agreed with you, we’d both be wrong.” For more tips, including how to stay calm when trading insults, read on!

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