This article was co-authored by Imad Jbara. Imad Jbara is a Dating Coach for NYC Wingwoman LLC, a relationship coaching service based in New York City. 'NYC Wingwoman' offers matchmaking, wingwoman services, 1-on-1 Coaching, and intensive weekend bootcamps. Imad services 100+ clients, men and women, to improve their dating lives through authentic communication skills. He has a BA in Psychology from the University of Massachusetts Dartmouth.
There are 8 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
This article has been fact-checked, ensuring the accuracy of any cited facts and confirming the authority of its sources.
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If there's a guy you're crazy about, it's only natural that you would want him to be crazy about you, too. Every guy is different, of course, but there are a few common tricks and techniques you can try that just might accomplish your goal.
Steps
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Make eye contact. It sounds simple, but making and holding eye contact with a guy can give him just enough encouragement to take an interest in you.[1]
- When you're talking to him, make sure that you maintain eye contact. Try not to let your eyes wander, especially in the direction of another guy.
- You can even use eye contact to drive him crazy when you're standing on opposite sides of the room. Make eye contact with him, and after holding it for a few moments, drop your gaze. Slowly drag your eyes back up to meet his again, keeping a coy or flirty smile on your face as you do.
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Dress yourself up.[2] It's the inside that counts, of course, but the outside gets seen first. When you're trying to make a guy crazy early on, wear clothes, makeup, and accessories that highlight your best features.
- This does not mean that you should wear especially revealing or tight-fitting clothes. Revealing clothes will catch a guy's interest temporarily, but they probably won't drive him crazy for very long.
- A dress that shows a little leg or a blouse that hugs your body in all the right places can work wonders, but your appearance should scream “attractive” more than “sexy.”
- The idea is to make your body and your face look its best. If the clothes are something you objectively look amazing in even when you're not trying to capture a guy's heart, they will probably work for this goal, as well.
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Dress down.[3] After you've gotten to know the guy, it's time to drop your guard and pull out the casual clothes. This tells him that he has successfully broken through the barricade and wedged his way into your life.
- The clothes you wear should still be clean, of course. A relaxed pair of jeans and a t-shirt make a nice casual look, but a shirt that's three sizes too big with a giant mustard stain on it may not be the best choice.
- After you've established a habit of dressing down, you should still dress up occasionally to reignite a few of the sparks he initially felt the first time he saw you.
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Wear a signature scent. Spray a little perfume behind your ears or apply a scented lotion after a shower. When you smell alluring, it can make a guy want to move in even closer to you.
- Moderation is key here. The scent should be just strong enough to waft gently in the air. If your perfume is too strong, it can easily overpower his sense of smell and make him want to put some distance between you.
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Dance. Plenty of guys go crazy for a girl who feels comfortable enough in her own skin to break into the occasional random dance.
- You can do this at a party or a club, but it's even more effective if you randomly start dancing to the radio when you're in your kitchen or in your car.
- Try inviting him to dance along with you, as well. Watching you can be enjoyable, but being invited to join the fun can also drive him wild.
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Play with your hair. When you know he's watching, twirl your hair between your fingers as you speak or casually flip it over your shoulder as you're working on something. Make the action look as natural as possible, though.
- If your hair is short or pulled back, you might consider brushing your hands against the nape of your neck or your bare shoulders, instead. This motion can be just as sensual.
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Balance independence with dependence. You need to show him that you're capable of being independent, but at the same time, you also need to make sure he knows that there's a place for him in your life.
- If the guy in your life will be busy on the weekend, don't plead with him to make a little time for you. Instead, accept it, and come up with plans of your own to talk about.
- Don't be too aloof, though. If he has you in his arms, that's not the time to start checking your texts or talking about your other friends.
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Demonstrate self-confidence. Let him see the side of you that is certain about who she is and where she's at. Even if you don't have your life completely worked out right now, there is usually some aspect of it that you can be proud and confident about.[4]
- Maybe you're self-conscious about the fact that you're not as far in your career as you'd like, or about the fact that you're relatively inexperienced with romance and love. On the other hand, you might be very confident about your intelligence, the relationships you've built with your friends and family, or any other number of accomplishments.
- If you lack confidence in one area of your life, highlight the areas of your life you do feel confident in rather than fixating on the things you perceive to be flaws.
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Respect yourself. Respect your body, your free will, and your life. Treating yourself poorly sends the signal that you don't deserve anybody else's serious attention, even when it is not true.[5]
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Show him a different side.[6] Once he's gotten to know you a little, show him a side of you that he has never seen before. The surprise will make him realize that there's far more to you than meets the eye, making you seem more mysterious.
- If you're usually the stern, serious type, let him see you laughing uncontrollably at your favorite comedy film or unwinding after a hard day of work.
- Conversely, if you're usually the carefree type, get serious with him one day and tell him a little of your dreams and fears.
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Learn to laugh at yourself. You will inevitably make a mistake in front of him. Instead of getting upset about it, brush it off and poke fun at yourself.
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Show your intelligent side. A ditzy girl might make a guy interested for a night, but a clever girl will challenge his mind and keep him going crazy for a much longer period of time.
- You don't need to pretend to be knowledgeable about things you've never heard of. Respecting your intelligent side simply means letting your natural cleverness show. Don't try to make yourself seem like an airhead.
- Remember—admiration is the key to attraction. If a guy really admires the woman that he's talking to, there's a higher chance of a relationship happening.[7]
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Encourage him to chase you. Most guys prefer to be the one doing the wooing, rather than the one being wooed. He needs to know that you're interested, but you shouldn't let him think that you're desperate to hold onto him.[8]
- Make him work to get closer to you. “Close” here means both physical and emotional intimacy. Let your guard down him emotionally by only revealing your inner thoughts and feelings little by little. Instead of taking him back to your apartment the first night, leave him with nothing more than a kiss—if even that—and make him have to prove himself before things go any further than that.
- Respond to his texts with flirty messages, but don't come off as too eager or willing at first. For example, if he asks you out to dinner, you could say "Do you really think that you can win me over with that cute smile and charm? You're gonna need to do more than that."[9]
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Make him miss you. Even if you never want to leave his side, it can actually hold his attention more if you leave long enough and often enough for him to miss your presence.
- Be unavailable from time to time. Instead of jumping at every invitation, pass one up, especially if he extends it with short notice. Make sure that you follow your refusal with a line about how much you'd love to do something next time.
- Make him a little jealous, but do so with caution. Hang out with a few of your female friends and talk a lot about the fun you plan on having. Avoid doing this with guy friends, though, since it might give him reason to doubt your sincerity toward him.
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Let him be himself. Don't ask him to change for you. No one is perfect, and if you're in a relationship with a guy, there will be things that both of you need to fix and compromise on. None of these things should include a dramatic change to his personality or beliefs, though.[10]
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Love his loved ones. Be friendly with his friends and ask about his family. By showing an interest in the people he cares about, you demonstrate that you are serious about being a part of his life.
- You don't need to be best friends with his friends, but it helps if you can tolerate them well enough to spend time around them when necessary. Try not to get too close to any of them, though, since you might spark some unwanted jealous and suspicion.
- If he's not on good terms with his family and doesn't have much interest in talking about them, don't push the matter too much. Bring it up every now and then, but wait until he's ready to start talking before talking in any depth.
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Take an interest in his hobbies. There's nothing that says you need to love every hobby he loves, but you should at least take enough interest in it to either try it or let him talk to you about it.
- If he invites you to try his hobby, give it a shot, even if you know nothing about it. You may choose not to continue with it after that first try, but at least you'll know enough about it afterward to understand him when he starts talking about it later.
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Compliment him sincerely. Offer a positive, flirty remark on how great he is when he least expects it. Flattery can be a powerful tool.[11] Make sure that your compliment is genuine, though, and not sarcastic.
- Compliments on his appearance can be just as effective as compliments on his personality or abilities.
- Mix things up a little. When you meet him after work, you might lean over and whisper that you couldn't stop thinking about his dreamy eyes all day. The next week, you might casually remark that you don't know anyone else who can tell as great a joke or story as he can.
- Compliments like "I love how many sports you play," "I like how smart you are," and "I love the way you're able to take initiative" are all great options.[12]
- Remember—stroking a guy's ego is one of the most attractive things you can do.[13]
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Let him flaunt his masculinity. When the two of you are together, let him be the man. This doesn't mean that you have to be completely submissive, but it does mean letting him take the lead and showcase a few traits associated with his traditional gender role.
- If he holds the door open for you or offers you his jacket on a chilly night, for example, you should accept the gesture.
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Support him without suffocating him. Be a safe place for him to fall. When things go wrong, let him know that you will be there to support him emotionally and without judgment.[14]
- Conversely, you also need to give him space. You may find that he needs more personal space than you do. If he needs time to be independent or time to deal with his issues alone, let him have it without making a big fuss over the matter.
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Pay attention to him. A guy is more likely to go crazy for a girl when she lets him see that she's crazy for him, too. Pay attention to the things he says and does, then regurgitate this information later on to prove that you were listening.
- For instance, if he tells you about the pet dog he had when he was 12, you might bring it up in conversation later on.
- A simple way to demonstrate that you pay attention to him is to remember some basic facts: his birthday, the names of his siblings, and so on.
Expert Q&A
Video
Tips
References
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/cutting-edge-leadership/201404/5-secret-powers-eye-contact
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/attraction-evolved/201805/what-wear-first-date
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/attraction-evolved/201805/what-wear-first-date
- ↑ https://positivepsychology.com/self-confidence/
- ↑ https://psychcentral.com/blog/how-to-improve-self-respect
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/modern-dating/202008/why-being-yourself-is-your-best-option
- ↑ Imad Jbara. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 5 November 2019.
- ↑ Imad Jbara. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 5 November 2019.
- ↑ Imad Jbara. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 5 November 2019.
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/click-here-happiness/202009/what-are-the-5-love-languages-definition-and-examples
- ↑ Imad Jbara. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 5 November 2019.
- ↑ Imad Jbara. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 5 November 2019.
- ↑ Imad Jbara. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 5 November 2019.
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/magnetic-partners/202010/the-importance-shared-interests-in-relationships
About This Article
To attract the attention of a guy and make him fall for you, start off by flaunting some charm. You can add little things to your interactions that’ll grab his attention, like making and holding eye contact, dressing up around him, or wearing a signature scent. Once you’ve caught his attention, turn up the charm by showing him who you are. Confidently tell him about your interests and invite him to participate in your favorite activities. For example, if you paint you could invite take him to a painting class or art museum. Or if you play a sport, invite him to watch a game. Remember to stay true to yourself. You want him to go crazy for you, not a made-up version of you. Don't pretend to be interested in things you're not interested in, dress in ways that you don't like, or engage in activities you don't enjoy for the sake of a guy. To learn more about how to make a guy fall head over heels by making him happy and cared for, keep reading!