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Confidence is all about harnessing your own unique, internal power. It's what allows you to wow friends, dazzle parties, excel in school and work, and ultimately, just feel great about yourself—but when you struggle to feel secure, how can you become the most confident you? It's actually way easier than you'd think. Below, we've outlined the very best research-backed tips and tricks to help you on your journey. Ready to let that inner light shine through? Let's get started.

1

Challenge your negative thoughts

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  1. If you notice a negative thought, question it to see if it’s actually true. When you start to question your negative self-talk, you can adjust your thinking over time.[1]
    • For example, if you think something like, “My friends probably don’t like me,” try asking yourself, “Is that true? Didn’t my friend just invite me to hang out last week?”
    • Or, if you think something like, “I’ll never pass this test,” ask yourself, “How do you know? Can you tell the future?”
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4

Be honest with yourself about your shortcomings

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5

Make a list of your positive qualities.

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  1. [5] Start with 5 things that you like about yourself and try to add something to the list every day. If you can’t think of anything, try asking your loved ones what they like about you to get you started.[6]
    • For example, you could write, “I’m kind, I’m loving, I’m passionate about art, I’m creative, and I’m a good friend.”
    • However, this confidence-boosting method doesn’t work for everyone. Some people struggle to take these statements seriously or feel embarrassed by them.
    • Reader Poll: We asked 288 wikiHow readers, and only 10% prefer to reaffirm their self-worth by reflecting on their positive qualities and accomplishments. [Take Poll]
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7

Get help from a mental health professional.

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  1. They’ll be able to find the root of your low confidence so you can challenge your thoughts and break any negative thought patterns. A mental health professional can also help you work toward other goals, like improving your relationships or making changes in your life.[8]
    • If you’re a college student, check out the mental health resources on campus. You might be able to see a mental health professional for free.
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8

Spend time with people who appreciate you

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  1. Instead, spend time with friends and family members who inspire you and push you to be your best self. You’ll know someone is good to be around if you feel excited and happy to hang out with them.[9]
    • People who lower your confidence might make disparaging remarks about you or tell you that your goals are dumb. It probably feels draining to hang out with them, and you might be subconsciously avoiding them.
    • If you want to make a new group of friends, try joining a club to meet people interested in a hobby of yours.
10

Exercise regularly.

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About This Article

Guy Reichard
Co-authored by:
Life Coach
This article was co-authored by Guy Reichard and by wikiHow staff writer, Hannah Madden. Guy Reichard is an Executive Life Coach and the Founder of HeartRich Coaching & Training, a professional life coaching and inner leadership training provider based in Toronto, Ontario, Canada. He works with people to create more meaning, purpose, well-being, and fulfillment in their lives. Guy has over 10 years of personal growth coaching and resilience training experience, helping clients enhance and transform their inner worlds, so they can be a more positive and powerful influence on those they love and lead. He is an Adler Certified Professional Coach (ACPC), and is accredited by the International Coach Federation. He earned a BA in Psychology from York University in 1997 and a Master of Business Administration (MBA) from York University in 2000. This article has been viewed 205,612 times.
26 votes - 88%
Co-authors: 26
Updated: August 7, 2024
Views: 205,612
Article SummaryX

To become more confident, take a few moments every morning to look at yourself in the mirror and say something encouraging that you believe to be true about yourself or that you hope to be true someday. For example, tell yourself "I am an intelligent person." Also try writing confidence boosting notes to yourself that you will see throughout the day, like "You're doing a great job!" Finally, take good care of yourself by getting enough rest, eating a healthy diet, and surrounding yourself with positive people. If you want to learn more from our Licensed Counselor co-author, like how to identify times that affect your confidence, keep reading the article!

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Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 205,612 times.

Reader Success Stories

  • Kat Tolle

    Kat Tolle

    May 3, 2021

    "I regularly question my self shame like the first example shown, but I still feel like I shouldn't have those..." more
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