This article was co-authored by Shelby Devlin, MA and by wikiHow staff writer, Danielle Blinka, MA, MPA. Shelby Devlin is a Sex & Intimacy Coach based in San Francisco, California. She has over 7 years of experience guiding individuals and couples in deepening their capacity for intimacy and pleasure. Shelby specializes in BDSM therapy, D/s, and fetish exploration. She earned an MA in Sexuality Studies from San Francisco State University and is certified in the Somatic Method, an experiential therapy modality. Shelby is also a certified massage therapist (CMT) and an associate practitioner of Ortho bionomy. She has a 5-star coaching rating.
There are 15 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
This article has been fact-checked, ensuring the accuracy of any cited facts and confirming the authority of its sources.
This article has been viewed 1,145,752 times.
It's totally normal to be curious about your body and your sexuality as a teen. Getting a sex toy can help you figure out what feels good to you and allows you to relieve your sexual urges. In most areas, it's not illegal for teens to buy sex toys—you don’t have to have reached legal adulthood or even your local age of consent to buy these items. But it can be difficult since most sex stores won't allow teens inside. Fortunately, you can buy a sex toy at certain stores or online!
Steps
-
Decide which type of toy you want to try. You have several options when it comes to sex toys, so consider which one best fits your needs. If this is your first toy, you'll likely be most interested in a vibrator, dildo, or Fleshlight. Here is an overview of the most popular sex toys for beginners:[1]
- Vibrators: Vibrators come in different shapes and sizes. Everyone can enjoy the sensation of a vibrator. You can hold it against your external genital area or insert it in your vagina or anus.
- Dildos: Dildos look like a penis and come in different sizes. You can use a dildo inside your vagina or anus. Some models also vibrate for added pleasure.
- Strap-on dildo: This toy looks like a belt with a dildo attached to it. You can wear it while having sex with someone.
- Fleshlight: A Fleshlight is a sleeve that resembles a vagina. You can insert your penis into it during masturbation.
- Penis ring: A penis ring goes around your penis. It can prolong an erection, and you can also get a vibrating ring that creates a pleasurable sensation.
- Anal beads: This toy looks like a strip of beads that come in different sizes. You insert the beads into your anus for a pleasurable sensation.
-
Read reviews online to help you pick the best sex toy for your budget. Buying a sex toy can be tricky, especially if this is your first toy. Fortunately, most of the toys you'll find available for sale have been reviewed online. Do an online search for sex toy reviews and look for products that have good reviews. Pick 3-5 products that have good reviews so you'll have a few options as you shop for your toy.[2]
- If your friends have sex toys, ask them what they like and don't like about their toy. They may be able to recommend a good option for you.
- Don't buy a toy solely because it's cheap - toys that are extremely cheap are often not safe to use. Look at the reviews and item details, too.
Tip: Every sex toy is different. For instance, some vibrators will be fast, while others will be slow. Similarly, dildos come in a variety of sizes. This means some toys may pleasure you more than others. Reading the reviews can help you figure out which toy is likely to provide you the most pleasure.
Advertisement -
Choose a good-quality toy made of body-safe material. Not all sex toys are made equally, and some are safer than others. You don't want your sex toy to damage your vagina or anus, break inside you, or otherwise cause pain. To be on the safe side, stick to toys that have a smooth surface and are made of sturdy materials, like stainless steel, glass, and silicone.[3]
- Stainless steel has a smooth surface without any places for bacteria to grow.
- If a toy has holes or edges, it may scratch you when you're using it. This might cause pain or irritation, so it's best to skip these toys.
- Don't purchase "jelly" toys or toys made of PVC; these materials have been linked to cancer and can cause irritation.[4] [5]
- Toys made of TPR, TPE, Elastomer, and SEBS are not as risky as jelly or PVC toys, but these toys can't be fully cleaned due to the material's pores. This means the toy can grow bacteria once used, so it's best avoided if possible.[6]
Tip: Silicone, glass, and plastic are all safe materials for sex toys. However, it's best to stick to silicone and plastic when you're first exploring sex toys because they're less likely to break.
-
Make sure your sex toy has a flared end if you're inserting it. This is typically important for dildos or vibrators that you want to insert into your body. You'll need to be able to grip the end of your sex toy as you slide it into your vagina or anus. This helps you keep control of the toy so it doesn't go further than you like and so you can pull it in and out. Check the base on each sex toy that you look at to make sure it widens at the base.[7]
- Similarly, anal beads will typically have a ring at the end that stays outside your anus and allows you to easily remove the beads.
- Toys inserted into your vagina can't get stuck inside you; your vagina is only a few inches long. However, anal toys without flared ends can get stuck inside you (and require an ER visit to get out), so do not use a toy without a flared base for anal play.[8]
-
Purchase a water-based lubricant if you plan to insert your sex toy. You can use many sex toys, like dildos, anal beads, and vibrators, inside your vagina or anus. The lube will help the toy slide comfortably inside, and makes pain or injury less likely. Pick a water-based lubricant to help your toys easily slide in and out.[9]
- Avoid lubes that are scented or warming because they can cause irritation.
- Check the ingredients of lube before you buy it. Some lubes contain parabens or other ingredients that can cause allergic reactions.
- If you choose a plastic sex toy, you can use a silicone-based lube if you prefer.
Warning: If you experience any pain when using your toy, stop. Pain means something is wrong, and you could seriously hurt yourself. Add more lube, make sure you're aroused enough, and take it slowly - don't force it.
-
Get a prepaid debit or gift card if you want to shop online. Shopping online is typically the best option if you're a teen who wants more than just a basic dildo or vibrator. This allows you to buy any of the items you'd find in a sex shop despite your age. However, you can't shop online without a debit card, credit card, or gift card. Fortunately, anyone can buy a prepaid debit or gift card to use for online shopping.[10]
- It's not illegal to buy a sex toy from a website as a teen. The only reason you can't go into a sex shop is that they tend to restrict their stores to 18 and up.
-
Purchase a prepaid debit or gift card at a grocery or department store. Look for a rack of prepaid gift and debit cards at your local grocery or department store. Get a gift card if you see one for the store you plan to order from. Otherwise, get a prepaid debit card that you can use at any store.[11]
- Keep in mind that prepaid debit cards typically carry an additional fee, which will be around $5.
-
Visit a website that sells sex toys. You can find several shops online that sell sex toys. Check out each site and pick the one that you like best. Here are some examples:[12]
- Babeland
- SheVibe
- The Smitten Kitten
- My Pleasure
- Good Vibes
- Early to Bed
- Come As You Are
Warning: Do not purchase sex toys from Amazon. There are many retailers on Amazon selling dangerous or counterfeit sex toys, and you don't know the quality or safety of what you're getting. Buy from a reputable online sex store instead.[13]
-
Select the product you want and place it in your cart. Search for the type of product that you want or click the tab for that particular product. Then, scroll through the options and pick the one that you like best. Add that product to your online cart.[14]
- Look for the items you selected when you were reading online reviews. They're likely the best option for you.
-
Checkout using your prepaid debit or gift card. Click the button to check out, then fill out your shipping and billing information. For your payment option, select debit/credit card if you're using a prepaid debit card. If you're using a gift card, select gift card. Then, enter the card information and hit the button to submit your order.[15]
- You may need to scratch off a strip on the back of your card to reveal the information you need to input your payment method.
-
Wait for your package to arrive. Keep an eye out for your sex toy to arrive in the mail. It should come in a plain brown shipping container, which will protect your privacy.[16]
- If you get a tracking code, check it every day to monitor your package's progress. That will help you make sure you get the package before your parents or guardians do.
Tip: If you don't want your parents or guardians finding out what you bought, tell them you ordered something else as a cover story. As an example, buy a book from a local bookstore and hide it in your room. Then, tell your parents that you ordered the book. When your package arrives, tell them your book came in.
-
Look for a drug store or novelty shop that sells sex toys. These stores don't have age restrictions that will prevent you from entering, so they're a great option for buying a sex toy as a teen. At a drug store or department store, look for the sex toys near the family planning or condom section. If you're at a novelty store, search for a section that has adult-themed toys and gifts. You may find sex toys at the following retailers:[17]
- Spencer's Gifts
- Walmart
- CVS pharmacy
- Walgreens
- Target
-
Pick out the toy that you want. Most of these shops will have a few options. At a drug store or department store, you're most likely to find dildos, vibrators, and possibly penis rings. However, a novelty shop may also have other toys, like anal beads, Fleshlights, and strap-on penises. Select the toy that looks most interesting to you.
- You'll need to shop online if you want a wider array of options.
-
Hide the toy under another product if you feel embarrassed. Being curious about your sexuality is totally normal, so there's no reason to feel embarrassed. However, it's okay to feel uncomfortable when you're buying a sex toy, so you may prefer to hide it under another product. Place the other product on top of the sex toy or drape it over it.[18]
- This works best if your sex toy is in a shopping basket. However, you can definitely hide it in your hand, as well. Something soft like clothing will work best, but you can use any product.
-
Pay for your sex toy at the register. Put your sex toy on the counter or conveyor belt when you reach the register. It's okay to put the product you're using to hide the toy on top of it. The cashier will scan both items. Finally, pay for your items with cash, a gift card, or another method of payment.[19]
- Don't feel obligated to talk to the cashier about your purchase. They probably aren't even paying attention to what you're buying.
Tip: If the store has a self-checkout, you might prefer to use that if you're feeling embarrassed about buying a sex toy.
Expert Q&A
Tips
-
Cleaning your toys properly is really important for your sexual health, since using a dirty toy can put you at risk of getting an infection.[20] Wash your sex toy with soap and warm water or follow the cleaning instructions on the package after each time you use.[21] Stainless steel, glass, and silicone toys can be put in the dishwasher.Thanks
-
You can buy sex toys if you’re under 18, but that’s not true of all adult items. For example, in most states in the U.S., it’s illegal for stores to sell sexually explicit materials, such as pornographic videos or magazines, to minors.[22]Thanks
-
Find a good hiding spot for your toy. For instance, you might place the toy in a box and keep it in a drawer or the back of your closet.Thanks
Warnings
- Remember to thoroughly clean your sex toys after using them. Rinsing the toy with warm (liquid) soapy water will suffice. Wipe them with a damp paper towel.Thanks
- Avoid buying sex toys on Amazon. They are often unsafe and made of porous materials which can give you infections such as bacterial vaginosis or cause a urinary tract infection. Buy sex toys from stores that specialize in sex toys.Thanks
- Never share your sex toys if you haven't cleaned and covered them with a condom. It can increase your risk of contracting a sexually transmitted infection (STI).[23] Sharing sex toys is not recommended, but if you choose to do it anyway, put a condom on it before using it and change the condom between users. [24]Thanks
- Don't put a toy that's been in your anus into your vagina without cleaning it first.[25]Thanks
Expert Interview
Thanks for reading our article! If you'd like to learn more about sex toys, check out our in-depth interview with Shelby Devlin, MA.
References
- ↑ https://www.plannedparenthood.org/learn/sex-pleasure-and-sexual-dysfunction/sex-and-pleasure/sex-toys
- ↑ https://www.teenvogue.com/story/what-you-should-know-before-buying-your-first-vibrator
- ↑ https://www.womens-health.com/sex-toy-materials
- ↑ https://www.womens-health.com/sex-toy-materials
- ↑ https://dangerouslilly.com/2010/10/yes-jelly-sex-toys-can-be-dangerous/
- ↑ https://dangerouslilly.com/toxictoys/
- ↑ https://teenhealthsource.com/sex/sex-toys/
- ↑ https://www.scarleteen.com/article/sexuality/diy_sex_toys_selflove_edition
- ↑ https://www.teenvogue.com/story/what-you-should-know-before-buying-your-first-vibrator
- ↑ https://www.nerdwallet.com/blog/banking/gift-card-vs-prepaid-debit-card-whats-the-better-gift/
- ↑ https://www.nerdwallet.com/blog/banking/gift-card-vs-prepaid-debit-card-whats-the-better-gift/
- ↑ https://www.self.com/story/sex-toy-shopping-tips
- ↑ https://dangerouslilly.com/2014/11/sex-toys-from-amazon-gamble/
- ↑ https://www.self.com/story/sex-toy-shopping-tips
- ↑ https://www.nerdwallet.com/blog/banking/gift-card-vs-prepaid-debit-card-whats-the-better-gift/
- ↑ https://www.self.com/story/sex-toy-shopping-tips
- ↑ https://www.self.com/story/sex-toy-shopping-tips
- ↑ https://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/advice/a6299/the-11-emotional-stages-of-buying-a-sex-toy/
- ↑ https://www.thrillist.com/sex-dating/nation/tips-for-buying-sex-toys
- ↑ https://www.brown.edu/campus-life/health/services/promotion/content/whats-best-way-clean-sex-toys
- ↑ https://teenhealthsource.com/sex/sex-toys/
- ↑ https://firstamendment.mtsu.edu/article/harmful-to-minors-laws/
- ↑ https://teenhealthsource.com/sex/sex-toys/
- ↑ https://www.scarleteen.com/article/bodies/all_the_barriers_all_the_time
- ↑ https://teenhealthsource.com/sex/sex-toys/
About This Article
If you’re under 18 and interested in exploring your sexuality, there are ways to get hold of a sex toy without being embarrassed. One way you can buy a sex toy online is by using a prepaid credit card from a department store or pharmacy, since these can be used at any website that accepts credit cards. After buying a prepaid credit card, find a reputable site that sells the toy you’re interested in and add it to your cart. As you check out, enter the information for the prepaid card as if it were a credit card. Make sure to order from a website that uses “discreet packaging” to avoid getting caught. Otherwise, you might need to carefully plan out the arrival date. For more advice, like how to buy a sex toy from a store, scroll down!
Reader Success Stories
-
"This article helped a ton by telling me what to use and what not to use. It also helped me with what online or public stores to go for sex toys!"..." more