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QuestionHow do you deal with backstabbers at work?
Meredith Walters, MBAMeredith Walters is a Certified Career Coach based in Decatur, Georgia. Meredith's coaching program helps people develop the skills they need to find meaningful, fulfilling work. Meredith has over 12 years of career and life coaching experience, including conducting training at Emory University's Goizueta School of Business and the US Peace Corps. She is a former Member of the Board of Directors of ICF-Georgia. She earned her coaching credentials from New Ventures West. She received a BA in English Literature from the University of California at Berkeley and a Master of Business Administration from the University of San Francisco.
Certified Career CoachPeople are rarely toxic for no reason at all. Start by pulling the problematic coworker aside and speaking to them privately. Ask them honestly, and openly, what their problem with you is. It may be that they have something going on in their personal life, or that you don't have all of the information. Just try to be empathetic and see things from your coworker's perspective. Even if they do authentically dislike you, at least now you know and you tried to address the problem as a professional. -
QuestionHow do I deal with a confrontational coworker?
Paul Chernyak, LPCPaul Chernyak is a Licensed Professional Counselor in Chicago. He graduated from the American School of Professional Psychology in 2011.
Licensed Professional CounselorYour best bet is to keep the conversation about the work and avoid being defensive or overly personal. You will also need to set boundaries with them and be direct about how their behavior is affecting you. Try to use only "I" or "me" statements when setting boundaries for the greatest effect. -
QuestionI think I'm a helpful yet bossy coworker, but know that I annoy my coworkers. Any advice to fight this sincere urge to help others?Paul Chernyak, LPCPaul Chernyak is a Licensed Professional Counselor in Chicago. He graduated from the American School of Professional Psychology in 2011.
Licensed Professional CounselorYou should consider taking a step back and seeking the advice of your coworkers directly. You seem to be aware that your actions annoy them. It might be helpful to get their opinion on how they would prefer to work together and try to accommodate their needs. -
QuestionMy co-worker (who is a subordinate) constantly writes in emails to me, "Thanks for your help," but it is in a condescending way because she is responding to constructive criticism I have sent to her. How can I stop this?
Community AnswerI do not understand what is condescending; it sounds like this person is simply thanking you for telling them your input. It is not unusual to be polite to both superiors and subordinates. Even if her gratitude is somewhat disingenuous, it sounds like she's just trying to be respectful. -
QuestionWhat do I do if my coworker is acting like my superior when they're not?
Community AnswerThank them for their opinion, then let them know you’re more than capable of doing your job without their assistance.
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QuestionMy coworker sends emails to me that question my competency, what should I do?
Community AnswerTry talking to the coworker using "I feel" statements, i.e "When you say you're not sure I can get that report done on time, I feel like you're telling me I'm bad at my job." If you explain your feelings and your coworker continues this pattern, forward these emails to your boss and/or the human resources department and make an official complaint. -
QuestionI have a co-worker who seems to think seniority is equal to skill, and thus bosses me around even though we have the same position and are both equally skilled. How do I explain the flawed logic?
Community AnswerRemind this person that you are equals and to focus on their own work. If need be, talk to a higher-up and have them step in. -
QuestionMy coworker is suposed to be my backup. When she reminds me that I forgot something I get stressed. She is looking at Pinterest and telling me I forgot something? What the heck?
Community AnswerGently tell her to mind her own business. Say, "We each have our deadlines, let's just focus on completing our own work on time."
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QuestionHow do I deal with bad coworkers?
Community AnswerRise above hate, listen, and take on board what they tell you. If you feel they are discriminating against you, talk to them or a supervisor in private.
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QuestionHow do I stop my coworkers from bringing drama to the workplace?
Community AnswerIgnore all details pertaining to their story and continue your tasks until your shift is over. Their outlets are not within the workplace, but where their problems started.
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QuestionHow can I deal with a coworker who is trying to take my position?
Community AnswerTry to step up your game. Work harder. Maybe even try learning different skills to give you a one-up on them.
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