How to Know for Sure if a Boy Likes You Before You Ask Him Out

Co-authored by Joshua Pompey

Last Updated: August 7, 2022 References

Asking someone out is nerve-wracking because it's hard to know whether or not they like you too. However, by noticing his body language and paying attention to what he says in conversation, you can easily tell if he likes you too. For instance, if he makes eye contact, teases you, or gently touches you, there's a good chance he is crushing on you too. Once you think he likes you, make your move!

Method 1

Method 1 of 2:

Deciphering His Body Language

Download Article

1
Catch him smiling or laughing around you often. If he likes you, he'll naturally smile around you all the time. He also may laugh or giggle at what you say to show he likes you.^{[1]
X
Research source} If he doesn't laugh at your jokes, he might not like you.
- If he breaks his facial expression to smile at you, this is often a sure-fire sign that he's crushing on you. For instance, his face may light up when you pass him in the hallway.
2
Notice how often he makes eye contact with you. If your crush likes you, he will make eye contact with you as often as he can. To test this out, look at him for 3-4 seconds and then look away. After a few seconds, take a peek to see if he’s still looking at you. If you catch him glancing your way, there’s a good chance he likes you.^{[2]
X
Expert Source

Joshua Pompey
Dating Coach

Expert Interview. 27 November 2019.}
- A shy guy may still like you even if he doesn't make eye contact often, so don't let this dissuade you.
Advertisement
3
See if he responds well to gentle body contact. To gauge how interested he is, touch him gently as a flirtatious suggestion. You can gently touch his shoulder, hand, or arm, for instance. If he stays in contact with you rather than flinching or moving, he's into it.^{[3]
X
Expert Source

Joshua Pompey
Dating Coach

Expert Interview. 27 November 2019.}
- Also notice if he finds excuses to touch you, like brushing your leg with his or finding a reason to give you a hug.
When you are sitting down, standing in a group, or passing each other, pay attention to how he positions himself around you. If he points his legs, feet, or toes in your direction when you hang out, there’s a good chance he likes you. It’s common to position your body in the direction of the person you like.^{[4]
X
Research source}
5
Take note if he seems shy, nervous, or fidgety when you're around. If he likes you, he may fumble over his words, get sweaty palms, or take deep breaths. This often happens because he's worried about making a good impression and whether or not you like him too.^{[5]
X
Research source}
- Guys typically don’t act nervous around people they don’t like.
6
Watch to see if he matches his walking pace to yours. When someone wants to connect with you, he may start walking at your pace naturally. For instance, if you are walking together, he may adjust his speed so you can walk together.^{[6]
X
Research source}
- Additionally, if he sees you from across the room or hallway, he may start to walk at your pace as you cross paths.
7
Watch for face touching or eyebrow-raising. If a guy sees someone they like, their blood often rushes to their face. As a result, he may touch or scratch his face someone he likes. In addition, he may raise his eyebrows slightly. If he does any of these motions, he is likely crushing on you too.^{[7]
X
Research source}
- These motions often happen quickly and soon after he sees you, so keep your eyes peeled.
- Also watch to see if he quickly glances away when you notice that he’s looking at you.

Quiz

wikiHow Quiz: Does My Crush Like Me?

Having a crush is the best thing in the world—except when it’s the worst! All those lovey-dovey butterflies can quickly turn into nervousness. Suddenly, you're stuck analyzing their every move, wondering whether or not they like you back. Luckily, we’ve got the perfect quiz for you! Answer these questions, and you'll learn to identify the secret signs that your crush is into you, so you can stop worrying and start loving. Take this quiz to finally get your answer!

1 of 20

Does your crush follow you on social media?

Totally—they tag me in posts and always comment on mine with inside jokes.

Yep. We don’t interact publicly, but I get sooo many DMs of memes from them.

Yeah, we like each others’ posts but that’s it.

No, they never accepted my follow request.

Method 2

Method 2 of 2:

Analyzing Your Conversations

Download Article

1
Listen for compliments as an indication that he likes you. If he says things like "You look great," or "Your dress is awesome," there's a good chance he likes you. He may compliment your appearance or personality. Pay attention to how often and what he compliments to get a sense of when to ask him out.
- For example, if you are in the same class, he may say "Wow, you're so smart," after you tell him the grade of your last exam.
2
Make a note of instances where he remembers what you say. If he often quotes things you've said in the past, he likely enjoys talking to you. Notice if he brings up a story you told before, a fun fact about you, or something about your family or friends. These are all signs that he is really listening.^{[8]
X
Research source}
- For example, he may ask you if you saw the latest sports game for your favorite team.
- He may also ask questions to get to know you better. For instance, if you mention you have a brother, he may ask if you have other siblings.
3
Note whether he mentions new things about your appearance. If he makes a comment about your new haircut, outfit, or makeup, this suggests he looks at you often and may like you too. Since he's noticed all of your features, he'll surely notice when you tweak something or make an upgrade.^{[9]
X
Research source}
- For instance, he may say "I really like your new shoes," or "Hey, since when do you wear purple lipstick?"
4
Pay attention to see if he expresses interest in things that you like. Over time, he may seem interested in your favorite TV show, movie, or band. If he asks you what you think of the new Red Hot Chili Peppers' CD or if you watched the latest episode of The Office, he may be trying to connect with you.^{[10]
X
Research source}
- For instance, if you tell him that Doctor Who is your favorite show and a few weeks later he starts talking about an episode, he may have a crush on you.
5
Keep tabs on how often he texts you and interacts via social media. If he sends you a "what's up?" text multiple times a week, he likely wants to chat with you and connect deeper. He may like your social media posts, send you messages, or tag you in funny comments. If he calls you on the phone, chances are he's into you.
- For example, he may send you a funny picture, interesting video, or neat article.
6
Look for instances of playful teasing. Guys often flirt by teasing, such as calling you a nickname or giving you a hard time. If he does things make fun of a silly thing you said, he probably likes you.^{[11]
X
Research source}
- For example, he may mock your tone of voice, inflection, or accent. He also may point out little details, like a stain on your shirt or how you often bite your lip when nervous.
- Notice if he flirts or teases with lots of other people. If so, this may not be a fool-proof sign.
7
Listen to see if he talks about himself often in conversation. If he likes you, he’ll likely talk about himself when he can. He may brag about himself as a way to impress you or tell you personal stories to keep you interested. If he makes it a point to add personal information to the conversation or tell you his thoughts or opinions, there’s a good chance he’s interested.^{[12]
X
Research source}
- For example, if he regularly tells you about his upcoming football games, he may want you to show up and watch.
8
Watch to see if his friends treat him differently around you. If a guy likes you, he may tell his friends, and they may heckle him over his feelings. If you notice his friends smiling at him, winking at you, or giving him a hard time, he may have confessed his feelings about you.^{[13]
X
Research source}
- For instance, his friends might start making kissing sounds when they notice him talking to you in the hallway.
9
Notice if he looks for your reaction first when with a group of people. When you’re in a group at school, an event, or at work, note his reaction when taking all together. If he says something and looks at you first, the aim of his story or joke was to get you to notice him. If this is the case, there’s a high probability he likes you.^{[14]
X
Research source}
- For example, perhaps you are chatting with a few friends at your locker in between class. After your crush tells everyone about his weekend plans, if he looks at you right away, he may want you to say something back.

Expert Q&A

Search

Add New Question

Question

How do you know if a guy likes you secretly?

Joshua Pompey
Relationship Expert
Joshua Pompey is a Relationship Expert and Founder of Next Evolution Matchmaking (NEM) based in New York City, NY. With over 15 years in the industry, Joshua helps his clients navigate online dating and has a success rate of over 99%. His work has been featured in CNBC, Good Morning America, Wired, and Refinery29 and he has been referred to as the best online dater in the world.

Joshua Pompey

Relationship Expert

Expert Answer

Number one, body language is key when somebody is looking at you. If they're smiling a lot and they're making eye contact, it's a good sign they like you. Also, look out for little touches on the arm, on the elbow, or on the back while you're talking. Those are tremendous signs of interest, so look out for any physical touches that you're receiving.

Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
Thank you for your feedback.
If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Support wikiHow
Yes No

Not Helpful 5 Helpful 29
Question

What if he is too scared to ask you out?

Community Answer

Try asking him out yourself! The worst that could happen is he could say no.

Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
Thank you for your feedback.
If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Support wikiHow
Yes No

Not Helpful 66 Helpful 166
Question

I asked my crush out for coffee with other friends, and he turned me down. However, the other day when we were talking, he pulled my arm back towards him. What does that mean?

Karley Snyder

Community Answer

He may be interested but nervous or not ready. In addition, he may want individual time with you instead of time with other friends. Try being his friend for a bit to see if he gives you any other flirty suggestions. If so, ask him out for coffee--just you two.

Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
Thank you for your feedback.
If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Support wikiHow
Yes No

Not Helpful 5 Helpful 50

See more answers

Ask a Question

200 characters left

Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered.

Submit

Tips

Never change who you are to impress a guy!

Thanks
Helpful 9 Not Helpful 2

Submit a Tip

All tip submissions are carefully reviewed before being published

Name

Please provide your name and last initial

Submit

Thanks for submitting a tip for review!

Warnings

Don’t take it personally if he says no when you ask him out. He may have just gotten out of a relationship or be very shy. Keep being his friend and maybe he’ll change his mind down the line.^{[15]
X
Research source}

Thanks
Helpful 2 Not Helpful 2