This article was co-authored by Cher Gopman. Cher Gopman is the Founder of NYC Wingwoman LLC, a date coaching service based in New York City. 'NYC Wingwoman' offers matchmaking, wingwoman services, 1-on-1 Coaching, and intensive weekend bootcamps. Cher is a Certified Life Coach, a former psychiatric nurse, and her work has been featured on Inside Edition, Fox, ABC, VH1, and The New York Post.
This article has been fact-checked, ensuring the accuracy of any cited facts and confirming the authority of its sources.
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Give a woman a hug she will remember. The most important thing is that you channel your passion. Use the hug to show her how much you like her. When the two of you are alone and comfortable, gaze into her eyes and slowly wrap your arms around her. Let it be sweet and intimate.
Steps
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Get her alone. Create a comfortable level of privacy so that the two of you can be fully present in your intimacy. Be reasonably certain that no one is going to barge in on you, and that you won't disturb anyone else with your romantic hug. You don't want to rush this.
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Make sure you are both standing. It will be much easier to make the hug romantic if you are both already standing upright. Hug her when you are greeting or saying goodbye – during any transitional scene when you both happen to be standing. If you're going for a longer, deeper hug, then make sure that you have at least a few minutes.
- If you aren't standing, wait for a better time, or simply ask her for a hug.
- If one of you cannot stand for some reason, then you should at least be sitting next to one another without any barriers between. Sit on the ground, or on a bench, or on a bed.
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Only hug her if she's comfortable with you.[1] This perhaps goes without saying, but do not try to romantically hug a woman who is not romantically interested in you. The romantic hug is an intimate move, and it may not be well-received before she is ready.
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Start slowly. Look into her eyes. Place one arm under her armpit, in the lower half of her ribcage. Put your other hand on the general area of her shoulder blade. As the hug deepens, you can hold her waist or wrap both arms around the small of her back.[2]
- Alternately, hug her from behind. Wrap your arms around her torso or waist, and hold her tight. Let her head rest comfortably against your chest.
Gary Chapman, Relationship Counselor & Bestselling AuthorPhysical touch is a powerful way to express love in romantic relationships. When hugging your partner, move slowly, gaze into her eyes, and gently yet firmly wrap your arms around her. Channel the passion and affection you feel and let the hug communicate your deep care for this special woman.
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Channel the passion. Make it steamy. Gaze deeply and longingly into her eyes, and use the warmth of the hug to show her how you feel about her. Squeeze her tightly enough to show her that you care, but not so tightly that you hurt her at all.[3]
- Be confident. Don't hesitate to show her how you feel. It will be better for both of you if you go into the hug feeling comfortable with one another.
- Try not to be self-conscious. Focus only on the moment, and on her.
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Be slow, gentle, and firm. Pull her towards you and squeeze. Not too hard, or you'll hurt her. Slowly rub your hands up and down her back and rub your bodies together. Don't be afraid to explore with your hands, but make sure that she's into it.[4]
- If you know each other well enough, then you may be brave enough to go towards her butt. Squeeze a cheek gently but firmly, and then let go – just enough to tease her.
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Know when to let go. Don't hold on for so long that you make her uncomfortable. If you feel her start to release her grip on you: lighten up the hug.
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Escalate the situation if she's comfortable with it. If you know her really well, then gently put a leg around her and pull her close. Slowly guide her to a comfortable surface. Sit her down on your lap while slowly turning her head towards yours. Kiss her passionately while still rubbing her back with your arms, and give her a little massage. Intensify the kiss as you slowly put her underneath you.
- A romantic hug can lead to much more if the two of you are comfortable being intimate with one another. Just make sure that you're both ready.[5]
- Always ask for consent.[6] Before each move that you make to escalate the situation, ask her casually for permission. Say, for instance, "Do you mind if I take off your dress?" Try stating what you want, and giving her opportunity to say what she wants: "I want to make out on the bed. Is that something you want to do?"[7]
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Proceed respectfully. If she seems into it, then don't be afraid to keep going. If you pick up some hesitance from her, then slow down and let the hug just be a hug. Remember: it won't be romantic unless you're both into it.
Community Q&A
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QuestionCan I kiss a woman when I'm hugging her romantically?Community AnswerIt depends on the situation and the person. Don't kiss her unless you're certain you have her consent to do so.
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QuestionHow do I hug a girl in front of her parents?Hugging a girl in front of her parents may not be a good idea, as her parents may be more strict. If you do hug her in front of her parents, make it a simple hug that lasts no more than 3 seconds; otherwise, it will appear romantic.
Tips
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If you go all the way, use protection.Thanks
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Smile at her between kisses.Thanks
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Don't be afraid to express your pleasure or moan!Thanks
Warnings
- Don't say anything that will spoil the mood.Thanks
- Don't force anything. Slow down or stop if she seems uncomfortable. Get verbal consent.Thanks
- Ensure that your 'comfortable surface' is big enough. You would hate to accidentally push your girlfriend off a sofa or couch!Thanks
References
- ↑ Cher Gopman. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 17 May 2019.
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201603/7-basic-rules-hugging
- ↑ https://www.pennmedicine.org/updates/blogs/health-and-wellness/2018/february/affection
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/compassion-matters/201602/7-ways-to-become-a-more-loving-partner
- ↑ https://www.uhs.uga.edu/consent/
- ↑ Cher Gopman. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 17 May 2019.
- ↑ https://www.usf.edu/student-affairs/victim-advocacy/resources/importance-of-consent.aspx