This article was reviewed by John Keegan and by wikiHow staff writer, Amy Bobinger, BA. John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.
There are 13 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
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Curious if your crush is crushing back? Have you been hanging out with a guy and wondering does he like me? We're here to help you figure it out! Read on for all the signs a guy likes you, from his body language and the way he talks, to the way he texts you and treats you. We've even got advice on how to find out from his friends, ask him directly, and drop hints about your own feelings.
Steps
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See if he makes eye contact with you when you're around. If you notice the guy looking you in the eyes, try meeting his gaze with a smile, and hold it for a few seconds. If he doesn't look away, he might be interested in you, especially if he smiles back.[1]
- Keep in mind that this can just be him acknowledging you, or he may be in the habit of looking everyone in the eye.
- On the other hand, some guys are really shy when they like someone, so he may actually make eye contact less often if he's really into you.
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Pay attention to whether he smiles around you. When you like someone, you can't help but smile when they're near. If the guy you're around always lights up as soon as he sees you, it could mean that he has a crush on you![2]
- He could just smile at you because you're friends, so be careful not to jump to conclusions.
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Watch whether he mirrors your behavior. If you're talking to a guy or hanging out with him as part of a group, you might notice that whenever you touch your face or your hair, he does the same thing. Subconsciously mirroring someone else's behavior is a sign that you're attracted to them, so that could be a good clue that he's into you.[3]
- To try this out, try repeating a small movement, like brushing your hair off of forehead or straightening the hem of the shirt, then watch whether he does the same thing.
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Observe whether his body and feet are angled toward you. Without realizing it, we tend to lean toward people we like, and we lean away from people we don't like. When you're talking to the guy in question, watch whether he turns his body toward you or away from you.[4]
- You can also watch whether his feet are pointing toward you, which can be another sign that he's interested.
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Ask yourself whether he seems nervous or awkward when you're around. Sometimes, guys can get a little bashful when they like someone. If you notice that a guy blushes, stammers, or gets quiet when you come around, he might have a crush on you, although he could just be naturally shy.[5]
- If you notice a guy doing this and you like him too, try giving him a little smile or a touch on the arm to reassure him. It may help set him at ease.
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Watch whether he finds excuses to touch you. If a guy is always ready with a hug, he frequently touches you on your arm or shoulder, or he looks for reasons he can by physically close to you, he might like you. However, he might just be a touchy person, so pay attention to whether he acts like that with other people. If you're the only one, he probably has a crush.[6]
- If a guy ever makes you feel uncomfortable by touching you or pressing close to you, firmly tell him to stop and step away from him. Don't worry about hurting his feelings. If he's a decent guy, he'll apologize and avoid doing it again in the future. If it continues, stay away from him.
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Pay attention to whether he's always willing to hang out with you. If the guy in question is always there for you when you need him and always down to spend time together, he might have a crush on you.[7] Ask yourself whether he's willing to cancel plans with other friends if you need him, or if he tries to make time for you even when it's inconvenient.[8] [9]
- This could also be the sign of someone who's just a really great friend. Either way, if you like him, enjoy the time together! His true feelings will come out eventually.
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Check whether he's following you on social media. If you notice that a guy constantly likes your posts or is following you across multiple social media platforms, it could mean that he can't get enough of you! Of course, if he's a social media butterfly, it might not mean anything, but if he's not super active, it's a good sign he's into you. [10]
- Don't overanalyze his social media behavior. It's easy to decide that one "like" on Instagram means he's your soulmate, but you'll drive yourself crazy if you read that much into it.
- If he mostly messages you online but doesn't talk to you much in person, he's probably feeling shy and trying to get to know you better, or he may even be working up the courage to ask you out.
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Watch to see if he texts you out of the blue. If a guy texts you for no reason, it's a sure sign that you're on his mind—and it might mean that he has feelings for you. He might also look for excuses to text you, like asking you about a homework assignment that he seemed to understand in class.
- Try not to text the guy too often. That way, he'll have a chance to be the one who texts you first.
- If you and the guy are good friends, he might just want to talk. Remember, you're looking for clues that all add up to a big picture.
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Pay attention to whether he opens up to you over time. As you get to know the guy better, he might start to reveal personal details about his life and his past.[11] If he's comfortable being emotionally vulnerable with you, it's a good sign that he feels close to you, and it may mean that he has deeper feelings for you as well.[12]
- For instance, he may tell you about problems he's having with his parents or siblings, or he may talk about a difficult past relationship. Also, check if he makes an effort to get to know you better.[13]
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Watch whether he gives you gifts or does things for you. Guys often express their feelings through their actions, rather than their words. If he gives you a little gift "just because" or he looks for reasons to help you with things, it could be a sign that he wants a closer relationship with you.[14]
- For instance, if you mention being cold and he offers you his sweater, he might just be chivalrous, but he also may be feeling protective over you because he cares about you.
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See whether he teases or compliments you. Guys often gently tease the person they like, but they may also give compliments. However, some guys tease all their friends, while others are generous with compliments, so pay attention to how he treats other people to see if the way he acts around you is different. If you're the only one he does it to, it's a good sign he's into you.[15]
- For instance, if you dress up for work, he might say, "You look nice" when you walk up. On the other hand, he might say something like, "Whoa, are you trying to get a promotion or something?"
Warning: If a guy teases you in a way that makes you grin and blush, that's cute. However, it's NOT okay if he puts you down or makes you feel bad about yourself. If that happens, he's not the kind of guy you want to get into a relationship with.
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Ask your friends what he says about you when you're not around. If your friends spend time around the guy in question, see if they'll help you figure out how he really friends. For instance, you could ask them to bring you up when you're not around, and see if he has anything to say.[16]
- For example, your friend might say, "I think Jamie looks really nice today. Sam, what do you think?"
- If he jumps on the chance to talk about you, he probably has a crush. If he rolls his eyes or says anything unkind, he probably doesn't.
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Talk to his friends if you're not ready to ask him yourself. If you really want to know what he's thinking but you haven't quite worked up the courage to ask, try asking his closest friends. Of course, they're probably going to tell him as soon as they talk to him, but it can give you a little insight.
- You might try saying, "Hey, Stephen, I was wondering if Chris likes me. We hang out a lot, but I'm too shy to ask him."
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Be straightforward and ask him if you want a definite answer. Being honest and upfront is usually the best approach.[17] Chances are, if you ask a guy up-front about his feelings, he'll probably tell you. However, try to do it when it's just the two of you, because if he feels put on the spot in front of other people, he might feel too embarrassed to answer.[18]
- If you're hanging out with a group of people, you might say something like, "Hey Damon, will you walk with me to get a drink?" When you're out of earshot, you could say, "Lately I've been wondering where we stand. Do you like me as more than a friend?"
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Tell him your feelings for an indirect approach. If you're ready to find out for sure what the guy is feeling but you don't want to just come out and ask him directly, find a time when the two of you are alone, and let him know how you feel about him. If you tell him that you like him, he'll probably tell you whether he feels the same or not.[19]
- If you'd rather keep things platonic, you might say, "Hey Josh, I just wanted to tell you... We've been hanging out a lot, and you're a really great friend. But, some of my friends think I have a crush on you, and I don't see you that way. I just wanted to let you know."
- If you like him, try saying something like, "So, I'm not sure exactly how you feel, but I like you a lot, and not just as a friend."
Tip: If you're a male and you're not sure if your crush is into other guys, you may need to first discreetly find out if he's gay.
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Send him a note or text if you're feeling shy. Sometimes talking to someone in person can seem intimidating. If you're having trouble working up the courage to ask him, try writing him a note or sending him a text, instead. That way, you can plan out exactly what you want to say, and he'll have time to think about his response, too.[20]
- Try keeping it short and sweet by saying something like, "I really like you, and I was wondering if you like me too?"
Ways to Ask a Guy if He Likes You
How Do You Tell If Someone Likes You?
Community Q&A
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QuestionHow can you tell if a guy likes you over text?wikiHow Staff EditorThis answer was written by one of our trained team of researchers who validated it for accuracy and comprehensiveness.
Staff AnswerwikiHow Staff EditorStaff AnswerText can be tricky because you can’t see his body language or hear his tone of voice. Look for signs that he’s being flirty, like playful emojis or friendly, chatty responses. He may not be into you if he replies to your texts with a lot of 1-word answers (like “yeah” or “ok”). -
QuestionHow can you get a guy to admit he likes you?wikiHow Staff EditorThis answer was written by one of our trained team of researchers who validated it for accuracy and comprehensiveness.
Staff AnswerwikiHow Staff EditorStaff AnswerThe best way to do that is to have an honest conversation with him. If you feel comfortable enough, you can just ask him outright. Say something like, “Do you like me as more than a friend?” If you’re interested in him, tell him how you feel and see how he responds. -
QuestionCan I figure out if he likes me without talking to him?wikiHow Staff EditorThis answer was written by one of our trained team of researchers who validated it for accuracy and comprehensiveness.
Staff AnswerwikiHow Staff EditorStaff AnswerWhile talking to a guy directly is the easiest way to find out where you stand, you can also look for other clues. For example, check out his body language and facial expressions when he’s around you. If you catch him looking your way and smiling a lot, he might be interested in you. You can also try asking his friends if you know any of them well enough.
Video
Tips
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Remember, while it's fine to try to figure out how someone feels by looking at the clues, the only sure-fire way to know if someone likes you is to ask them, so don't obsess over little things!Thanks
References
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/let-their-words-do-the-talking/201607/5-nonverbal-clues-someone-is-interested-in-you
- ↑ https://time.com/59786/how-to-flirt-backed-by-scientific-research/
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/let-their-words-do-the-talking/201607/5-nonverbal-clues-someone-is-interested-in-you
- ↑ Candice Mostisser. Relationship Coach. Expert Interview. 24 January 2020.
- ↑ https://www.theodysseyonline.com/10-ways-girls-can-tell-that-guy-likes-them
- ↑ https://time.com/59786/how-to-flirt-backed-by-scientific-research/
- ↑ Candice Mostisser. Relationship Coach. Expert Interview. 24 January 2020.
- ↑ https://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/advice/g2315/signs-he-likes-you/
- ↑ [v161898_b01]. 19 August 2021.
- ↑ https://hellogiggles.com/7-ways-shy-person-will-use-social-media-tell-theyre/
- ↑ [v161898_b01]. 19 August 2021.
- ↑ https://verilymag.com/2017/08/how-to-know-if-a-guy-loves-you
- ↑ [v161898_b01]. 19 August 2021.
- ↑ https://verilymag.com/2017/08/how-to-know-if-a-guy-loves-you
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/evolution-the-self/201210/flirt-vs-tease-whats-the-difference
- ↑ https://www.aconsciousrethink.com/8573/tell-someone-you-like-them/
- ↑ Candice Mostisser. Relationship Coach. Expert Interview. 24 January 2020.
- ↑ https://www.teenvogue.com/story/how-to-ask-someone-out
- ↑ https://www.teenvogue.com/story/how-to-ask-someone-out
- ↑ https://www.hercampus.com/sex-relationships/dating/how-ask-him-out-5-secrets-making-first-move
About This Article
To figure out if a guy likes you without asking him directly, start by looking at his body language and facial expressions. For example, if he makes eye contact and smiles whenever you look his way, that’s a good sign that he’s into you. You might also catch him leaning towards you when he’s talking to you, fidgeting or acting nervous around you, or even mirroring your gestures and facial expressions. A guy who likes you will want to be close to you, and if he’s feeling brave, he might find excuses to touch you lightly or brush up against you when you’re together. If you’ve gotten to know him a little, you can also look for other clues in his behavior. For instance, pay attention to whether he seems eager to hang out and spend time with you, or whether he often strikes up conversations with you or even texts you out of the blue just to say “hi.” You might also notice him dropping compliments, looking for ways to help you out, or surprising you with little gifts or other sweet gestures. Good-natured teasing is also a favorite form of flirting for many guys. If you’re pretty sure he likes you, but you aren’t ready to ask him yet, try asking his friends what he says about you when you aren’t around. If you find out that he’s been going on about how awesome you are, then he’s probably into you. You can also try talking to the guy directly. Say something like, “Hey, I love hanging out with you, and I’ve been feeling a real connection between us lately. Do you think we could be more than friends?” Or, “I really like you, and I was wondering if you feel the same way.” If he’s interested in you, he’ll probably be happy to let you know. For more ways to know if a guy likes you, like checking if he’s protective or nervous around you, read the article!
Reader Success Stories
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"It was Valentine's Day and I gave a card that said "Just wanted you to know....I have a soft spot in my heart for you." When he read it he smiled, but since that day he's been doing those things. We are pretty close friends, but I don't want to go further. Thank you for this advice!"..." more