8 Reasons Girls Hug Guys Around Their Necks (Plus How to Respond)

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Figure out whether this hug means romance or friendship

Co-authored by Imad Jbara and Devin McSween

Last Updated: December 5, 2024 Fact Checked

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Reasons Why

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Determining if the Hug is Romantic or Platonic

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Reacting to the Hug

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Expert Interview

So, you received a hug around the neck from a girl and now you’re wondering what it means. Girls like to give these hugs to guys for many reasons, like expressing their affection, comfort, and trust. Depending on your relationship, her body language, and the context of the hug, this gesture might be romantic or platonic. Follow along with us as we decode the top reasons why girls like to hug guys around their necks as well as how to determine if the hug is romantic and how to respond to it!

Things You Should Know

A girl might hug a guy around his neck to tell him that she loves and cares for him. This deeply intimate hug can also be a sign that she trusts him.
Some girls might hug a guy over his shoulders if they want to feel protected or comforted when they’re upset.
When a hug is romantic, a girl typically presses her entire body into a guy, holds the hug for several seconds, and squeezes him.

Section 1 of 3:

Reasons Why Girls Hug Guys Around Their Necks

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She loves and cares for you. Receiving a hug around the neck from a girl envelopes you with all her warmth and affection without her having to say a word. This hug simply says that she appreciates you and loves having you in her life, whether she sees you as a friend or something more.
- For instance, your friend might hug you around the neck after you win a football game to celebrate you and show you that she’s proud.
- Or, your crush might throw her arms over your shoulders and hold on tight to say she’s grateful for everything you do for her.
- You’ll know this hug means love and care because she’ll hold onto you for longer and give you a gentle squeeze.
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She trusts you. Typically, a girl only gives a hug over the shoulders to a guy who is her close friend or romantic partner. This hug is a more intimate gesture that usually involves your chests touching, so this shows you that she feels very comfortable around you. Her warm hug represents the deep bond and solid connection you share.^{[1]
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- Your friend or crush might show that she trusts you by giving you a quick squeeze or rub on the back.
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She wants to feel protected. When a girl wants to feel safe and secure in your arms, she might give you a hug around your neck. This warm hug allows her to hold onto you, which reassures her that you’re there to look after and take care of her. She might wrap her arms over your shoulders when she’s feeling upset or just wants to be close to you.^{[2]
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- This is another more intimate hug that girls typically give to close friends and significant others. She might squeeze you extra tight to show that she feels your care and protection.
- A girl might give you this hug to make you feel protected and secure, too. While there might not be a threat around, she’s telling you that she has your back through thick and thin.
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She wants to get intimate. If your crush or partner throws her arms around your neck and presses her body against yours, she might have something besides hugging on her mind. When there’s a full-body connection, this gesture takes on a sensual and romantic meaning. This hug puts her in the perfect position to give you a steamy kiss and lead to something more!^{[3]
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- Look out for other flirty cues that she wants to get close, like making eye contact, smiling, blushing, or caressing your neck.
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She wants emotional support. To some girls, nothing feels more comforting than hugging their guy friend or partner around their neck. If she’s had a bad day or is going through a tough time, she might lean into your embrace to feel your love and support. Hugging her back can encourage her to express her feelings and face whatever is bothering her.
- When you hug her, comfort your friend or crush by gently rubbing her back. Then, ask her how she’s feeling or if she wants to talk about what’s upsetting her.
- Your crush or friend might hug you over your shoulders to give you emotional support, too. A long squeeze is her way of reassuring you that things will be okay because you’ve got her by your side.
A girl wrapping her arms around your neck can be an assertive gesture that positions her over you. If you’re teasing your friend, she might give you this hug and a few back pats to playfully show you that she’s in control. Or, your crush might throw her arms around you as a flirty, suggestive signal that she wants you and isn’t scared to make the first move.
Sometimes, a girl might hug you around the neck simply because she thinks the position is more comfortable. Whether she’s taller or shorter than you, it might feel better for her to wrap her arms over your shoulders instead of around your waist or torso.^{[4]
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Like other types of hugs, a girl’s hug around the neck might just be her way of greeting you. This hug can simply be a friendly or polite gesture from your friend, crush, or significant other.^{[5]
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Section 2 of 3:

Determining if a Hug Around the Neck is Romantic or Platonic

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Examine her body language to determine if the hug is romantic. You can typically tell that a girl’s hug is romantic if she leaves no space between your bodies; if she’s interested in you, she’ll press her chest and bottom half into your body. She might squeeze you or hold onto you for several seconds to communicate that she loves hugging you and doesn’t want to let go.
- You can also tell that she’s interested in you by the warmth of the hug. If she melts into your embrace and radiates affection, it’s likely a romantic hug.
- There is typically more space between your bodies if the hug is purely friendly. Your chests might only touch, or she might simply loop 1 arm around your neck.
- Platonic hugs are also typically very quick and loose compared to the deep warmth of romantic hugs.
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Consider the context of the hug to tell if it’s romantic or not. A hug around the neck at your graduation or your loved one’s funeral might just be a girl’s way of showing her love and support for you. But, if she wraps her arms around you while you’re alone and in a more intimate setting, she might be telling you that she likes you!^{[6]
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- If you’re unsure if a girl’s hug is romantic or not, ask her how she feels about you.
- For example, say, “We’ve been hanging out a lot and I’ve been wondering if there’s something more between us. Do you have feelings for me?”

Section 3 of 3:

Reacting to a Hug Around the Neck

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Lean into the hug if you are comfortable with it. Whether you’re hugging a friend, crush, or partner, wrap your arms around their torso or waist to show your appreciation for the hug. You might give them a quick squeeze or rub on the back to tell them that you love and care for them, too.
- If you’re dating or interested in the girl you’re hugging, ask for her consent before deepening the hug romantically, like moving your hands lower or going in for a kiss.
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If you don’t want the hug, politely tell your friend or crush. If you’re not in the mood to be touched or don’t know the girl well enough yet, it can feel uncomfortable to get a hug around the neck. While it can feel awkward, gently move out of the embrace and tell her that you’d prefer to greet her with a wave, pat on the back, or some other gesture.^{[7]
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- For instance, you might say, “Sorry, I’m not a hugger!” or “I’m not much of a hugger, but I’d love to give you a high-five.”
- If you see the hug coming, dodge the hug by stepping backward and angling your body away from her.