This article was co-authored by Imad Jbara. Imad Jbara is a Dating Coach for NYC Wingwoman LLC, a relationship coaching service based in New York City. 'NYC Wingwoman' offers matchmaking, wingwoman services, 1-on-1 Coaching, and intensive weekend bootcamps. Imad services 100+ clients, men and women, to improve their dating lives through authentic communication skills. He has a BA in Psychology from the University of Massachusetts Dartmouth.
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So you've got a girl's number, but how do you start a convo that'll get her attention? Texting can be a great way to break the ice and get your crush interested in you. The trick is to take your openers beyond a basic “hey” and ask interesting questions that’ll get her to respond. Fortunately, flirting and talking to a girl over text doesn’t have to be rocket science. With pro tips from one of our expert dating coaches, we’ll walk you through the whole process of texting the girl you like with a list of easy conversation starters.
Steps
Sample Conversation Starters
Attract Girls and Win Their Hearts with this Expert Series
Expert Q&A
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QuestionShould I text a girl I just met, or call her?Imad JbaraImad Jbara is a Dating Coach for NYC Wingwoman LLC, a relationship coaching service based in New York City. 'NYC Wingwoman' offers matchmaking, wingwoman services, 1-on-1 Coaching, and intensive weekend bootcamps. Imad services 100+ clients, men and women, to improve their dating lives through authentic communication skills. He has a BA in Psychology from the University of Massachusetts Dartmouth.
Dating CoachI think a lot of the magic and spontaneity of conversation is lost when you're not having an organic chat. There's nothing wrong with texting if you're just trying to break the ice or you're too nervous to talk, but I think you're more likely to make progress if you give her a call! -
QuestionWhat if I already told her how I feel about her and things just got more awkward but we are still talking, How do I start a conversation when things are a little awkward then?Community AnswerStill talk to her to show that you aren't afraid of confessing and getting rejected. Just pretend everything is normal now.
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QuestionDoes a girl like if I know a lot of things about her?Community AnswerNot if she hasn't told you. That might just come of as creepy! You should try to remember the things she tells you though because you'll prove you are a good listener.
Video
Tips
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Flirting can be cute, but can also be annoying or off-putting if done at the wrong time. While flirting, pay close attention to her responses. If she is sending flirty messages back and responding quickly, this is a good sign. If she seems disinterested or even a little worried, slow down and go back to casual conversation.Thanks
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Do not over-text. It can break the relationship. Be relaxed and chat with her when she is not busy. Over texting will make her feel that you are only interested in chatting and you don't want to meet her personally.Thanks
Warnings
- Be smart about what you text. Remember that texting creates a written and sometimes photographic record that you cannot delete. Never text anything that you wouldn't want to get into the wrong hands, whether because the recipient forwarded or shared the message or because her phone was stolen or lost.Thanks
References
- ↑ Imad Jbara. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 5 November 2019.
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/intimately-connected/202004/how-far-people-will-go-to-impress-a-potential-partner
- ↑ https://positivepsychology.com/communication-in-relationships/
- ↑ https://positivepsychology.com/appreciative-inquiry-process/
- ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/mental-health/benefits-of-play-for-adults.htm
- ↑ https://positivepsychology.com/positive-reinforcement-psychology/
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201112/break-the-ice-how-talk-girls-and-guys-0
- ↑ https://www.scienceofpeople.com/how-to-ask-someone-out/
- ↑ https://psychcentral.com/blog/the-psychology-of-waiting-in-lines-8-reasons-that-the-wait-seems-long
About This Article
To start a conversation with a girl over text, try bringing up something relevant or timely so you’re not just texting her “hey” out of the blue. You could text her something like, “Hey, I’m super stoked for the game tonight—are you going?” or “It was so crazy running into you at Starbucks today!" or you can even text “I can’t get over what Mr. Smith said in English class today.” Another great option when you’re texting a girl first is to ask her an open-ended question, like “Are there any good movies you’d recommend watching?” Or “I’m bored of all my music—do you have any good recommendations?” or “I need food but I don’t know what to make—any suggestions?” Or you can send her a funny video or picture you found online paired with a “I can’t stop laughing” or “This is totally me.” Once she responds, keep the conversation going by asking about her interests. “What does your ideal Friday night look like?” could be an example. You can also share any interesting stories that happened to you recently (“You’ll never believe what happened to me the other day…”), and maybe asking if she wants to hang out sometime (“I’ve never been there before, but maybe we should go sometime!”). For tips on how to know if she’s not interested in texting, keep reading!
Reader Success Stories
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