How to Tell if a Natural Flirt Likes You

Co-authored by Eddy Baller

Last Updated: July 23, 2024

Falling for someone who is naturally flirtatious can be confusing - you may be able to tell they're flirting with you, but is it because they like you, or because they flirt with everyone? Or does their attention mean they want to pursue a deeper relationship with you? While it can be tough to work out a flirty person's true intentions, this article will help you notice signs that they might be hoping to become more than friends.

Method 1

Method 1 of 2:

Noticing How They Act

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1
Notice if he becomes nervous or suddenly quiet around you. One way to tell if a flirt really likes you is if he doesn't flirt with you. If he's a natural flirt, he's probably not putting too much thought into his actions when he's friendly with other people--that's just how he is. But if he clams up when you are near, acts fidgety and nervous and not really like himself, it could be because he is now very aware of his actions and is overthinking everything.
- Watch him interacting with a group of people, then walk up and say hi. See if his behavior changes--if he gets quiet, tones down his goofiness, or doesn't say much but keeps glancing at you.
- See if one of your friends will join the group and try to embarrass him a little--nothing mean, just a small joke at his expense. If he blushes or gets embarrassed when he'd normally take the joke in stride, it might mean he doesn't want to look bad in front of you.
- If you make him nervous, he may continue to be very friendly with other girls and appear to ignore you or be less friendly toward you.
- Not every flirty person becomes nervous when around their crush, so if they're not suddenly getting shy, it doesn't necessarily mean they don't like you. They might be the type that will give you more attention instead.
2
Watch her movements when you're together and see if they mirror your own. If she's interested in you, she will subconsciously copy your body language.^{[1]
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Research source} When you're hanging out, try crossing your legs and see if she does the same a few seconds after. Take a drink of water and watch for her to also take a sip.
- Mirroring a person's actions is a way to bond, get comfortable with each other, and send the signal that you like the other person, even if you're not even aware you're doing it.^{[2]
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- If you decide to try this in reverse - mimicking her movements so she will subconsciously feel comfortable with you--make sure you don't follow too closely or precisely. Wait a few seconds before mirroring her actions. If she picks up on what you are doing, she may think you're mocking her and the effect will be ruined.^{[3]
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3
Look for lots of eye contact. Try to notice if she's constantly glancing at you across the room or when you're in a group, then blushing or glancing away when you catch her looking. When you're having a conversation, notice if she starts looking into your eyes as though she's studying them. Prolonged eye contact or a lot of quick glances in your direction indicates she's interested in you.^{[4]
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Expert Source

Eddy Baller
Dating Coach

Expert Interview. 7 February 2020.}
- To see if she likes you, try holding her gaze while you're flirting. If she seems uncomfortable and looks away quickly, she's probably not interested in anything romantic. But if she stares back at you, it's a good sign that she's into you.
- You can find out if she's watching you by taking a small action, like appearing to look at something strange out the window. If she's watching you, she won't be able to help but look out the window, too.
4
Get into a group situation with him and see if he pays more attention to you. When you're with a lot of other people, does he seem to pick you out of the crowd? When you're having separate conversations with other people, does he suddenly chime in, alerting you that he's been paying more attention to what you're saying than the person he's talking to? If he likes you, he will constantly be looking for ways to be near you and interact with you.
- Go out to dinner in a group and see if he makes sure he's sitting next to you.
- Try to hang out a few times in group setting, and notice if he makes a point to come talk to you each time.
- Go to a party and try to stay until the end. If he hangs around with you long after most people have gone, he probably went to the party just to talk to you.

Quiz

wikiHow Quiz: Does My Crush Like Me?

Having a crush is the best thing in the world—except when it’s the worst! All those lovey-dovey butterflies can quickly turn into nervousness. Suddenly, you're stuck analyzing their every move, wondering whether or not they like you back. Luckily, we’ve got the perfect quiz for you! Answer these questions, and you'll learn to identify the secret signs that your crush is into you, so you can stop worrying and start loving. Take this quiz to finally get your answer!

1 of 20

Does your crush follow you on social media?

Totally—they tag me in posts and always comment on mine with inside jokes.

Yep. We don’t interact publicly, but I get sooo many DMs of memes from them.

Yeah, we like each others’ posts but that’s it.

No, they never accepted my follow request.

Method 2

Method 2 of 2:

Noticing What They Say

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1
Start using a word a lot and see if he begins saying it, too. It doesn't have to be anything very obvious--maybe you start saying "y'all" instead of "you guys"--and notice if it starts popping up as part of his vocabulary. This is a way of subconsciously signaling you are on the same wavelength and try to get you to like him. ^{[5]
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- If you have a slight accent, he may begin mirroring your accent without realizing it.^{[6]
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2
Evaluate the depth of your conversations. Does she always keep things very light, with a lot of joking and talking about movies or a difficult assignment--subjects she'd probably discuss with anyone? Or has she begun to confide in you a little bit, telling you more personal things or getting really deep into her beliefs or hopes for her future? If so, she wants you to take her seriously and to build a deeper connection with you.^{[7]
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Expert Source

Eddy Baller
Dating Coach

Expert Interview. 7 February 2020.}
- If she looks upset or you know she's had a bad day, make a point to let her know you're available to talk, and see if she confides in you.
- If conversations are somewhat surface, but she gets over-the-top excited when you have things in common, she's still trying to connect with you. So when your chat about movies reveals you both love Jason Statham and she is overjoyed, she's showing that she's a good match.^{[8]
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3
Find out if he's been asking or talking about you. Ask your friends if your name has come up in conversation and see if they can find out from his friends if he talks about you a lot. If he likes you, he's going to be curious about you and what makes you tick. So if he randomly asks your friend who is on her way to basketball practice "Oh, isn't [your name] on the team, too?", he's very interested in you.
- If it turns out your name often comes up in conversation--maybe relaying something funny or interesting you said--it's a sign that you're on his mind.
- He may even tell mutual friends that he's really interested in getting to know you, hoping they'll tell you.

Join the Discussion...

How do you tell if someone's being flirty or friendly?

39

WikiCaveWatcher554

Hey everyone! I would really love some help figuring out how to tell if someone is flirting with me, especially when it comes to reading body lan... Read More

4

John Keegan
Dating Coach

Examples of flirting would be lots of eye contact and smiling, being curious about your relationship status, and specifically asking to do someth... Read More

3

WikiGladeLeaper631

Totally agree with all of that. Also, ask yourself these two questions: are they going out of their way to be flirty/friendly/interact with you?... Read More

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Tips

Try to spend a lot of time around them. If it seems like they're paying more attention to you than they are to anyone else, they probably like you.

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If they repeatedly go out of their way to start a conversation with you, that's a pretty good sign that they're interested. You might also see if they make eye contact with you as they walk past or while they're talking to someone else.

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