How to Achieve the Soft Boy Aesthetic: Outfits, Hairstyles, & More

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Everything you need to start dressing like a soft boy

Co-authored by Glenn Carreau Reviewed by Melissa Young

Last Updated: July 15, 2024 Fact Checked

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What is the soft boy aesthetic?

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Clothing & Outfit Ideas

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Grooming Techniques

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Common Traits

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Soft Boy Aesthetic History

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Related Aesthetics

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Are you interested in switching up your style and adopting the “soft boy” look? A “soft boy” is typically a guy with emotional depth who’s unafraid to express his more gentle or feminine side. Thus, the soft boy style evokes openness and charm with lots of oversized tops, straight-legged pants, and muted or pastel colors paired with more neutral, earthy shades. Read on for a complete guide to the soft boy aesthetic, complete with fashion and grooming tips to help you master the look yourself!

Understanding the Soft Boy Aesthetic

The soft boy aesthetic comes from the idea of “soft” men who are tender and emotionally open (as opposed to “macho”). The style is defined by oversized sweaters and t-shirts, outfits with a cool and relaxed vibe, and earthy or neutral shades accented by muted colors and pastels.

Section 1 of 6:

What is the soft boy aesthetic?

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The soft boy aesthetic is a style for men with a sensitive, artistic side. In terms of clothing and grooming, the soft boy look is open and approachable yet cool and confident, with a vintage feel, oversized sweaters and shirts, and lots of muted, gentle colors and neutral shades. However, “soft boy” is more than a style; it’s also a persona that has developed in recent years.
- Characteristically, soft boys are intellectual, artistic, and emotionally intelligent, with a clothing style designed to suit their sweet-natured and caring personalities.
- The soft boy aesthetic sometimes conjures a “boy next door” vibe—gentle, welcoming, and vulnerable rather than tough, guarded, and uncommunicative.

Section 2 of 6:

Soft Boy Clothing & Outfit Ideas

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Tops First, oversized sweatshirts are a must-have! Look for sweaters with light, gentle colors like beige, cream, faded blue, or pastel pink. Next, stock up on graphic t-shirts, baggy, oversized t-shirts, and slightly oversized overshirts you can pair with them. Layering is a key part of the soft boy aesthetic, and anything with a vintage look is perfect.^{[1]
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- Don’t wear anything too structured or tight-fitting; the soft boy style is all about being cozy and wearing relaxed clothes you can feel comfy in.
- Aim to wear earthy or neutral-toned overshirts. You could even go for a few loose-fitting linen shirts, as well!
- Try to look for unique designs, if possible. Even if you can’t find unique pieces, you can add patches to your tops later—or even embroider them yourself.
- Choose graphic t-shirts that relate to your interests, regardless of whether they're vintage or modern. Soft boys are open about their passions, so don’t be afraid to show off yours through fashion!
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Outerwear In terms of outerwear, hoodies and cardigans can keep you warm while still capturing the soft boy aesthetic. Additionally, Harrington jackets (along with any jacket that has a vintage vibe) are a perfect choice for soft boy outerwear. Choose neutral colors for most of your outerwear—or, if you find a comfy pastel sweater or jacket, you could wear that as well!
- Hoodies, cardigans, and Harrington jackets all look great when layered and add some depth to your overall look.
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Bottoms Straight-leg jeans, straight-leg trousers (including chinos and pleated pants), and baggy pants are a soft boy aesthetic staple. Opt for jeans with a relaxed fit and a lighter wash—and lighter trousers, like pastel, tan, or white. Wear checkered or pinstriped trousers if you want to make your outfits a little bolder. Try loose shorts in light, muted, and pastel shades in warmer weather.^{[2]
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- Want to make an extra statement with your jeans? Try folding them at the hem once or twice.
A variety of shoe types work with the soft boy aesthetic, including chunky sneakers (like Air Force 1s), Converse, Vans, and Doc Martens. If you’re not in the mood for a chunky sneaker-like shoe, you could opt for loafers or slip-ons. The ideal soft boy shoe looks fashionable and has a relaxed, laid-back vibe.^{[3]
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Accessories A few accessories can be the cherry on top of the ice cream for a soft boy look. If you enjoy hats, beanies and bucket hats are the way to go. In terms of jewelry, try things like chains, layered necklaces, rings, and bracelets. If you need a bag to carry things around, opt for a crossbody bag, messenger bag, or belt bag.^{[4]
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- Hats: If you wear a beanie, neutral shades (like black, brown, beige, and gray) are ideal. However, if you’re wearing a more whimsical bucket hat, you could play with pastel colors or even a patterned design.
- Necklaces: Go for the type of necklace you like best: a simple chain, a pendant, or something chunkier. Either way, don’t be afraid to play around and pair up different styles until you find a combination you like!
- Rings: When it comes to rings, choose the style that best fits your tastes—whether you prefer more intricate statement rings or subtle, smaller bands.
- Bracelets: Choose bracelets that add extra personality to your look; a leather band or simple beaded bracelet should do the trick.
- Messenger bags: If you like messenger bags, try finding one with a vintage design to fit the soft boy aesthetic better.
- Crossbody and belt bags: If you prefer crossbody or belt bags, look for one in a neutral shade to match just about anything!
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Color palette We’ve touched on some colors already, but here’s a general guide to the color schemes associated with the soft boy aesthetic. Firstly, subdued colors best fit this style. Think muted tones (like faded blue and yellow or dusty pink), earth tones (like brown, green, and rust orange), soft pastels (like lavender), and, of course, neutral shades that match everything.^{[5]
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- Any color that adds softness and a touch of dreaminess or innocence to your look will likely fit the soft boy aesthetic!

Section 3 of 6:

Grooming Techniques for the Soft Boy Aesthetic

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Hairstyle A curtain hairstyle is a popular choice if you’re trying to achieve a soft boy look; keep your hair looking artfully tousled and unruly. You could also opt for a shaggy cut to give your hair an effortlessly stylish vibe. Let your hair hang in loose waves or curls (if your hair is naturally wavy) up to a medium length—which can be anywhere from around your ears to chin-length. Other soft boy styles include:^{[6]
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- Fringe or bangs: Fringe or bangs are also a common look for guys with the soft boy aesthetic; they can add a touch of youthfulness to your look!
- Bowl cut: Bowl cuts can give you a bit of the innocence associated with the soft boy aesthetic.
- Mullet: You might not expect to see a mullet on this list, but they fit with the retro, vintage side of the soft boy aesthetic.
- Dyed hair: If you like the idea of dyeing your hair and don’t mind a bit of color, try adding some playful pastel highlights.
Most often, the soft boy aesthetic involves no facial hair or light facial hair. If you choose to grow facial hair, maintain it carefully and keep it short, but aim for a look that’s just a little bit scruffy, too. The soft boy aesthetic is all about relaxed, whimsical vibes and effortless cool—so that’s what your facial hair should have, too.^{[7]
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Section 4 of 6:

What makes someone a soft boy?

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This “soft boy” personality is the polar opposite of the “macho” male stereotype; soft boys aren’t afraid to get in touch with their emotions or be emotionally vulnerable around other people. They’re aware of how they feel, and they can pick up on other people's emotions easily as well—making soft boys sensitive and empathetic.^{[8]
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Literature, philosophy—a guy who fits the soft boy aesthetic will likely find all of it fascinating. Soft boys enjoy deep intellectual conversations far more than casual chatter and prefer to explore topics they care about, from a recent book they read to the avante-garde music they’re currently listening to. They love nothing more than connecting with others intellectually!
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Artistic The soft boy style aesthetic is often artsy and whimsical, so it shouldn’t be surprising that guys who fit the soft boy personality type often enjoy a wide variety of artistic hobbies, from making music to writing poetry, and typically engage with non-mainstream art from other people; they might listen to indie music or view art galleries featuring more obscure artists.
- Soft boys also tend to have aesthetic, carefully curated social media profiles on platforms like Instagram or Tumblr.

Section 5 of 6:

Where does the soft boy aesthetic come from?

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The aesthetic is influenced by pop culture and social media. Although the soft boy aesthetic isn’t new, it's more popular than ever—and the current surge comes primarily from TikTok. Celebrities like Harry Styles and K-pop band BTS are common examples of the soft boy aesthetic, and sharing their sense of style on TikTok has led to many people adopting it for themselves.^{[9]
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- Before that, the idea of a “soft boy aesthetic” was part of many different internet subcultures, especially on Tumblr, YouTube, and Reddit, where it evolved and grew until reaching its current level of popularity.
- The aesthetic is also an offshoot of the soft grunge aesthetic—which, again, became popular on Tumblr in recent years.
- The soft boy aesthetic can also be considered the male counterpart to a “VSCO girl” or “e-girl,” which also involves wearing oversized tops and including lots of colors and playful vibes in your style.

Section 6 of 6:

Related Aesthetics

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E-boys The e-boy (short for electronic boy) aesthetic is essentially the gothic or “emo” parallel of the soft boy aesthetic, embracing an alternative, edgy look. Where the soft boy palette is mainly pastels and earth shades, the e-boy palette features darker colors with lots of black and red.
- E-boy clothing and accessories: Cargo jeans, cuffed black pants, black combat boots, oversized shirts, striped shirts, chain necklaces, and nail polish.
- E-boy fashion icons: Lil Peep, Yungblud, Yung Lean, Chase Hudson, and Josh Richards.
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Skater boys The skater boy aesthetic shares the soft boy’s relaxed vibe and abundance of neutral tones—although it’s a little more casual and adventurous since it’s inspired by skateboarding culture. Additionally, instead of pastels, the skater-boy vibe tends to have pops of bright color against neutral-colored clothing.^{[10]
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- Skater boy clothing and accessories: Graphic t-shirts, baggy shirts, checkered overshirts, branded hoodies, baggy jeans and cargo pants, beanies, bucket hats, Vans (and, of course, skateboards).
- Skater fashion icons: Tony Hawke and Nyjah Huston