PDF download Download Article PDF download Download Article

It’s so exciting matching with a new guy on Tinder or Bumble, but how are you supposed to break the ice and make a good impression? Now that you’ve connected in the app, it’s time to learn more about him to see if you have potential as a couple. Luckily, we’re here to help you through your first conversation with him. Keep reading for a ton of advice and examples of what to say so you can find out if he’s your perfect match!

Dating App Message Ideas

  1. Ask about something he put in his bio to start a conversation.
  2. Compliment one of his photos to flatter him.
  3. Start an icebreaker, like Would You Rather.
  4. Ask him for advice based on his interests.
  5. Ask him an open-ended or profound question.
  6. Ask him what he's looking for on the app.
  7. Get his number or social media info to talk elsewhere.
1

Mention something from his profile.

PDF download Download Article
  1. Read through his bio and bring up any of the hobbies or interests he mentions. If he doesn’t give you a lot to work with in the bio, scroll through his pictures and look for anything exciting or intriguing that you can use as a conversation starter.[1]
    • For example, you could say something like, “Is that the Eiffel Tower in your photo? I’ve never been to France but always wanted to go! What was it like?”
    • As another example, you might say, “OMG is that your dog? It’s SO cute 🥺 How long have you had it?” Talking about pets is really easy and can get the ball rolling in no time.
    • If there’s nothing that attracts you on his profile, but he is still your type, you can always start a conversation about something generic like the weather or recent events.
    • Reader Poll: We asked 266 wikiHow readers how they initiate conversations with guys online, and 48% said they talk about something on his profile. [Take Poll]
  2. Advertisement
3

Ask him open-ended questions.

PDF download Download Article
  1. Open-ended questions require more than one-word answers so they’re great for getting a conversation started. You could ask fun questions to break the ice or personal questions so you’re able to learn more about him. Just be sure to answer any questions he has for you too so the conversation doesn’t feel one-sided.[3]
    • For example, fun questions you could ask include, “If you could only bring one thing with you to a deserted island, what would it be?” or “What are your favorite movies?”
    • Some more personal questions you can ask include, “What’s your favorite memory from growing up?” or “How did you like the most about your hometown?”
  2. Advertisement
5

Send a funny GIF.

PDF download Download Article
  1. A lot of dating apps don’t let you send your own pictures, but you can search for a GIF that matches how you’re feeling. Use the GIF search in the app to find one that will make him laugh or one that relates back to what you’ve talked about. Follow up with a quick joke to give him more to respond to.[5]
    • For example, you could send him a GIF of a scared cat and say something like, “I’m a little nervous to say hi, but I’m not like this scaredy-cat 😺”
    • As another example, if you’ve been talking about your favorite movies, you may find a GIF from your favorite scene and say, “This is my favorite part! What’s yours?”
  2. Advertisement
6

Tell him a joke.

PDF download Download Article
  1. Repeat a corny joke you heard, point out something that happened to you, or riff on something that he mentioned in his profile. Just try to stay away from making any sarcastic comments since it can be pretty hard to read over text and he might not know that you’re joking.[6]
    • For example, you could say something like, “I’m so tired of this lockdown but I can’t wait to lock you down 😉”
    • As another example, you might say, “Since you love bowling, let me get the ball rolling on this conversation so I don’t strike out!”
7

Ask him for advice.

PDF download Download Article
8

Share a personal story.

PDF download Download Article
  1. If the guy mentions something that you can relate to, talk about your story so you can bond over it more. If he has questions for you, be sure to answer them so he learns more about who you are.[8]
    • For example, you could say something like, “OMG that reminds me of the trip I took when I was younger…”
    • As another example, you might say, “Oh, something similar happened to me! One time…”
    • Mentioning embarrassing and funny childhood stories is always a great idea to keep the conversation going in a lighthearted way.
9

Flirt with him.

PDF download Download Article
  1. You’re obviously into the guy if you match with him, so be straightforward so he isn’t guessing how you’re feeling. Say something sweet or a little risqué to get his attention and let him know you want to be more than friends. Just make sure you wait and save sexting until you’re both comfortable and ready for it.[9]
    • For example, you could say something like, “The only thing that would make this movie night better is cuddling up next to you 🥰”
    • As another example, you might say, “You want to know who I really want to ask out? Read the first word of this message 😉”
    • That said, be careful not to be too straightforward, or you might end up scaring the guy.
  2. Advertisement
11

End your messages on cliffhangers.

PDF download Download Article
  1. Rather than telling him everything right away, keep a few things mysterious. He’ll be curious about the rest of your response and want to learn more about you, so he’ll ask you questions and keep the conversation alive.[11]
    • For example, you could say something like, “I had such a crazy day at work. You won’t believe what one of my coworkers did…”
    • As another example, you might say, “OMG that reminds me of something really funny I did a few months ago…”
  2. Advertisement
13

Give him time to respond.

PDF download Download Article
  1. Even though you’re probably really eager to keep chatting with this guy, he could get overwhelmed reading a wall of text from you. After sending a message, put your phone away and give him a chance to write you back. Find something to do to distract yourself while you wait so you aren’t tempted to text him again.[13]
    • Give the guy the benefit of the doubt at first if he hasn’t replied right away since he might actually be busy.
    • If your guy hasn’t responded within a week, he’s probably not interested.
  2. Advertisement
14

Make plans to get together.

PDF download Download Article
  1. While it’s nice and easy to keep up a text conversation, you won’t know if you work well together until you meet up. If you want to take the next steps in your relationship, ask if he wants to go on a date and meet up. He might be really impressed that you stepped up and took the initiative.[14]
    • For example, you might say, “I’d love to get together sometime soon! What do you have planned for this weekend?”
    • As another example, you could send, “I’ve had a lot of fun chatting 😊 Do you want to grab drinks some night this week?”

How Do You Start A Conversation On A Dating App?


Improve Your Texting Game with this Expert Series

Expert Q&A

Ask a Question
200 characters left
Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered.
Submit
Advertisement

Video

Tips

  • Take a little bit of time building up to talking about anything sexual so you’re less likely to come onto him too strong.[15]
Submit a Tip
All tip submissions are carefully reviewed before being published
Name
Please provide your name and last initial
Thanks for submitting a tip for review!
Advertisement

Warnings

  • Try to say more than “hey” as your first message to a guy since it doesn’t give him a lot to work with for continuing the conversation.[16]
Advertisement

You Might Also Like

Tinder Search Without Registering8 Effective Methods to Find a Tinder User Profile Without Signing Up
Make My Boyfriend Blush over TextMake My Boyfriend Blush over Text
Answer "Tell Me About Yourself" on a Dating AppThe 15 Best Ways to Answer "Tell Me About Yourself" on a Dating App
What Are Personality Types on TinderTinder Personality Types: 16 Myers-Briggs Interpretations
Ask a Girl for Her Number OnlineAsk a Girl for Her Number Online
See Who Liked You on BumbleSee Who Liked You on Bumble
Questions to Ask on Dating AppMeaningful and Funny Questions to Get to Know Your Dating App Match Better
Start a Conversation on HingeStart a Conversation on Hinge
Respond to "Hey" from a Girl on TinderThe 11 Best Ways to Respond to "Hey" from a Girl on Tinder
Impress a Girl on WhatsApp Impress a Girl on WhatsApp
Dating Apps for TeensA Complete List of the Best Dating Apps for Teens
Best Hinge OpenersThe 24+ Best Hinge Openers: Funny, Flirty, & Friendly
Hinge Profile Examples Make a Hinge Profile: Tips and Examples to Help You Ace Your First Impression
Get Bumble Premium for Free Get Bumble Premium for Free: Free Trial Setup & More
Advertisement

About This Article

Mark Rosenfeld
Co-authored by:
Dating & Relationship Coach
This article was co-authored by Mark Rosenfeld and by wikiHow staff writer, Hunter Rising. Mark Rosenfeld is a Dating and Relationship Coach based in Norman Park, Australia. He founded his coaching business, Make Him Yours, in 2015. Mark specializes in helping women find, attract, and keep extraordinary relationships. He has been featured in Style Magazine, Thought Catalog, Elite Daily, News.com.au, and The Good Men Project. Mark’s dating videos have received over 60 million views, and his book “Make Him Yours – Beating the Odds of Modern Dating” was a best-seller on Amazon upon its release. This article has been viewed 76,674 times.
2 votes - 100%
Co-authors: 7
Updated: September 27, 2024
Views: 76,674
Categories: Online Dating
Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 76,674 times.

Did this article help you?

Advertisement