This article was co-authored by Jay Reid, LPCC and by wikiHow staff writer, Eric McClure. Jay Reid is a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor (LPCC) in private practice in San Francisco, CA. He specializes in helping clients who have survived a narcissistic parent or partner. Treatment focuses upon helping clients identify and challenge self-diminishing beliefs as a result of narcissistic abuse. Jay holds a BA in Psychology from the University of Pennsylvania and an MS in Clinical Psychology from Penn State University.
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This article has been fact-checked, ensuring the accuracy of any cited facts and confirming the authority of its sources.
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If your boyfriend has been telling you what you can and can't wear, you may be feeling confused, taken aback, and hurt. It's never okay for anyone to tell you what you can wear, let alone your boyfriend. Everyone has the right to decide that for themselves. Keep reading to learn why it's a red flag when someone tries to tell you what to wear, plus how you can stand up for yourself and stop it from continuing.
Steps
Community Q&A
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QuestionWhat if he says the way I dress is disrespectful to him? Is that still okay or is he still in the wrong?Aria QuinnCommunity AnswerHave a conversation with him. If he's not being rude and you can understand his viewpoint, try to compromise to make sure neither of you are uncomfortable. That said, if he's being demanding and controlling over a very non-problematic wardrobe choice, that is not healthy.
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QuestionMy boyfriend glares at my chest and won't let me wear t-shirts even in summer. He says it's because of my bras. I feel so badly about myself. I have to wear hoodies 24/7 even in my own homeAria QuinnCommunity AnswerLeave him. Please. Never even letting you wear t-shirts is super controlling behavior, and if it's because you wear bras which is a totally normal thing for woman to do, he's immature. You're doing nothing wrong.
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QuestionMy boyfriend doesn't want me to wear skinny jeans and tight leggings because according to him it makes me look sexual and other guys looking at me might feel I want to be objectified.Annabella TianCommunity AnswerIt depends if you want to wear skinny jeans and tight leggings! If it makes you feel insecure about yourself when he makes those comments, you should either have a talk with your boyfriend or break up. If you like skinny jeans and tight leggings, then wear them!
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References
- ↑ Lia Huynh, LMFT. Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist. Expert Interview. 5 May 2022.
- ↑ https://www.cleveland.com/entertainment/2021/08/dear-annie-my-boyfriend-wants-me-to-stop-wearing-makeup.html
- ↑ Lia Huynh, LMFT. Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist. Expert Interview. 5 May 2022.
- ↑ https://www.glamour.com/story/husband-hates-makeup
- ↑ https://maisondureconfort.com/en/domestic-violence/test-do-you-have-a-controlling-partner/
- ↑ https://www.urmc.rochester.edu/encyclopedia/content.aspx
- ↑ https://www.glamour.com/story/boyfriend-asked-not-wear-bikini
- ↑ https://www.glamour.com/story/boyfriend-asked-not-wear-bikini
- ↑ https://madamenoire.com/508861/is-this-petty-boyfriend-fashion/