This article was co-authored by John Keegan and by wikiHow staff writer, Aly Rusciano. John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.
This article has been fact-checked, ensuring the accuracy of any cited facts and confirming the authority of its sources.
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Want to make your girlfriend laugh? Whether you’re chatting in person or via text, jokes are a great way to make her smile, impress her, and get her in the mood. From classic dad jokes to flirtatious puns and dirty innuendos, there’s a joke out there for everyone. If you’re not sure where to start, no worries! We’ve put together a list of funny, charming jokes you can text or tell your girlfriend that are sure to make her laugh.
Steps
Funny Jokes to Tell Your Girlfriend
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“What did one raspberry say to the other? I love you berry much.”[1]
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“What did the magnet say to the fridge? You’re attractive.”Advertisement
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“What did the barista say to their crush? I like you a latte.”
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“What flower is the best at kissing? Tulips.”
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“Never date an apostrophe. They’re possessive.”
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“Is your name WiFi? Because I feel a connection.”
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“What do you call insects that are dating? Answer: Love bugs.”[2]
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“How did the telephone ask its girlfriend out? It gave her a ring.”
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“What’s the most romantic ship? Courtship.”
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“Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got fine written all over you.”
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“Knock knock. Who’s there? Olive. Olive who? Olive you!”[3]
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“Knock knock. Who’s there? Kiss. Kiss who? Kiss me!”[4]
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“Knock knock. Who’s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you stunning!”
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“Knock knock. Who’s there? Cheese. Cheese who? Cheese, you're awfully cute!”[5]
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“What did the light bulb say to the switch? You turn me on!”
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“What did the calculator say to the pen? You can always count on me!”
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“What did the squirrel say to its lover? I’m nuts for you!”
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“Why did the melons get married in a church? Because they cantaloupe.”
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“Why shouldn’t you break up with a goalie? Because they’re a keeper.”[6]
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“Where do hotdogs go on a date? The meatball.”
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“Why are forks disappointed on Valentine’s Day? They just wanted to spoon.”
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“What did the two prunes call their dinner plans? A date.”
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“They say kissing is a love language. Do you want to start a conversation?”
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“You must be a banana because you’re very a-peeling.”
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“Ouch! I must have scraped my knee falling for you.”
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“Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?”
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“I’m going to arrest you for robbery because you’ve stolen my heart.”
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“If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put U and I together.”[7]
Example Jokes
Expert Q&A
Tips
References
- ↑ https://www.thepioneerwoman.com/holidays-celebrations/a35132710/valentines-day-puns/
- ↑ https://www.thepioneerwoman.com/holidays-celebrations/a35132710/valentines-day-puns/
- ↑ https://www.rd.com/article/flirty-knock-knock-jokes/
- ↑ https://www.rd.com/article/flirty-knock-knock-jokes/
- ↑ https://www.rd.com/article/flirty-knock-knock-jokes/
- ↑ https://www.thepioneerwoman.com/holidays-celebrations/a35132710/valentines-day-puns/
- ↑ https://www.thepioneerwoman.com/holidays-celebrations/a35132710/valentines-day-puns/
About This Article
Reader Success Stories
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"I used these jokes on my girlfriend and it worked like a charm. She couldn't stop laughing at the really cute ones. Thanks for making my girlfriend's birthday."..." more