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Getting the cold shoulder from someone never feels good, especially when it’s someone you love. Usually if someone is giving you the silent treatment, it's because they feel hurt or upset. If you’re on the receiving end of being ignored, check out a few ways you can break the silence and have a productive conversation with your loved one.

1

Approach the person.

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  1. If you’re being ignored, try reaching out to see if they respond. You could send them a text, call them on the phone, or even approach them in person.[1]
    • Say something like, “Hey, I noticed there’s some space between us lately and I was wondering if we could talk about it.”
    • If someone is planning to give you the silent treatment for a while, they might not respond to texts or calls right away. Give it a little bit of time to see if they respond back.
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2

Reach out one more time if you don’t hear back.

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  1. If you reach out to your loved one and you don’t hear back within a few days, you can shoot them another text or try them on the phone again. After that, though, it’s time to wait until they reach out to you again.[2]
    • Try saying something like, “Hey, I haven’t heard back from you. I’d really like to resolve this but I can’t do it on my own. Would love to talk sometime this week.”
    • Be compassionate and let them know you still care, even if they still don't respond. Try saying something like, "Even though you're not up for connecting for me right now, I'm still here for you, and I hope we can talk again when you're ready."[3]
3

Listen to what they have to say.

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5

Be respectful when talking to your loved one.

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9

Concentrate on yourself.

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About This Article

Lena Dicken, Psy.D
Co-authored by:
Clinical Psychologist
This article was co-authored by Lena Dicken, Psy.D and by wikiHow staff writer, Hannah Madden. Dr. Lena Dicken is a Clinical Psychologist based in Santa Monica, California. With over eight years of experience, Dr. Dicken specializes in therapy for anxiety, depression, life transitions, and relationship difficulties. She utilizes an integrative approach combining Psychodynamic, Cognitive Behavioral, and Mindfulness-based therapies. Dr. Dicken holds a BS in Integrative Medicine from the University of Hawaii at Manoa, an MA in Counseling Psychology from Argosy University Los Angeles, and a Doctor of Psychology (Psy.D) in Clinical Psychology from the Chicago School of Professional Psychology at Westwood. Dr. Dicken’s work has been featured in GOOP, The Chalkboard Magazine, and in numerous other articles and podcasts. She is a licensed psychologist with the state of California. This article has been viewed 135,155 times.
1 votes - 0%
Co-authors: 5
Updated: July 8, 2024
Views: 135,155
Categories: Relationship Issues
Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 135,155 times.

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