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How exactly do you make a guy feel sexy? Making your guy feel wanted and attractive can boost his confidence, strengthen your relationship, and heat up your love life. From gentle touches and a little extra attention to emotional connection, we’ve got all the hot tips to make your man feel desirable. Get ready to treat your guy right—and make him want you even more.

1

Compliment the way he looks.

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  1. Start simple by telling him you think he’s handsome or pointing out your favorite part of his physical appearance. Most guys aren’t used to getting compliments all the time, and some verbal validation from you will mean a lot![1]
    • Try squeezing his arms and saying something like, “I love how strong you are.”
    • Run your hands through his hair and say, “You know you’re hot, right?”
    • Casually drop a compliment in by wrapping your arms around him and saying, “Hey, handsome.”
2

Gaze into his eyes.

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  1. Every now and then, give him a flirty smile and hold his gaze for about three seconds. When you two make eye contact, it’ll release a flood of bonding hormones to bring you two closer together.[2] If you want a more intense eye contact exercise, try sitting across from each other and gazing into his eyes for 5 minutes.[3]
    • Let him catch you staring at him. If he asks what you’re doing just say, “Oh, I’m just staring at this super hot guy I’m dating” or “I’m just looking at the love of my life.”
3

Be physically affectionate.

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4

Give him a massage.

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  1. A massage can be sensual and relaxing. Pick a clean, quiet, clutter-free area for your massage. Then, put on some soothing music, break out the massage oils, and get started. You can keep the massage non-sexual or let it turn into hot foreplay—either way, your guy’s going to feel special.[5]
    • Heat up your massage oils beforehand by placing the bottle in a bowl of warm water or simply rubbing the oil between your palms.
    • Work in circular motions, kneading with your thumbs while applying pressure with other parts of your hands, like the side of your palm, the flat of your palm, and your fingertips.
    • Start softly and gradually apply more pressure. Make sure you ask him what feels good!
6

Be the one to initiate sex.

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  1. When you tell him how much you want him, you can make him feel desirable. Turn a cuddle session into something more, grab his hand and pull him into the bedroom. If you really want to make a guy hot for you, go all out by putting on silk or lace lingerie, playing some soft music, and dimming the lights in your bedroom.[7]
    • Slip your hand under his waistband and say something like, "Want to know what I'm thinking about right now?"
    • Ask if he's interested in something steamy with a simple, "Want to join me in the shower?"
    • Turn him on by opening up about your fantasies. Try saying, "I had this really hot dream the other night. Wanna hear about it?"
8

Send him hot or romantic texts.

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  1. Reach out at any time during the day to let him know you can’t stop thinking about him. Describe how much he means to you, how much you miss him, and let him know you can’t wait to see him again. You can even send a good morning or goodnight text so he knows he’s the first and last thing on your mind.[9]
    • Make sure he knows you support him with an encouraging message like, “You’re sexy AND smart—I’m so lucky to have you in my life and I know you’ve got this today!”
    • Tell him when you miss him with a message like, “Thinking of you a little extra today. Wish I could 😚 you” or “I wish I could be in your arms right now.”
    • Tease him a bit with a sexier text like, “I can’t wait for tonight 🥰” or “Thinking about that night in Portland. Maybe we can do that again? 😉”
    • If you want, add a steamy pic to show him what he can look forward to.[10]
10

Write a list of things you like about him.

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  1. When you can boost a guy’s self-esteem and show that you “get” him and love him for who he is, he’ll automatically feel sexier. Write down the top 5-10 things you like about him and slip him the note as a surprise during the day. Bring up his best personality traits and talk about the connection you share.[12]
    • Let him know he’s the best dog co-parent, the world’s greatest frozen ravioli cook, or the best cuddler around.
    • Point out the cute quirks you love about him, like the way he pronounces “caramel,” the nickname he came up with for you, or the adorable way he folds his socks.
11

Tell him you’re proud of him.

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  1. Celebrate his wins, and the next time you’re together, look into his eyes and just simply say, “I’m so proud of you.” If you think he’d be comfortable with more public recognition, brag about his accomplishments in front of your friends or family when he’s around. Or, post a gratitude message on social media expressing how much you’re thankful for him and everything he’s done.[13]
    • “I think it’s pretty cool that I’m dating a guy who can fix his own car. I’m so proud of you, babe.”
    • “I know you work really hard, and I’m so proud of the way you’ve worked your way up in the company.”
    • “That was such a great game! I know you’re the MVP, but you’re my MVP too.”
12

Open up to him emotionally.

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Expert Q&A

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  • Question
    How do I win a man's heart?
    Connell Barrett
    Connell Barrett
    Dating Coach
    Connell Barrett is a Relationship Expert and the Founder and Executive Coach of Dating Transformation in New York City. Connell has over five years of experience as an international coach who helps men connect with women by unlocking their best, true, most confident selves. He is the author of the Amazon bestseller “Dating Sucks but You Don’t,” and has appeared on Good Morning America, the "Today" show, Access Hollywood, and in Best Life, Cosmopolitan, and The Oprah Magazine. In 2019 he was named Datezie.com's “New York City’s Best Male Dating Coach."
    Connell Barrett
    Dating Coach
    Expert Answer
    Give him compliments about his physical fitness, career successes, or his charisma to make fim feel good.
  • Question
    Where exactly should you touch him?
    Community Answer
    Community Answer
    You can touch him wherever feels natural, as long as he's comfortable with it, too. His stomach, neck, ears, and hair are all great places.
  • Question
    What if the guy is shy?
    Community Answer
    Community Answer
    If the guy is shy, you may have to start with subtler ways of making him feel sexy. Compliments, gentle touches, and eye contact are great ways to start. Make sure you communicate by asking him if he likes being touched in a certain way. You may want to avoid PDA.
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Tips

  • If you don’t feel comfortable trying out some of these steps, don’t worry. Everyone has their own way of making their partner feel sexy. Find what works for you.
  • Be authentic. If you ever feel like you have to act like a different person to make your partner feel happy, that’s probably not a healthy relationship.
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About This Article

Connell Barrett
Co-authored by:
Dating Coach
This article was co-authored by Connell Barrett and by wikiHow staff writer, Kira Jan. Connell Barrett is a Relationship Expert and the Founder and Executive Coach of Dating Transformation in New York City. Connell has over five years of experience as an international coach who helps men connect with women by unlocking their best, true, most confident selves. He is the author of the Amazon bestseller “Dating Sucks but You Don’t,” and has appeared on Good Morning America, the "Today" show, Access Hollywood, and in Best Life, Cosmopolitan, and The Oprah Magazine. In 2019 he was named Datezie.com's “New York City’s Best Male Dating Coach." This article has been viewed 368,907 times.
25 votes - 67%
Co-authors: 24
Updated: February 11, 2024
Views: 368,907
Categories: Affection
Article SummaryX

Making your man feel sexy is an important part of keeping your romance alive. Compliment his body and fashion sense when he looks good. For example, touch his chest and say, “You look so good in that shirt.” If he posts a selfie on social media, comment on it or message him privately to tell him he looks great. You can also look up and down his body when he’s watching you and give him a flirty smile to show him that you find him attractive. Pay attention to the things that make him feel sexy and focus on those the most. For more tips, including how to make a guy you’re crushing on feel special, read on!

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  • Christy Robertson

    Christy Robertson

    May 20, 2017

    "It's hard sometimes to find the right way to embellish in romance. Compliments seem like motives. Having kids..." more
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