How to Bring Discipline into Your Life

Co-authored by Sandra Possing

Last Updated: June 24, 2024 Approved

This article seeks to bring discipline to life in general. Discipline must not be restricted to a child's discipline, and becoming an adult does not make anyone a disciplinarian. Discipline does not indicate punishment, enforcement, or a strict environment. It is possible for anyone to be a disciple of discipline.

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Self analysis

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Analyze yourself first. Work out what things stand in the way of you being more disciplined at the moment. They may be character flaws, an inability to articulate what you want out of life or a preference for losing yourself in stimulants or addictions. Perhaps you conform too much without thinking for yourself; this can make it easy to follow someone else's ideas of discipline without working out discipline that works for you and fulfills your own real needs. Whatever the reason, try to determine it first.^{[1]
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- Why do you feel you are not disciplined enough now? What are the factors standing in the way of you being more disciplined?
- Journal about your thoughts so you have a chance to comprehend them better.^{[2]
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  Expert Source
  
  Sandra Possing
  Life Coach
  
  Expert Interview. 15 July 2020.}
- As well as assessing your own limitations, consider how others in your life impact you. Are you pleasing others too much to spend time on yourself? Are you always giving in to other people's wants and letting yours go by the wayside?
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Seek to convince yourself that you want to learn discipline for the purpose of believing in yourself. This is especially important if you spend a lot of time just pleasing others. It will be a lot more difficult to stay disciplined if you feel you need others to form boundaries for you or to tell you how to act and think or what to do.^{[3]
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- What voices in your head tell you that you're unworthy or a failure? These are negative thoughts that have no basis and need to be tackled in order to introduce self care and discipline in your life. You may need counseling or it could be sufficient for you to work through your negative thoughts using mindfulness or cognitive behavioral techniques.

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We all have blind spots, especially when it comes to the ways we treat others (and ourselves). Unfortunately, it can be pretty tough to take an objective look at what your own weak points are. We’re here to help. Take this quiz to rip off the Band-aid and see what your blind spots really are.

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Incorporating more discipline into your life

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In what area do you want to be more disciplined? Maybe it's work, studies, staying clean, not following a bad habit, etc.
2
Adopt a positive attitude. Decide that you will make the changes needed and seek to remain focused on these. Realize that this isn't going to be easy but treat it as a good challenge, not a source of difficulty or deprivation. Once you make the decision to do something, follow through no matter what. Often there will be moments when a lazy desire comes out and inhibits your work. Remember that these feelings are normal, and even the biggest achievers have them. The difference with them is not that they are somehow "better" than you. They just have a habit of catching these moments and deflecting them before they become significant.^{[4]
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- Accept that you are the person who brings change about in your life, not anyone else. You're not a three year old who needs direction. Seize the day and do what needs to be done.
- Normal routine is comfortable and known. Hence, it will likely draw you back in. Use cues to remind yourself that you're falling back into old habits and make decisions to stop each time.
- Try to read and listen to a lot of positive content, such as self-help books or podcasts.^{[5]
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  Expert Source
  
  Sandra Possing
  Life Coach
  
  Expert Interview. 15 July 2020.}
Human behavioral traits are influenced by cultures, divergent attitudes, emotions, different values, and other social norms within a person's group or community. Be sure to behave politely and with a common sense in all situations.^{[6]
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Learn the basics of self-management. From budgeting your finances to organizing a get-together, you will need to learn how to manage certain things on your own. It certainly doesn't entail the starting of a Fortune 500 company, but simply a sense of order in life. Do more things at a certain time, and start small. For example, take lunch after 12:00 PM and dinner after 8:00 PM.
- Plan your work. Make a timetable and follow it assiduously.
- Divide work into small and achievable pieces.
- Sit for no more than an hour at a time. Get up, stretch and walk around. Give your body and your mind a break. You will come back to any task refreshed and physically relaxed.
This will not only benefit you, but it will also make you feel good. Cleanliness makes a big difference in how you feel emotionally and it will make your environment better and fresher for you. There are many articles on how to accomplish this available on this site and elsewhere^{[7]
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Communicate eloquently and assertively, and use appropriate gestures when there is a need to do so. Do not shout or use intensifiers in your speech. Discipline in the subtle arts of communication can make a difference in the discipline you exhibit in the more noticeable areas of your life.^{[8]
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There will always be someone who benefits from your lack of discipline and when you make it clear that you're changing this, it threatens them. Be alert to attempts to divert you from your new path and desire to stick to it. Listen to them, be polite but don't act on their delay or diversion tactics. Stick with what you know is better for you.
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Once you learn to do something correctly, keep doing it. Make your regular routines as automatic as breathing.^{[9]
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Sandra Possing
Life Coach

Expert Interview. 15 July 2020.}^{[10]
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- Include rewards for achieving goals.

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You can never be a self-disciplinarian. Be a disciple of self-discipline and it will be a quality in you.

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Self discipline is not at you, it is in you. It is a quality, not a quantity. It can be brought in life, not bought in life.

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Keep yourself motivated, by reminding yourself of your reasons to go on.

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Warnings

Avoid burnout. Take things step-by-step rather than all at once. Even the slightest things can become backbreaking when piled up on one another.

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Helpful 38 Not Helpful 5
Try not to preach or pick at others for what may seem like a lack of discipline on their part. If what they fail to accomplish does affect you in some way, have a gentle talk with them. If it doesn't, let them deal with their own problems. You cannot change others, only yourself.

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Don't overdo it. Signs of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) can occur in people who feel the need to put routine over common sense and well-being. If your routines startle or annoy others, that may be a sign to slow down.

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