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You don’t need social media to live a fulfilling life. Devoting less time to social media will help you recover time you didn’t know you had—time you can spend on the stuff that makes you truly happy. Whether you’ve decided to give it up entirely or cut back, seek alternatives for things you’d normally do on social media. Replacing idle time with activities and positive social interactions will keep you happy and connected without social media.
Steps
Leaving Social Media
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Deactivate your social media accounts. You may find it easier to stop using social media if you deactivate or get rid of your accounts altogether. Most social media sites allow you to deactivate your account rather than delete it completely in case you want to come back.
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Remove social media apps from your tablet or smartphone. Every time you go onto your phone and see the Facebook app, you risk temptation. Deleting these apps makes it easier to stay off social media and focus on what matters most to you.Advertisement
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Block social media websites in your browser. If you're finding it hard to avoid visiting social media websites, download a browser extension like StayFocusd to block the sites.[1]
- If this seems like an extreme step, only go halfway. Block these sites only on your primary web browser so you can still access them elsewhere. If you prefer, you can limit your time on certain websites rather than block them completely.
- If you need to, you can also block these sites on your iPhone or Android.
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Change your routines to avoid social media. Some people check their social media accounts as soon as they wake up, during breaks at work or school, and while falling asleep. Think about when you tend to look at social media, and then find another activity to fill that time.
- While eating meals, focus on the food. Think about the taste and texture. If you’re eating with others, talk to them instead of looking at your phone.
- When you feel like having a conversation with someone, do it in person. If nobody is around, try going to a café or other busy location where people may be available to chat.
- Keep your phone far away from you at night. Not only will this prevent you from using social media, but you may fall asleep more easily.[2]
Finding Alternatives to Social Media
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Take out a sheet of paper and a pen. If you think about it, there are both positive and negative things about social media. If social media didn’t have its benefits, you wouldn’t spend so much time with it! To live happily without social media, you’ll have to replace the positive things about it with positive alternatives. Start by making a few lists.
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Write a list of good things about using social media. What is it that you like about social media? Use concrete examples, like:
- “I can keep in touch with my friends who live far away.”
- “I can find out about things happening in my area.”
- “I’m reminded of my friends’ birthdays.”
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List ways to do those things without social media. Now that you have a list of social media positives, figure out how to accomplish those tasks (or get those feelings) without being tethered to a computer or cell phone. For example:
- “I will send letters to and plan to visit my faraway friends.”
- “I will find events in the newspaper or by asking friends what they are doing.”
- “I will make a list of birthdays and pin it to my wall.”
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Make a list of the things you don’t like about using social media. Now you’ll make a list of concrete things that bother you about social media. Consider things you haven’t done or finished because of the time you spend on social media. Examples:
- “I use social media instead of [something you love to do].”
- “I don’t get enough sleep because of how I use social media.”
- “I feel insecure when I look at social media.”
Emma Chamberlain, Social Media Personality & InfluencerSocial media breeds comparison. "I grew up on social media and it was tough feeling like everyone I watched had a perfect life. I couldn't help but feel that my life sucked when I watched their videos."
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List ways to improve the negatives by leaving social media. How will those negative things in your life turn into positives if you leave social media?
- “I will have more time to do [something you love to do].”
- “I will be able to fall asleep earlier if I’m not looking at social media.”
- “I will feel better about myself if I don’t see things that make me feel insecure on social media.”
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Throw yourself into a new hobby. In addition to getting really good at something, devoting time to a new hobby will help you fill the idle time you once filled with social media. Having a hobby will also boost your creativity and keep your brain sharp.[3] If you’re having trouble thinking of a new hobby, take a look at some of these ideas:
- Art: Comics illustration, film-making, jewelry-making, making your own clothes, macramé, decoupage, interior design, makeup.
- Music: Analog synthesizers, choir, making guitar pedals, becoming a DJ.
- Writing: Lyric poetry, amateur journalism, short stories, personal memoirs.
- Exercise: Martial arts, swimming, dancing, aerial yoga.
- Helping others: Raising money for a good cause, helping a non-native speaker learn your language, training pets, sharing meals with people experiencing poverty.
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Find a penpal. If part of what you like about social media is how easy it is to meet people, seek a penpal instead. When looking for a penpal, think about things that would keep you interested in writing to someone new. You’ll likely find that getting interesting things in your mailbox is more exciting than any social media notification.
- Finding a penpal in another country is a fun way to learn about other places.
- In addition to writing letters, you can send and receive mix CDs of your favorite music, artwork, stickers, photos, and books.
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Stay on top of current events. Because the majority of people get their news on social media, you may be surprised to learn that there are other ways to stay connected to current events.[4] Most areas still print newspapers, most of which you can also find on the web. News radio, podcasts, and television news networks may even expose you to a wider variety of information than what’s supplied by your social networks.
Maintaining an Offline Social Life
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Ask your friends for their contact information. Studies show that while social media keeps us connected to others online, it decreases the quality of our off-line relationships.[5] You can strengthen these relationships by gathering phone numbers and addresses from people you care about. Write this information down in an address book or personal organizer and keep it handy.
- It’s also a good idea to ask them how they like to be contacted. Some people may be more open to talking on the phone than others.
- People who are less likely to talk on the phone or make in-person plans may prefer communicating via email.
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Ask your friends and family to put away their phones. When spending quality time with someone, ask them to save social media and texting for later. It probably doesn’t feel good to compete with social media for your friends’ attention. Also, hearing about what’s happening on Instagram may entice you to return before you’re ready.
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Make plans to do things with other people. Having positive experiences and interactions with friends will help you stay both healthy and happy.[6] When you have fun social events on the horizon, you’ll feel less isolated.
- Find out which bands or artists are visiting your town, and then plan to see the event with friends.
- Research good cafes or restaurants in your area and ask a friend to meet you for a meal.
- Plan a camping trip with a group of people. Try to choose a location where the Internet is inaccessible!
- Sign up for an activity that requires you and a friend to do something at a regularly scheduled time. For example, weekly yoga classes, volunteer opportunities, or writing groups.
- Start a project with a group of people, such as a band, sports team, or foreign language study group.
EXPERT TIPDating CoachJohn Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.John Keegan
Dating CoachSocial media can create a false sense of social fulfillment. Instead of spending time on superficial online interactions, try initiating meaningful conversations or meet in person with someone to build a deeper connection.
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Keep busy. If you often check social media when you’re bored, you’ll need to fill your time with things that keep your mind focused. You can clean, read, study, catch up on homework, or go out. Not only will you stay on top of things like coursework or cleaning, but it may also reduce your social media temptations.
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Become a regular at a café or regular event. Hanging out at the same places often will undoubtedly introduce you to people who share similar interests. When you go to these events, appear relaxed, friendly, and approachable to encourage conversation.
- Go to the same open mic event every month, and maybe even participate!
- Find an art gallery you like and go to their opening every month.
- Visit the same café regularly so people start to recognize you.
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Join a group of people who share the same interests. You can use a site like Meetup.com to make new friends who like to hang out in person. You may find a group that shares a certain identity (e.g., heritage, occupation, orientation) or common interest (e.g., oil painting, beat-making, women’s basketball) and forget all about social media.
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Ask for support. If you find yourself unable to stay off social media, reach out to your friends and family. Tell them why you want to stop using social media, and ask them to help you fill your time.
- Internet addiction can interfere with life to the point of becoming a serious addiction.[7] If you’re feeling shame and having trouble steering clear of social media, there are non-judgmental therapists and help groups who can help you defeat your addiction.
Community Q&A
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QuestionIf I have no social media can I still be popular?Community AnswerAbsolutely! Spend time doing fun things with friends and they'll want to keep hanging out with you. Also, if you spend time learning a cool talent, you can gain more popularity for that than you would any social media post. Just be sure to devote a lot of time to social interaction to stay popular.
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QuestionEveryone makes friends and contacts eachother through social media in my middle school. How do I avoid being socially awkward without social media?Community AnswerYou can build self-confidence by highlighting the things that you're good at. Think about the ways that you're awesome and focus on those things. And while you're on the path to self-confidence, you can fake it to relieve some pressure. Practice confident posture, and be sure not to use any negative self-talk around other people.
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QuestionSocial media is literally all my friends talk about, how can I avoid the topic?Moonmodule1998Top AnswererThis is probably temporary. People go through phases where they use social media extensively, and then begin to wean themselves off it. Be more proactive about making conversation, and changing the subject when necessary. People's lives can't revolve entirely around social media, and there should still be some other things you can find to talk about with others. For example, if you have a friend who loved basketball before social media, then maybe you should start looking into the sport so you can talk to them about this.
Tips
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If you do not want to cut social media out completely, use it in moderation.Thanks
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If living without social media was not your choice (for example, if your parents won’t let you use it), try to turn it into a positive thing. Go for walks, visit family and friends, and get caught up on other forms of entertainment that make you feel good.Thanks
Tips from our Readers
- Try to learn one new thing every week, like a new cooking technique, craft, or some basic vocabulary words in a new language. Even if you don't master everything you set out to learn, knowing a little about a lot of different things will make you a more interesting person.
- If you like memes and funny videos but don't want to use social media apps, you can ask a friend to send you screenshots or links to videos once or twice a week. You don't have to have a TikTok account to watch TikToks!
- Try deleting the apps from your phone and throwing yourself into a TV show with many seasons you can binge-watch. By the time you finish all the seasons, social media will be a distant memory.
- I don't have an account on Facebook, Twitter, or TikTok, but I can design a data center. I'm doing great without social media, and you can too!
References
- ↑ https://www.pcworld.com/article/2158627/get-back-to-work-stayfocusd-youmail-and-other-apps-to-keep-you-on-task.html
- ↑ https://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/12/23/reading-before-bed_n_6372828.html
- ↑ https://www.nytimes.com/2007/12/02/jobs/02career.html
- ↑ https://www.journalism.org/2016/05/26/news-use-across-social-media-platforms-2016/
- ↑ https://www.forbes.com/sites/margiewarrell/2014/02/04/is-facebook-breeding-loneliness/#74b09c2e17b4
- ↑ https://www.health.harvard.edu/newsletter_article/the-health-benefits-of-strong-relationships
- ↑ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3480687/
About This Article
To live without social media, deactivate your accounts and delete any social media apps from your smartphone or tablet, since this will remove the temptation to check them. If you use social media on your computer, use a browser extension like StayFocusd to block social media websites. Additionally, since you’ll have more free time when you stop using social media, you should use it to immerse yourself into a new hobby like writing or learning to play an instrument. When you’re with your family and friends, ask them to use social media when they’re not spending time with you, since you don’t want to be lured back. For more advice, like how to connect with other people who don’t use social media, keep reading!
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