How to Respond to Dry Texts from a Guy

Enticing texts to send that will get the reply you want

Written by Julianne Cantarella | Edited by Aimee Payne, MFA

Last Updated: October 15, 2024 Fact Checked

You’re texting a guy you like, and he starts sending one-word texts, takes forever to respond, or doesn’t respond at all…classic signs of dry texting. While this may mean he’s not super into you, don't assume right away. It might only mean you just have to change up your texting strategy a bit. We’ll walk you through the best texts to send to fix a dry conversation, check his interest, and figure out when to leave the conversation (thanks to expert tips from professional dating coach and licensed social worker, Julianne Cantarella). Read on for a list of ways to respond when a guy sends you a dry text!

Best Ways to Respond to a Dry Texter

Pinpoint the reason behind his dry texting.
Restart the conversation by bringing up his interests.
Use a playful question to fix a texting rut.
Mention a fun memory to remind him of your connection.
Send a photo to give you more to talk about.
Send him a flirty text to see if he’s still interested.
Check how he feels about texting.

1

Figure out why he’s dry texting.

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He might be busy, he might not like texting, or he might not be into you. Dry texting is incredibly frustrating, but try to be patient for the first couple of short texts or long response times. If he starts the conversation up again or starts sending more detailed messages, he was probably just busy. However, if you notice a pattern of dry texts, ask yourself these questions to figure out if he’s into you:
- How often does he initiate the conversation? If you’re the one consistently sending the first message, he may not be interested in you. That’s his loss!
- How does he communicate in real life? Is he a chatty guy or more reserved? He might be a shy guy or an introvert who doesn’t feel like engaging in small talk. Try out a few of the conversation starters below to try to pique his interest.
- Has he ever sent longer texts? He might be having a bad day if his texts have gone dry. Think back to the last time you interacted, too, and ask yourself if you did anything to upset him. If not, give him some space and see if he starts texting again.
- When do his texts usually go dry? For instance, do his texts get shorter when you bring up a certain subject? He might prefer talking at a certain time of day or about certain subjects. Shake up the conversation to get him to text back with better responses.

2

Mention something he’s interested in.

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He might dry text you if he’s not feeling the conversation topic. Come up with an irresistible conversation topic to hit the ball back into his court by getting him talking about his interests. Use an open-ended question, and keep it pretty broad, especially if you don’t know him well. It’s even better if you find a common interest and start a conversation from there!^{[1]
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- “If you had 48 hours to do whatever you wanted, what would you do?”
- “What’s something you’ve always wanted to try but haven’t?”^{[2]
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  Greater Good in Action
  An initiative by UC Berkeley's Greater Good Science Center promoting science-based practices for a meaningful life
  
  Go to source}

3

Get him texting again with a playful question.

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He might just not be in the mood to talk about school, work, or his day. A fun question helps add a little spark and turn your conversation into a game. See if he’s up for a real game like truth or dare, or “would you rather?” If not, just send one of these easy, fun questions:^{[3]
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HelpGuide
Nonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources.

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- “If you could have 3 wishes right now, what would they be?”
- “Would you rather travel to the future or to the past?”
- “What’s something you love that everyone hates?”

4

Remind him of a fun time you spent together.

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Start a text with something like “Remember that time when we…?” If you’ve met in person or have been on a few dates, use that common experience or an inside joke to reignite the spark. When you go without seeing each other for a bit, it’s normal for a text conversation to dry up because you’re not actively creating new memories together. While you wait for your next date, start up a text conversation by reminding him about the good times you had in real life.^{[4]
X
Research source} Here are some texts for inspiration:
- “Just passed that diner we like and thought of you! Remember when we ordered that massive milkshake?”
- “I was just thinking about the way that woman stared at us when we burst out laughing in the movie theater the other night. What was the line that made you totally lose it?”

5

Send an interesting photo to spark a conversation.

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Take a pic of something exciting or interesting from your day. A photo can shake up the rhythm of your conversation, especially if his replies are getting boring. Just steer clear of sending private photos unless you know you’re both comfortable with that.^{[5]
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Research source} Check out these example ideas of photos to send:
- Snap a beautiful photo in nature.
- Take a photo of a tasty-looking meal.
- Do something silly and take a picture.

6

Gauge his interest with a little flirting.

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If he responds positively, you don’t have anything to worry about. Plus, once the positive vibes are flowing, he’ll be more likely to respond with longer, more interesting texts. Send a flirty emoji and tell him you’re looking forward to seeing him, or send a compliment text. If he’s interested in you, he’ll probably flirt back or at least respond with something fun.^{[6]
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Research source} Check out these examples:
- “You looked really cute last night.😉”
- “You’ve got the best sense of humor.😝 I’m still thinking about that joke you made at Madison’s party.”
- “Hey, handsome! What are you up to?😚”

7

Check in with him about his feelings regarding texting.

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Your guy might prefer to text a bit less, or he might not like texting at all. When you’re texting with a guy you like, it’s worth checking his comfort levels and preferences. Some guys send dry texts because they aren’t fans of texting, so keep in mind a dry text doesn’t immediately mean that your guy doesn’t like you, Cantarella says.^{[7]
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Expert Source

Julianne Cantarella
Dating & Relationship Coach

Expert Interview. 6 August 2021.} Try replying to a dry text with something like this:
- “Thoughts on texting vs. talking in person?”
- “Hey, how do you feel about texting?”
- “What’s your fav way to reach people? Are you more of a texting or calling kind of guy?”

8

See if he’s down to call or video chat.

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Use this question to see if he’s actually interested in you. Dry texting is an annoying and confusing way for guys to signal they’re not into you, especially if your guy says no to other forms of communication. Cantarella advises that if he says no to calling or video chatting, move on!^{[8]
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Expert Source

Julianne Cantarella
Dating & Relationship Coach

Expert Interview. 6 August 2021.} Send one of these to figure out whether it’s time to leave the conversation:
- “I’m feeling old school tonight. Want to call?”
- “I miss seeing your handsome face. Want to video chat?”
- “Texting can get boring. Wanna call instead?”
EXPERT TIP

Julianne Cantarella
Dating & Relationship Coach
Julianne Cantarella is a Dating Coach, Certified Life Coach, Licensed Social Worker, and the CEO and President of New Jersey's Matchmaker. With over a decade of experience, she specializes in helping women heal from a heartbreak and create healthy long-term relationships. Julianne created a comprehensive transformational date coaching program From First Date to Soulmate™ that has helped hundreds of women find love. She holds a Bachelor of Social Work (BSW) from Ramapo College of New Jersey and a Master of Social Work (MSW) from Fordham University. Julianne has contributed to numerous media such as Your Tango Online Magazine, 24Seven Wellness Magazine, and Talk of The Town Magazine. She has also been featured as a relationship expert on CBS, iHeartRadio, and PBS “This Emotional Life Project.”

Julianne Cantarella
Dating & Relationship Coach

Don’t use texting as your main form of communication. I am someone who really frowns on texting. I’ve found that once you eliminate texting as your main form of communication, you can get to a face-to-face meeting. That’s when you see if someone is really right for dating.

9

Ask if he wants to hang out IRL.

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Figure out if he likes you by being direct. Let him know that you’re interested in him. Cantarella advises that if he says yes, you’ll know he’s serious about meeting up. If he says no, move on to better texting convos. After all, texting someone you like should be fun!^{[9]
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Expert Source

Julianne Cantarella
Dating & Relationship Coach

Expert Interview. 6 August 2021.}
- “Hey, I like you. Would you want to go out sometime?”
- “I like talking to you. Wanna grab lunch after class on Thursday?”
- “Do you want to hang out sometime?”

10

Prevent dry texting by sending more specific questions.

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Try asking him a question that gets him thinking. “What was the highlight of your day?” is a much more engaging alternative to “How’s it going?” It makes him think about his day and what he really enjoyed about it. Steer clear of “yes”/“no” questions that let him respond with a one-word answer. By getting specific and changing up a pretty standard question, you’ll get a better answer from him.^{[10]
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Research source} Plus, by asking about the highlight from his day, you get a sense of what matters to him and what his passions are. From there, it’s easier to build deeper conversations.
- People pick up their phones an average of 58 times a day.^{[11]
  X
  Trustworthy Source
  
  PubMed Central
  Journal archive from the U.S. National Institutes of Health
  
  Go to source} If he doesn’t respond after several hours, he’s likely seen your text but isn’t interested.

11

Tell a dry texter what kinds of texts you like.

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Use this approach for a guy you’re already dating. He might not realize that his dry texts bother you! If you’re just getting to know each other, you’re both figuring out what makes the other person happy. This an ideal strategy to text with him after the first date. Give him compliments when he responds with longer texts, and tell him what you’d prefer when it comes to his texting style. Try to find a way to communicate that makes you both comfortable.^{[12]
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- “I always smile when I get a notification from you.”
- “I like getting texts from you! It’s always fun to talk.”
- “I really appreciate it when you text me to check in before you go to sleep.”

12

Don’t respond at all if he keeps dry texting.

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Cantarella says, “One-word texts or dry responses don’t show a ton of interest—and that lack of effort is rude if he sends dry texts all the time. You don’t have to reply when a guy sends you dry texts or doesn’t look like he’s doing his part to keep the conversation flowing.”^{[13]
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Expert Source

Julianne Cantarella
Dating & Relationship Coach

Expert Interview. 6 August 2021.}