This article was co-authored by Sandra Possing. Sandra Possing is a life coach, speaker, and entrepreneur based in the San Francisco Bay Area. Sandra specializes in one-on-one coaching with a focus on mindset and leadership transformation. Sandra received her coaching training from The Coaches Training Institute and has seven years of life coaching experience. She holds a BA in Anthropology from the University of California, Los Angeles.
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Have you ever felt your heart smiling, because of that warm smile from a stranger or that sweet little chat you had with a loved one? Have you ever felt inspired and appreciated by someone and wished that one day, you could make an impact on the world like the influence they had on you?
Steps
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Be yourself. If you're not comfortable, most people can detect your uneasiness. Don't do things you don't like or feel uncomfortable doing. Don't change yourself to please others. It's your life, your choice. You may be happy in the short term when you are able to please someone, but in the long term it is unlikely to work out. Do things that make you feel good about yourself and give meaning to your life. Keep in mind that nobody has the exact same mind and or experience. That's what makes us unique individuals.[1]
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Be open minded. The effect of making the other person lose self esteem does not always take place immediately. Watch what you say and do. Avoid religious intolerance, racism, sexism, stereotypes, criticism, and hate.
- Seek out people and experiences that are different or new. Aim to understand and learn from them, not judge them.
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Smile whenever you can, to everybody. It will make their day.[2]
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Follow your instincts,[3] act from the heart.
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Learn to respect others' perspectives even though they differ from yours. Have respect and compassion for people that are different from you.
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Don't criticize others on little things, because everyone makes mistakes and all people are different. As much as some people would like to believe otherwise, nobody is perfect.[4]
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Never talk behind people's backs. This is emotional abuse. Gossiping, starting rumors, carrying on rumors, exaggerating and backstabbing, along with others in its category can make people not like you, but even hate you. It's hurtful and nobody gains anything from it. Don't be one of those people that get a temporary boost by putting others down.[5]
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Love everyone, forgive the ones that have hurt you. This step is easier said than done, but achieving it will lift the weights off of your heart. Untying the knot will give you more time to focus on the people and things that are more important to you.[6]
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Experience for yourself! Keep others' opinions in mind, and be aware when warnings are given to you, but don't be a sheep! Your friends may hate Ricky, but that doesn't mean he's a terrible person. Get to know him yourself.[7]
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Appreciate life, all the ups and downs. It is so much easier to enjoy yourself this way, and people are usually attracted to individuals that are cheerful, because really, most if not all people want to feel that joy.[8]
Community Q&A
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QuestionHow can you prove myself in school?Community AnswerFirst, show the teachers that you know how to balance school, home, and outside activities. Second, stay away from the things like drugs, unsavory crowds etc. Third, keep your grades up. Finally, go the extra mile -- If your grade, for example is a B+, ask for extra credit and that can help you bring it up and show the teacher that you're serious about school.
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QuestionWhat should I do when I am jealous?Community AnswerJealousy is a natural feeling everybody gets once in a while. If you feel jealous, remind yourself that your life is great too, then work on the parts you'd like to improve.
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QuestionHow can I prove my innocence to others?Community AnswerYou may not be able to. Simply speaking the truth about what happened is sometimes all you can do. Most times, the truth eventually does come to light, so patience and a humble willingness to be judged and misunderstood is sometimes necessary. Pray for God to give you the grace to handle it while you wait.
Tips
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Help others out without longing for a reward. Ask yourself, 'is it not happiness in itself when you allow someone to breathe easier?'Thanks
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Follow your instincts, don't do anything you think you might regret.Thanks
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Everyday, do something you enjoy.Thanks
Warnings
- Try not to lose your temper. Do things that would release your stress; familiar things that you enjoy and long to do.Thanks
- Don't beat yourself up for any reason, just like anger, it won't solve anything. Particularly not for something you cannot change. If you cannot change something, move on.Thanks
- Don't lie or be dishonest in any way. Avoid it as much as possible.Thanks
- Don't try to start anything. Walk away. You may seem a coward to close mindedness, but you'd be a hero to wisdom!Thanks
References
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/click-here-happiness/201810/how-be-yourself-in-five-simple-steps
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/changepower/201605/the-9-superpowers-your-smile
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/prescriptions-life/201202/avoid-pain-maximize-success-listen-and-follow-your-instincts
- ↑ https://blogs.psychcentral.com/imperfect/2016/01/6-easy-ways-to-stop-criticizing-and-improve-your-relationships/
- ↑ https://tinybuddha.com/blog/how-to-stop-gossiping-and-creating-drama/
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/mindful-anger/201409/how-do-you-forgive-even-when-it-feels-impossible-part-1
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/emotional-fitness/201103/10-ways-feel-better-about-yourself
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/your-emotional-meter/201907/how-appreciate-what-you-have-already
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