This article was co-authored by Rebecca Tenzer, MAT, MA, LCSW, CCTP, CGCS, CCATP, CCFP and by wikiHow staff writer, Hannah Madden. Rebecca Tenzer is the owner and head clinician at Astute Counseling Services, a private counseling practice in Chicago, Illinois. With over 18 years of clinical and educational experience in the field of mental health, Rebecca specializes in the treatment of depression, anxiety, panic, trauma, grief, interpersonal relationships using a combination of Cognitive Behavioral therapy, Psychodynamic therapy, and other evidence-based practices. Rebecca holds a Bachelor of Arts (BA) in Sociology and Anthropology from DePauw University, a Master in Teaching (MAT) from Dominican University, and a Master of Social Work (MSW) from the University of Chicago. Rebecca has served as a member of the AmeriCorps and is also a Professor of Psychology at the collegiate level. Rebecca is trained as a Cognitive Behavioral Therapist (CBT), a Certified Clinical Trauma Professional (CCTP), a Certified Grief Counseling Specialist (CGCS), a Clinical Anxiety Treatment Professional (CCATP), and a Certified Compassion Fatigue Professional (CCFP). Rebecca is also a member of the Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Society of America and The National Association of Social Workers.
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If you’re a human being, you’re going to make mistakes—there’s just no way around it. However, letting go of those mistakes can be tough, especially if you’re dealing with feelings of guilt or regret. It may take a little time, but you can learn to accept your mistakes and forgive yourself for what’s happened in the past.
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Expert Q&A
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QuestionHow do I stop worrying about past mistakes?Annie Lin, MBAAnnie Lin is the founder of New York Life Coaching, a life and career coaching service based in Manhattan. Her holistic approach, combining elements from both Eastern and Western wisdom traditions, has made her a highly sought-after personal coach. Annie’s work has been featured in Elle Magazine, NBC News, New York Magazine, and BBC World News. She holds an MBA degree from Oxford Brookes University. Annie is also the founder of the New York Life Coaching Institute which offers a comprehensive life coach certification program.
Life & Career CoachIt's important to recognize that your past mistakes cannot be undone. You only have control over the current moment. When you come to peace with this fact, it becomes a lot easier to be present. When you're present, you have total control of your mind and your decision-making. You can get closer to this state of being by meditating, exercising, and setting goals for yourself every day.
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Reader Videos
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Accepting your mistakes might not happen overnight. Keep plugging away to make chunks of progress over time.Thanks
References
- ↑ https://au.reachout.com/articles/how-to-get-over-making-a-mistake
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/focus-forgiveness/201410/how-forgive-yourself-and-move-the-past
- ↑ https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/the_healthy_way_to_forgive_yourself
- ↑ https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/the_healthy_way_to_forgive_yourself
- ↑ https://www.forbes.com/sites/amymorin/2017/07/17/5-ways-to-turn-your-mistake-into-a-valuable-life-lesson/?sh=4fed09321c01
- ↑ Rebecca Tenzer, MAT, MA, LCSW, CCTP, CGCS, CCATP, CCFP. Clinical Therapist & Adjunct Professor. Expert Interview. 2 October 2020.
- ↑ https://psychcentral.com/blog/8-ways-to-let-go-of-mistakes#3
- ↑ https://hbr.org/2019/02/how-to-stop-obsessing-over-your-mistakes
- ↑ Rebecca Tenzer, MAT, MA, LCSW, CCTP, CGCS, CCATP, CCFP. Clinical Therapist & Adjunct Professor. Expert Interview. 2 October 2020.
- ↑ Rebecca Tenzer, MAT, MA, LCSW, CCTP, CGCS, CCATP, CCFP. Clinical Therapist & Adjunct Professor. Expert Interview. 2 October 2020.
- ↑ https://au.reachout.com/articles/how-to-get-over-making-a-mistake
About This Article
To accept past mistakes, try to remember that they don't define who you are as a person. Instead, view each mistake as a new opportunity to learn and grow. For example, if you feel guilty about losing your temper with a friend or family member, see this as a chance to work on regulating your emotions in the future. Additionally, you can try to find a way to amend your mistakes, such as apologizing or returning money if you owe someone. For more tips from our Counselor co-author, including how to show yourself kindness after failures and accept your imperfections, read on!
Reader Success Stories
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"This article helped me to learn that the past is over and that I cannot change what happened in the past. I can think on how to do better for the future. It is wasting time when I think of what I could have done in the past. I do feel guiltily on some things I have done before but I can move forward and change what I do in the future."..." more