This article was reviewed by Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW and by wikiHow staff writer, Sophie Burkholder, BA. Kelli Miller is a Psychotherapist based in Los Angeles, California. Kelli specializes in individual and couples therapy focusing on relationships, depression, anxiety, sexuality, communication, parenting, and more. She is the author of “Love Hacks: Simple Solutions to Your Most Common Relationship Issues” which details the top 15 relationship issues and 3 quick solutions to each. She is also the award-winning and best-selling author of “Thriving with ADHD”. Kelli co-hosted an advice show on LA Talk Radio and was a relationship expert for The Examiner. She received her MSW (Masters of Social Work) from the University of Pennsylvania and a BA in Sociology/Health from the University of Florida.
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Duality thinking divides the world into opposites: good versus evil, nature versus nurture, breakfast versus break-slow…well, maybe not that last one. Dualistic thinkers use these extreme pairs to simplify complex concepts into black-and-white snapshots. But duality thinking is a complex concept itself and can be difficult to wrap your head (vs. heart) around. This article will tell you the definition of duality thinking with concrete examples from the real world and how dualistic thinking impacts us all.
Things You Should Know
- Duality thinking is a type of thinking that assumes there are only two distinct, opposing options. For example, people are either good or bad, with no in-between.
- Examples of duality thinking include male vs. female, smart vs. stupid, positive vs. negative, true vs. false, or individualism vs. collectivism.
- To change your duality thinking, try to seek out diverse perspectives, practice mindfulness in discussions with others, and recognize your unconscious biases.
Steps
Overcoming Duality Thinking
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Seek out diverse perspectives. Read books and news articles, or watch movies with different ideas or ways of thinking. Engage with people from different backgrounds. Remember that you don’t have to agree with these people or ideas, but they may help you understand the complexities of life.[12]
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Practice mindfulness and awareness. Ask yourself the following questions the next time you’re discussing an issue with someone:[13]
- Are you actually listening to their point of view?
- Are you only listening to multiple perspectives so you look good?
- Could their perspective change yours if it had good logic?
- How often do you genuinely set your perspective aside?
- Are you debating more than dialoguing or discussing?
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Recognize your unconscious biases. While it can be difficult to admit, we all have unconscious biases that affect how we treat people. The important part is doing the work to become more inclusive and understanding of all people and perspectives.[14]
- Pay attention to your thoughts, especially when making assumptions about others.
- Examine the actual beliefs behind your assumptions. If someone is crying at work and your unconscious tells you they’re weak, ask if they’re okay. Maybe they’re in a difficult situation and are showing incredible strength just coming into the office!
- Consider how you react to people from different backgrounds and if you hold any stereotypes about certain racial or social groups.
- Let others challenge your beliefs and give you feedback. Accept this constructive criticism with an open mind.
- Keep a list of unconscious biases to return to and examine.
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Detach yourself from a single outcome. Starting with a so-called correct outcome in your head will limit your possibilities for success and growth. Practice seeing success as inviting new ideas and seeing what works best. If the outcome isn’t what you hoped for, take it as a lesson rather than a failure.[15]
Expert Q&A
Tips
References
- ↑ https://cac.org/daily-meditations/the-dualistic-mind-2017-01-29/
- ↑ https://brainworldmagazine.com/question-good-versus-evil/
- ↑ https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/right_and_wrong_in_the_real_world
- ↑ https://www.multipleintelligencesoasis.org/a-beginners-guide-to-mi
- ↑ https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0195666321000581
- ↑ https://dceg.cancer.gov/about/diversity-inclusion/inclusivity-minute/2022/beyond-gender-binary
- ↑ https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/many-differences-between-liberals-and-conservatives-may-boil-down-to-one-belief/
- ↑ https://helpfulprofessor.com/dualistic-thinking/
- ↑ https://equality.leeds.ac.uk/wp-content/uploads/sites/64/2017/06/Briefing-note-Atheism.pdf
- ↑ https://academic.oup.com/book/3787/chapter-abstract/145236773?redirectedFrom=fulltext
- ↑ https://www.afsusa.org/study-abroad/culture-trek/culture-points/culture-points-individualism-and-collectivism/
- ↑ https://www.fierceinc.com/different-perspectives-lead-to-the-best-ideas-here-s-why/
- ↑ https://www.nytimes.com/2017/10/04/well/mind/how-to-be-mindful-in-an-argument.html
- ↑ https://hbr.org/2022/02/are-you-aware-of-your-biases
- ↑ https://www.createcoachingconsulting.com/how-to-practice-detachment-in-your-business/
- ↑ https://ejournal.unisba.ac.id/index.php/mimbar/article/view/6652/pdf
- ↑ https://www.globalcognition.org/cultural-norms/
- ↑ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4451179/
- ↑ https://cac.org/daily-meditations/the-dualistic-mind-2017-01-29/
- ↑ https://sites.uw.edu/safs-dei/2021/07/16/power-and-privilege/
- ↑ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK24680/