How to Find and Make Gaming Friends

Most games are more fun when you play with people you know and like. Plus, games are a great way to get to know other people and build lasting bonds.^{[1]
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Nonpartisan thinktank conducting research and providing information on public opinion, demographic trends, and social trends

Go to source} Try a few different methods of looking for gamer friends; you’re bound to get better at it the more you do it, just like a game!

Things You Should Know

Take note of players who you enjoy playing with, and send them a friend request or reach out to them when they're online again.
Use Reddit's r/GamerPals, or hop into a Discord server for your favorite game to talk to like-minded people.
Hang around game or special interest shops, or attend conventions to meet people in real life. Also, ask your existing friends to acquaint you with new people.

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Making Friends During Gameplay

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Remember users you enjoy playing with. Remember or write down the username of a gamer you enjoyed playing with. This way, if you see them again, you’ll be able to recall aspects of their playing that you like, or, if they mentioned something specific while playing, you’ll be able to talk about it with them.
- Compliments are a great way to reach out for the first time. If you liked a strategy that someone used, or noticed a great move they made, let them know. Saying something like "great shot!" may not seem like much, but it lets them know that you've noticed them.
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Reach out when you see them online. Message a user you've enjoyed playing with and ask them if they'd like to play again. Consider logging in around the time of day when you last played with them, in order to increase your chances of seeing them online.
- Many games offer the ability to “friend” another player, which will notify you when they’ve logged into the game. This way you can see when your new friend is playing and invite them to play with you at any time.
- Say something like, "Great game yesterday! Wanna play another one?"
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Make plans to play with each other later. If you want to be formal, you can ask someone if they’d like to play again soon, nailing down a date and time for another game. This can be a good way to strengthen beginning friendships. Try phrases like:
- “I enjoyed playing with you! Want to play again sometime soon?”
- “You’re good at this. Want to play another one?”
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Remember to keep it casual. While you might be looking for lifelong friendships, they might just barely be interested enough to play another round with you. Don’t ask for personal information straightaway, and never give up personal information unless you feel safe doing so.
- If you ever feel unsafe while talking to another user (if they're asking for personal information, such as your full name, telephone number, mailing address or other sensitive information), block them or stop talking to them.
- Only offer personal information if you think it will help your friendship grow, and won't be used in a devious way by another person. For example, if your friend gives you their first name and asks yours, it's probably not too much to give them your name. You could even give a pseudonym. However, if the same person asks which street you live on, where you go to school, or where you work, it's not a good idea to give up that information.
- If your friend ever wants to meet in person, be sure to have a phone or video chat with them beforehand, so you can verify who they are. Avoid alcohol while meeting up, as this can cloud your judgment and lead to an unsafe situation.

Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Using Social Media and Apps

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Use Reddit’s r/GamerPals to find gamer friends. Make a post on r/GamerPals telling subscribers what game you want to play and what timezone you’re in. This subreddit is devoted exclusively to finding people online to play with. It has more than 23,000 subscribers, and you can ask people to play whatever game you’re currently playing.^{[2]
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- You'll have to sign up for Reddit to make a post on r/GamerPals.
- Post titles typically include age, sex, location, timezone, and the game you want to play (e.g. 28/M/US, CST, looking to play Far Cry 5).
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Find groups on Facebook. Search for the game you want to play in Facebook’s search bar, then press the "Group" button to filter by group only. Oftentimes, multiple groups are available for each game. Just click the “Join Group” button, and you’ll be added by a moderator. From there, you can start posting in the timeline to see who wants to play.
- Avoid suggesting that you’re looking for “friends,” as this can make people think you’re looking for a big commitment. Instead, simply say that you’re looking for someone to play today or tomorrow. Keep it relaxed and informal.
- Try something like, "Hi everyone, looking for someone to play Far Cry 5 with, 5pm CST tomorrow! Does anyone want to play?"
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Use apps and websites to find gamer friends. There are many apps and websites that you can access on your computer, tablet, or phone to reach out to new gamer friends. To find more, try searching "game chat app" or "find gamer friends online" in your favorite search engine.
- The app Gamr2Gamr lets you search for games other users are playing. When you find a user you’re interested in, you can send them a friend request and start playing together.
- GamerLink is an app that fallows you to post on a game forum and specify exactly what you’re looking for (e.g., “I need a tank and a healer”). When players respond to your post, you can add them to a friend list and ask them to play again later.^{[3]
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- Find Gaming Buddies is a website that offers lists of users sorted by game. Just click on a game and sort through the people who are currently playing that game. You can send a message through the website asking people to play.
Try using Discord. "I've found that a lot of gamers use a messaging app called Discord. Most games, in fact, have an official Discord server that you can join and meet people through! With my friends, Discord is my primary method of communication when gaming. They've got voice channels that you can use to talk during the game which are super useful." Damon, video gamer for 12 years

Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Finding Gamer Friends Offline

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Go to your local game store and ask what people play. Head over to your favorite video game shop and ask the people who work there what they’re playing. If it’s the same game that you love to play, consider asking them if they’d like to play with you. Tell them outright that you’re looking for someone. Try phrases like:
- "I’ve been looking for some people to play with on Call of Duty. Would you be interested in playing together sometime?”
- "I love Call of Duty and I’m trying to get better at it. Do you want to play together sometime soon to help each other improve?”
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Use meetup.com to find groups of gamers. Go to meetup.com and check out the different options for video game groups in your area.^{[4]
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Research source} Meetup is a website where you can find different groups of people to "meet up" with in real life. The site has many different topic filters, such as:
- Online Gaming
- PC Gaming
- Multiplayer Gaming
- Video Games
- Console Gaming
- Once you've chosen a topic, scroll to the bottom and select "Show all." Then click "Find a Meetup Group near you." The site will show all the relevant groups meeting near you.
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Find gamers at gaming conventions. Attend a gaming convention, which is bound to be full of like-minded gamers. Strike up conversations with people and ask what they like to play. If you find out someone enjoys the same game as you do, don’t be afraid to ask if they’d like to play sometime:
- "I’ve enjoyed talking to you! Would you be interested in playing Call of Duty together sometime?”
- "You seem like a nice person. Want to play Call of Duty online sometime, after the convention is over?”
- Run a search for gaming conventions in your area by using search terms like "gaming conventions in San Antonio" or "gamer conventions in New York."
If you have friends who play video games, ask them if they know people who might want to play with you. They might have gaming friends themselves they'd be willing to introduce you to.

Having Conversations with Gamers

Ways to Reach Out to Other Gamers Online

Striking up Conversations with Other Gamers in Person

Community Q&A

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Question

What if my friend blocks me?

Community Answer

Try to connect with them in person or over the phone (in person would be easiest) and ask them why you've been blocked. Ask if they're mad at you for any reason. If they say yes, try to resolve the conflict. If not, ask politely if they could unblock you.

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Question

What if nobody else wants to play agar.io with me?

Community Answer

That is okay, not everyone wants to play the same thing, not everyone likes agar.io. Find other games to play with your friends and find some friends online who want to play agar.io with you. Use the tips in the steps above to find new gamer friends.

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Question

When I become friends with somebody, I am always left out from them. Even if it is my BFF. Any tips?

Gamer Noko

Community Answer

Try making a few more gamer friends, and make sure you stay with the ones who actually do join and play with you. If the other ones don’t continue playing with you, you shouldn’t be afraid to ‘unfriend’ them.

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