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This article was co-authored by John Keegan. John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.
There are 8 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
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Ah, love—sometimes just the thought of your girlfriend is enough to put butterflies in your stomach. If you’re thinking about asking her to hold hands, you may feel a little nervous. The good news is there are things you can do to ask her in a way that feels natural and makes her feel comfortable. To make it a little easier for you, we’ve put together a helpful list you can use when you do ask her to hold hands.
Steps
Expert Q&A
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QuestionIs there a right way I should hold my girlfriend's hand?
John KeeganJohn Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.
Dating CoachThere are a lot of different ways you can try. If you're walking, loosely hold their hand without squeezing too hard. If you're sitting next to each other, you can sandwich her hand between both of your hands to show your affection even more. -
QuestionHow do I let go without being rude?
Community AnswerLike the article said, you could easily give her/his hand a light squeeze and let go as a way of saying, "This was nice, but it's time to let go." Another way is to slowly but surely loosen your grip around his/her hand. When you loosen your grip, they will most likely do the same and you can let go. -
QuestionIf I slightly touch someone's hand, will they hold hands with me?
Community AnswerThere's a good chance they will if they like you and/or if you're in a relationship with them. For example, your boyfriend would probably take that as a hint to hold your hand, but if you're sitting next to a friend and you do that, they'll probably just think you touched them on accident.
Tips
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Some people have different views about things like holding hands. Try talking to your girlfriend to see how she feels about it.Thanks
Tips from our Readers 
- If you've already held hands in private but never in public, she may not be ready for that yet. Don't be offended! She'll let you know when she's ready.
- Sometimes a silly one-liner works well! For example, "Your hand looks heavy. Want me to hold it?"
Warnings
- Always respect your girlfriend’s wishes when it comes to physical contact. Never try to touch her or hold her hand if she’s not okay with it.Thanks
References
- ↑ https://pandagossips.com/posts/5187
- ↑ https://www.datingadvice.com/for-women/how-to-get-a-guy-to-hold-your-hand
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201110/reading-basic-body-language-dating-and-persuasion-success
- ↑ https://www.datingadvice.com/for-women/how-to-get-a-guy-to-hold-your-hand
- ↑ https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-5959229/Should-men-ask-consent-hand-holding-kisses.html
- ↑ https://datingarmory.com/how-to-hold-a-girls-hand/
- ↑ https://datingarmory.com/how-to-hold-a-girls-hand/
- ↑ https://www.datingadvice.com/for-women/how-to-get-a-guy-to-hold-your-hand
- ↑ https://www.datingadvice.com/for-women/how-to-get-a-guy-to-hold-your-hand
- ↑ https://pandagossips.com/posts/5187
- ↑ https://pandagossips.com/posts/5187
- ↑ https://www.datingadvice.com/for-women/how-to-get-a-guy-to-hold-your-hand
- ↑ https://datingarmory.com/how-to-hold-a-girls-hand/
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201401/seven-types-physical-affection-in-relationships
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/lifetime-connections/201806/romantic-rejection-why-does-it-hurt-so-much
About This Article
Asking your girlfriend to hold hands for the first time can be scary, but by following a few simple tips you can make it a special moment. Try to be someplace special the first time you hold hands so it doesn’t feel awkward or abrupt. For example, don’t reach for her hand during math class or in a noisy cafe where there are TVs blaring. While you’re chatting, try touching her shoulder when she says something funny or moving closer to hear her better. If she moves away, respect her space and don’t try to hold hands just yet. However, if she doesn’t move away, then this is a great sign that she’ll hold hands. When you’re ready, try asking her directly to show her that you respect her. For example, look into her eyes and tell her “I really want to hold your hand. Would that be ok?” You can also try moving your hand closer to hers. If she keeps her hand in the same spot or moves it closer to yours, then try taking hold of her hand. To know when it’s time to let go of her hand, keep reading!
Reader Success Stories
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"This helped me a lot! I'd love if you could do more articles about how a girl can hold a girl's hand, and the same thing about kissing and stuff."..." more
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