How to Hug Your Boyfriend

Co-authored by LeTisha Underwood

Last Updated: June 26, 2024 References

A good hug is a great way to let a person know that you want to/enjoy being more than just friends. Able to speak much louder than words, hugging your boyfriend can let him know just how much he means to you and can help strengthen your relationship. In addition, hugs have proven psychological benefits.

Method 1

Method 1 of 2:

Hugging Your Boyfriend Properly

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Wear clean clothes, deodorant, and perfume if you wish. If you do decide to wear perfume, make sure that you don't overdo it.
Gently place your left hand on his lower back, right above his backside.

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Place your thumb along the side of his neck and bring your head toward his right shoulder. Rest your head on his right shoulder.
Remember not to squeeze too tight, just tight enough to make the hug more intimate.
Hug for longer if you haven't seen your boyfriend for long periods of time, your boyfriend needs comforting, or if you simply feel like a longer hug.
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Hug your boyfriend differently than you would hug your friend. Use the same steps listed above to hug a friend, but instead:
- Place your hand higher on his/her back.
- Squeeze gently, but do not press your body as close.
- Pat his/her back to make the hug more casual.
- Hold the hug for as long as it seems comfortable for both parties.
- Remember to look into his eyes and smile.^{[1]
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Know what makes a great hug. No matter who you are hugging, there are important things to remember such as:
- Always hug with both arms.
- Adjust for height differences. This can include resting your head on his chest, bending your knees, or standing on your tippy toes.
- Hug for as long as you both feel comfortable. Pay attention to body language and break the hug if you or your boyfriend seems anxious or uncomfortable.^{[2]
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- Simply enjoy being with the other person .

Method 2

Method 2 of 2:

Understanding the Physical and Psychological Benefits of Hugging

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According to a famous group of studies known as the Harlow Studies, monkeys preferred a cloth doll without food to a metal doll with food, emphasizing the need for mammals to have physical contact. Many studies have shown that babies that are held more are less stressed as adults.^{[3]
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Hugging a loved one or even a stranger releases a powerful hormone that affects the body's limbic system. Releasing oxytocin promotes feelings of contentment and belonging, while lowering blood pressure and heart rate.^{[4]
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Learn the benefits of hugging. Giving and receiving hugs have a number of psychological and physical benefits, including:
- Lower blood pressure.^{[5]
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- Reduction of stress.^{[6]
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- Feeling of belonging and euphoria.
- Increased dopamine, a hormone that stabilizes mood.
- Enhanced immune system.^{[7]
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- Sense of security.^{[8]
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