How to Tell if a Girl is Bored of Texting You: 14 Common Signs

Figure out if a girl is no longer interested in texting

Co-authored by Joshua Pompey and Cory Stillman

Last Updated: August 30, 2024 Fact Checked

Scoring a girl’s number is exciting, but it isn’t always smooth sailing. It can be really tough to know where you stand, especially if you can’t talk or hang out in person. In this article, we cover the most common signs that a girl is bored or tired of texting you. We've also included a few helpful tips to keep her engaged via text!

1

She doesn’t reply.

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Replying to you shows that she wants to keep chatting. Does she forget to reply to your messages a lot, or does she answer pretty frequently? If she’s bored, she might not bother replying to your texts, and then make up a lot of excuses about why she didn’t reply.^{[1]
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- Listen to her excuses and see if they’re genuine. Reasons like “I was at work” or “I was in class” are pretty solid, while “I was busy” seems pretty vague.

2

You do most of the texting.

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Are you both talking equal amounts, or are you talking 80% of the time? According to experts, unbalanced conversations are a key sign that the other person is feeling bored.^{[2]
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3

Her texts are vague.

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Vague answers show a definite lack of interest. While an occasional vague text isn’t the end of the world, constantly vague messages are a red flag. If she doesn’t take the time to write out a thoughtful reply, she’s probably bored.^{[3]
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- One-word answers like “okay” or “cool” are prime examples of vague texts.

4

Her messages mirror yours.

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Bored people tend to repeat statements instead of saying something new. Read over some of your recent texts, and see how she replied to your messages. If she repeats what you sent without writing an original response, she’s probably bored.^{[4]
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- For instance, if you sent something like, “It’s snowing outside,” she might reply with, “Yeah, it’s snowing outside.”

5

She asks basic questions.

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Simple questions show a lack of interest. Pay attention to her replies when you talk about your day. See if she asks specific questions, or if her replies are on the general side. If she’s bored, she probably won’t put too much thought into her texts, and rely on basic questions.^{[5]
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- Texts like “Where did you go?” or “What did you do?” are vague.
- Keep in mind that it can be really hard to pick up on somebody's tone or intentions through messages—that might just be how she texts.

6

She changes the topic quickly.

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Changing the subject shows that she’s not paying attention. In a really engaged conversation, your conversation will build off a single topic. If you’re texting about your weekend plans and she replies with a random question or segues into a different topic without any explanation, there’s a good chance that she was bored of the original conversation.^{[6]
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- For example, if you were texting about your favorite TV show and she randomly messages you about Spanish homework, she probably wasn’t listening to whatever you told her.

7

She doesn’t set aside time to talk.

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Any kind of friendship or relationship involves making time for others. If she’s really interested in chatting with you, she’ll find the time to do it, even if your schedule is jam-packed. If she isn’t willing to talk to you at any point during the week, there’s a good chance that she’s bored of you.^{[7]
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- Some people might not text much during the week, but text more on the weekend to make up for it. If she never seems to have time to talk, she probably isn’t interested in carrying on a conversation.
- Scroll through your chat history and see who usually starts up the conversation. It’s definitely a red flag if you’re always sending the first text.
- Reader Poll: We asked 897 wikiHow readers about why they would stop texting their crush first, and only 9% of them said if their crush only texts first when they want something. [Take Poll]
  - People generally see short replies and long delays between texts as a lack of interest, so they might be more likely to stop texting first when they notice these behaviors, instead.

8

She never asks for more information.

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Follow-up questions are key to a good conversation. These questions prove that she’s really interested and tuning in to what you’re saying. If she never seems to care about anything you’re sending, there’s a good chance that she’s bored of the conversation.^{[8]
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- If you’re talking about your weekend plans, she could ask questions like “What are you most looking forward to?” or “Do you go there a lot?”

9

She ends the conversation often.

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If she's always cutting your conversation off, she's not engaged. Worse, these attempts can make you less comfortable texting her in the future. And if you don't feel comfortable reaching out, it may be a sign the relationship is not built to last.
- If her attempts to end the conversation are clearly and respectfully communicated, there may be no cause for concern. There is a difference between saying "I have to go" and "I'm a little busy, can we talk later?"

10

She leaves you on read.

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Frequent read receipts usually means she isn't feeling it. You can drive yourself crazy paying too much attention to your read receipts, but the harsh reality is that anybody who really cares about you would not read your text and leave it without a response.
- A girl can leave you on read every now and then, as she may be too busy to type out a response. But if it is a persistent issue, she is likely bored of texting you.
- Be careful not to send too many follow-up texts. Of course, you can still follow up if you want to keep the conversation going.
  - Check out this wikiHow guide for tips on how to restart a conversation.

11

She uses only emojis.

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Emojis can often indicate that a girl is interested in you, but if her texts consist of strictly emojis and nothing else, there may be cause for concern.

12

She's always on her phone when you're together.

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If you struggle to maintain conversation with a girl when you are apart, but you discover that she is frequently on her phone when you are together, that is evidence that she is simply choosing not to text you back.

13

She flakes when you make plans.

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Inconsistent texting can be overlooked, but not when making plans. Texting is just one aspect of a relationship, but it is crucial to text clearly and consistently when you and your partner are setting up a date. If she bails on your plans, or is reluctant to set something up, she is likely not interested in you.
- When having important or logistical conversations, consider having a phone call with a girl instead.

14

She avoids calling you.

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A phone call shows that she wants to do more than just text. You can have a lot of fun conversations over text, but a phone call allows you to get deeper and have more extended conversations. If a girl only wants to text, and avoids talking to you on the phone, she may not feel comfortable with you.
- Be sure to give a girl time and space as she gets to know you. If you just met a girl, you should only text for a while. A phone call or an in-person date will come in time, so long as you allow your connection to develop organically.

Expert Q&A

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Question

Can you get to know someone over text?

Imad Jbara
Dating Coach
Imad Jbara is a Dating Coach for NYC Wingwoman LLC, a relationship coaching service based in New York City. 'NYC Wingwoman' offers matchmaking, wingwoman services, 1-on-1 Coaching, and intensive weekend bootcamps. Imad services 100+ clients, men and women, to improve their dating lives through authentic communication skills. He has a BA in Psychology from the University of Massachusetts Dartmouth.

Imad Jbara

Dating Coach

Expert Answer

It's really hard for somebody to understand your texting until they meet you in person, because everybody has a specific way of texting, and a unique sense of humor. If the person doesn't know you, you might say something and it might be a joke, but it could come off the wrong way. It also really takes away from the spontaneity of the conversation, because you're carefully crafting each message.

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Tips

Don’t be afraid to switch things up! Keep your texts unique and interesting, so your conversations don’t get boring. You might ask her a few get-to-know-you questions during one chat, and tell a story during another.^{[9]
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Body language is one of the best ways to tell if someone is bored. If you’re able to safely meet up in person, take a closer look at her posture—if she’s turning away and doesn’t seem very focused on you, it’s safe to assume that she’s disinterested.^{[10]
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Don’t feel bad if a girl is bored of texting you. The sooner you know, the sooner you can focus on people who are excited and happy to chat with you.

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Warnings

Don’t text the same thing every day. Messages like “hi,” “hey,” or “what’s up” can become pretty repetitive and boring.^{[11]
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Give her time to get back to you. If she doesn’t reply within a few minutes, that doesn’t necessarily mean she’s bored—she might be busy, or not quite ready to reply.^{[12]
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Let go of the idea that you have to be in constant communication. Ongoing conversations are nice and important, but some time away from each other won't be a detriment to any relationship that is built to last!

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