What Kind of Reality Check Do I Need Quiz
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QuestionHow do I motivate myself to stand up if I'm not an assertive person?
Guy ReichardGuy Reichard is an Executive Life Coach and the Founder of HeartRich Coaching & Training, a professional life coaching and inner leadership training provider based in Toronto, Ontario, Canada. He works with people to create more meaning, purpose, well-being, and fulfillment in their lives. Guy has over 10 years of personal growth coaching and resilience training experience, helping clients enhance and transform their inner worlds, so they can be a more positive and powerful influence on those they love and lead. He is an Adler Certified Professional Coach (ACPC), and is accredited by the International Coach Federation. He earned a BA in Psychology from York University in 1997 and a Master of Business Administration (MBA) from York University in 2000.
Executive Life CoachIt's better to look focus on your strengths than it is to worry over your weaknesses. I would suggest digging deep inside to try and figure out where your strengths lie. -
QuestionWhy is it so hard for me to stand up for myself?Guy ReichardGuy Reichard is an Executive Life Coach and the Founder of HeartRich Coaching & Training, a professional life coaching and inner leadership training provider based in Toronto, Ontario, Canada. He works with people to create more meaning, purpose, well-being, and fulfillment in their lives. Guy has over 10 years of personal growth coaching and resilience training experience, helping clients enhance and transform their inner worlds, so they can be a more positive and powerful influence on those they love and lead. He is an Adler Certified Professional Coach (ACPC), and is accredited by the International Coach Federation. He earned a BA in Psychology from York University in 1997 and a Master of Business Administration (MBA) from York University in 2000.
Executive Life CoachIt's hard to push yourself to do something if you don't think you can pull it off. It's difficult to be confident if you've never done something before, so try not to put too much stock in this. The more often you stand up for yourself, the easier it will be. -
QuestionAny advice on how to not care about what others think?
Community AnswerTell yourself that you are the only one who can control who you are. No one else has any power over you. You can defeat them, no matter what they say. See further: How to Not Care What People Think. -
QuestionHow do I keep my self confidence up?
Community AnswerHave a strong soul. Don't let words affect you. Keep thinking there is something to look forward to in the future. -
QuestionWhat can I do to fill the space of a close friend that turned out to be a traitor?
Community AnswerIf you feel lonely, remind yourself that they don't deserve to be friends with you because they betrayed you. You will make plenty more friends in time, don't worry. -
QuestionWhat are some ways I can practice standing up for myself?
Community AnswerRun through drills with a close friend or family member. Come up with scenarios where you are forced to stand up for yourself. Think through what you will say, and then say it. Be assertive in the simulation, and then carry these skills over into real life.
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QuestionWhat are the signs that you are a people pleaser?
Community AnswerThere are various signs but most of all, resentment resides within you because you're always pleasing other people at the expense of your own needs. Some indicators include wanting to say no but always saying yes, complimenting when you don't actually believe what you're saying and going to places or doing things when you'd rather be doing anything else in the world but that. See further: How to Stop Being a People Pleaser.
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QuestionHow do I stand up to an old crush who does not respect me?
Community AnswerI have had to deal with this very thing today. I waited after receiving an indecent text message until I was thinking clearly, then texted back that I would expect an apology as I was insulted. He texted back that it was just a joke and that I should settle down. In other words, he dismissed my feelings and in so doing further disrespected me. I thought for an hour and then texted back, "So, it would be funny if your daughter received a message like that?" You can substitute sister, mother, etc.
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QuestionHow do I stand up for myself without being mean?
Community AnswerStay positive. You don't need to bring others down to lift yourself up. Just explain the situation (why you feel like you are not being treated fairly, etc.) and politely ask the person to stop the behavior.
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QuestionHow can I stand up for myself when my friend is embarrassing me?
Community AnswerThe best thing to do is to confront her in private and tell her how you feel. Maybe she's not doing it intentionally.
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QuestionHow do I show I have a big heart?
Community AnswerGo out of your way to make someone's day better (cook breakfast for them, take them to work, etc.). Also, find a cause or charity that you like and donate some of your money. Or volunteer some of your time to community service.
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QuestionWhat if I stand up for myself and the person says something like, "Why are you so mad? What did I do?"
Community AnswerSay, "I am standing up for myself, I'm not mad, but I don't like it when you (name what that person was doing before you stopped them), so can you please stop doing that?" -
QuestionWhat should I do if my friend is being extremely obsessed and paranoid about me?
Community AnswerStand up for yourself by calling your friend out on her behavior and seeking a new friend if she doesn't stop.
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QuestionHow do I deal with a coworker who I have to work with, who clearly dislikes me and is overly friendly to others in front of me?
Community AnswerIgnore and detach from the person. It may be uncomfortable, but try not to show a reaction. Just be professional, respectful and mature and focus on your work. Don't seek validation from this person for your worth or value or spend energy trying to get them to like you. Strengthen your relationships with your boss and others in the office. This will be helpful if this person turns out to be untrustworthy in his/her intentions toward you.
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QuestionI don't like how my friend acts most of the time, but I'm afraid she might feel hurt if I tell her that. What should I do?
Fleurchild1Community AnswerYou'll have to tell your friend in a calm manner. She may get upset but try to discuss it as peacefully as you can and be clear about what you don't like and why you don't like it. Affirm that you still like HER, but explain that her actions are sometimes difficult to accept or support. Listen to her replies and try to work out a peaceful solution. -
QuestionWhat if you tried everything and it hasn't worked?
Chris WaltersCommunity AnswerIf you have literally tried everything you could possibly think of, then remember when push comes to shove don't back down. Some people will love to push you as far as they think you'll go, so that they still "win". If they want to throw down, don't be afraid to defend yourself and not back down from it. If you back down from a possible fight then you're showing them your limits. The true answer to your question would be "How far are you willing to go to prove that you're going to stand up for yourself?" -
QuestionWhat should I do when someone apologizes for something that hurt me badly? If I forgive them, does that mean I'm not standing up for myself?
Community AnswerIt takes infinitely more strength to forgive someone for what they have done to you than it does to hold a grudge against them. If you hold onto anger and resentment, you're only hurting yourself. If they ask for forgiveness and they are truly remorseful, you should forgive them, but remain cautious until they have truly earned back your trust.
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QuestionWhat do I do if people are mocking me and in front of a big crowd, and the people around me are having a laugh. How should I defend myself?
Fleurchild1Community AnswerThe best thing to do is to stay calm and ignore them. If you scream or overreact, they will laugh and mock you even more, but when they see that you don't care, they'll gradually learn to leave you alone. If they get violent, defend yourself in a calm manner. Let your general disposition be that you don't care.
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QuestionWhat if I can't stay away from negative people because I live with them? I always back down when I'm trying to stand up to someone, too.
Bella & DoraCommunity AnswerIt is reasonable that you do not wanna be around such people. Try talking to them about it and try to help them, too. Be strong and never back down. -
QuestionA group of guys bother me often. As a female, I feel intimidated. What can I do?
Community AnswerTell them how you feel, ignore them or walk away. If it continues, contact a teacher if you are in school or the police if you are not. You do not have to feel intimidated.
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QuestionHow do I find the right thing to say when people are putting me down?
Community AnswerYou can just say you too, because that is always the easiest thing to say cause it won't hurt them that much, also use that whenever you don't have a comeback, and if they are really hurting you, then say whatever is on your mind, then they will stop. Or you can ignore them, even though that is the hardest thing to do. For example, if they are saying "Oh you suck" then say "How about you?" then they will think about it and if they don't have any more comebacks, the right thing to do would be just walk away.
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QuestionHow can I truly figure out what past situation is keeping me from standing up for myself?
Community AnswerIt's tough to know when you are stressed out and in middle of all that. But your mind (and heart) is very intelligent, you can see patterns in incidents happening to you. If you are repeatedly ending up with the same feelings with different people, when you are in the heat of it you might find yourself going back to a past situation when you felt the same. That's your cue.
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QuestionHow do I deal with a classmate that is very bad?
LaKayla FloodCommunity AnswerJust ignore them all they want is attention from you or someone else. So just keep paying attention to the teacher and not that classmate.
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QuestionWhat can I do if someone mean is annoying me?
Community AnswerStay calm. Try saying something like "Could you please stop doing that? I don't really like that." If they are older than you and they persist, feel free to report or reply to them with something of the same harshness. If they are the same age, just ask them politely to stop trying so hard to annoy you, because it isn't working (Even if they are driving you up the wall).
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QuestionHow would I stop a rumor?
Community AnswerUnfortunately, there's no real way to stop a rumor, especially if enough people know about it. You can, however, address it with an attitude that shows it doesn't bother you, or you could just ignore it. Eventually, the people will move on to another topic and forget about it.
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QuestionWhat if standing up for myself doesn't work?
Community AnswerDon’t give up. It may not work the first time, but when you do it multiple times, eventually the bullies will realize that you are strong and capable. Never give up.
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QuestionHow do I stand up for myself if I feel like I am fat and have no confidence?
Community AnswerConfidence comes from within you. It doesn't matter what you look like, you're a person of value. Focus on your strengths, not what you perceive as your weaknesses. Love yourself. Write down everything you like about yourself and re-read the list every day. Keep adding to it. You won't gain confidence overnight, it's a process, but you'll get there.
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QuestionHow do I stand up for myself if my spouse is abusing me?
Community AnswerYou can seek professional advice at a domestic shelter. You can find information on these programs online, including phone numbers and contact information, and they will be able to provide you with any assistance that you might need to get out of an abusive situation.
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QuestionWhat should I say if one of my family members says that I am too fat to have someone to fall in love with me?
Community AnswerRemind them that not everyone in the world is as shallow as them, and plenty of people would be more than capable of loving someone who was overweight.
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QuestionI have birthmark on my leg and I feel self conscious about it. How can I become comfortable letting people see it?
Community AnswerThere is nothing embarrassing about birthmarks. If someone is looking at it, just ask the person what he/she thinks it looks like. Make up a story for it. It can be a fun conversation starter. Your birthmark makes you unique!
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