How to Play 7 Minutes in Heaven

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Last Updated: September 22, 2024 Fact Checked

The game 7 Minutes in Heaven is a party game played mostly by teenagers. Two people are chosen to spend 7 minutes alone in a dark, enclosed space. During this time, you can do whatever you choose. Many players use this time to talk privately or take part in more intimate activities, like kissing and making out.^{[1]
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Research source} No matter how you choose to play the game, you should always respect the limits of others and never do anything that makes you uncomfortable.

Part 1

Part 1 of 3:

Playing the Game

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1
Ready the game location. You'll need a small, closed off area of your home to play this game. This area is generally dark, though you could also choose one that is well lit. You might also want to include chairs for players to sit in, though this is not necessary to play the game.^{[2]
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- Some locations you might consider for your game include a closet, a bathroom, or a laundry room, to name a few.
- If you want the room to be dark at all times, you could remove the light bulb(s) from the fixture(s) in the room.
- Be sure that the area is clear and free of any obstacles that might be dangerous, especially if you've removed the lights from the room.
- To keep players from watching the clock, you may want to remove clocks from the room where you'll be playing the game. This may include cell phones and watches.
2
Gather the players. Typically, this game is played with a roughly equal number of boys and girls, though depending on the preferences of the players, this might not always be the case. A group of 10 - 14 is common, though the game can be played with as few as 6 people.
- You may want to play with friends from school, your neighborhood, or if you're at camp, you might try to play the game with campmates.
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3
Explain the rules to the players. Now that the room is prepared and you have your players gathered, you'll need to explain the rules of the game. This is particularly important because there can be many different variations of 7 Minutes in Heaven. Generally, the rules include:
- Selecting two people at random.
- Sending the chosen two into the room for a private 7 minutes. Don't forget to close the door!
- Letting the chosen two out of the room at the end of 7 minutes.
- You might also create "house rules" when you play, like "the lights have to be on/off" or "no watches or cell phones allowed in the room."
- To prevent anyone from feeling uncomfortable, you may want to make a rule that no one has to go into the room unless they want to.^{[3]
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4
Create a random lottery. This is how you're going to select the two people sent into the room for their 7 minutes in heaven. You might spin a bottle to randomly select two people or draw names from a hat. If you want to ensure that a boy and girl each are sent into the room, you could arrange your lottery by gender.
- To split your lottery by gender, you might spin the bottle once for the boys and another time for the girls. The person the bottle points to in each group will be sent to the room.
- When drawing names from a hat or container, you might have one container for girls and one for boys. Each round of the game, you can select one name from each.
5
Play the game. Each round of the game consists of two people in the room for 7 minutes. You can play the game for as many rounds as you want, though you may want other activities, like a board game or cards, to keep other players occupied while waiting for the chosen two to finish their 7 minutes in heaven.^{[4]
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- A timer with a dramatic alert, like a siren, can add to the atmosphere of this game while helping you keep track of time.
- When the timer is up, knock on the door and let the chosen two know that it's time to come out. Then you can select two new players with your random lottery.
- You may want a dramatic reveal at the end of the 7 minutes in heaven. If this is the effect you desire, you could open the door suddenly when the time is up.

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Respecting Limits

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1
Set clear limits before playing. If there are no rules limiting how far you can go when playing this game, it's a good idea to set some personal limits with the person you'll be sharing your 7 minutes in heaven with. If you don't, the other player might misinterpret the signals you are setting and go too far.^{[5]
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- You might say something like, "Can we just talk?" or "Let's talk first. I might be OK with a kiss, but I don't want to rush into it."
- You could also establish a firm boundary by saying, "Kissing is OK, but I'm not OK with other touching."^{[6]
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Voice discomfort as soon as it happens. Sometimes something will make you feel uncomfortable without you knowing it beforehand. When this happens, you should use straightforward language to tell the other player that you feel uncomfortable and want to stop.^{[7]
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- For example, if you are touched in a way you don't like, you could say, "No. I don't want to be touched there."
- It can be difficult telling someone "No," but if you don't, things might go farther than you intended. You should never take part in something that makes you feel uncomfortable.^{[8]
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Ask the other player before trying something new. This includes things like hand-holding, petting, or other kinds of touches that might exceed the personal boundaries of the other player. This way, you don't accidentally violate someone's boundaries without knowing.
- It only takes a quick second to ask, "Is it OK if I hold your hand?" or "Is it alright for me to touch you like this?"

Part 3

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Resisting Peer Pressure

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1
Collect your thoughts.^{[9]
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Research source} Give yourself a moment and take a deep, calming breath. In a peer pressure situation, emotions can get out of hand and make you say or do things you don't mean. Pausing for a moment will help you avoid a hasty response and better understand yourself in the moment.^{[10]
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- You might want to ask yourself, "What kind of person do I want to be? Would that person do this?" If the answer is no, it's likely you should not participate.
2
Speak clearly about your feelings. People often get caught up in group mentality, but by expressing your personal feelings, you can connect with your friends/other players. This brings things from a group context to a personal one, making it easier for your friends to identify with you.^{[11]
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- You could say, "I love hanging out with you guys and I don't want to be a stick in the mud, but I really don't feel comfortable playing this game."
3
Make an excuse. Though honesty is almost always the best policy, if your friends/other players are determined to get you to play, an excuse can come in handy. This doesn't have to be a big fib, you could say something as simple as:^{[12]
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- "My throat's been a little sore lately and I don't want to get anyone sick."
- "I'm really embarrassed, but I have a canker sore that's been bothering me so I can't play."
4
Suggest another activity instead. There are plenty of group games you could play instead, and some of the other players might want to play these even more than 7 Minutes in Heaven. Some examples include Twister, charades, pictionary, UNO, and more.^{[13]
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- You may want to favor games that you know others in the group enjoy. You stand a better chance of playing a different game if others want to play.

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Question

Why can't it be 20 minutes instead of 7 minutes?

Community Answer

It can be if you want. It is just tradition that but most people do seven minutes, also some people may not want to leave people in there too long so that nothing bad happens.

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Is it true that sometimes people have sex while in the closet during playing 7 minutes in heaven?

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It is true that sometimes people take this game to an intimate level, but you should never take part in something that makes you feel uncomfortable or engage in sex before you are ready. Doing so could result in pregnancy, sexually transmitted diseases, or other complicated situations.

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What do I do if I would like to go longer than seven minutes?

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You could ask before the game starts if everyone wants to agree on a longer time period. Otherwise, try to stick to the seven minutes so everyone gets a turn to play.

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Tips

Keep things fun and light. This should be an enjoyable game, not a humiliating or crude game.

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Ask them how the 7 minutes went, or have the couple write the session down afterward.

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Don't put any pressure on the two players when they come out after the 7 minutes. Leave them to it for a while afterwards.

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If you do agree to play, don't make it a huge deal when other people come out of the closet. Some light teasing is fine, but then drop the subject! Don't make other players feel ashamed, and definitely don't spread rumors afterward.

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