This article was written by Maya Diamond, MA and by wikiHow staff writer, Danielle Blinka, MA, MPA. Maya Diamond is a Dating and Relationship Coach in Berkeley, CA. She has 15 years of experience helping singles stuck in frustrating dating patterns find internal security, heal their past, and create healthy, loving, and lasting partnerships. She received her Master's in Somatic Psychology from the California Institute of Integral Studies in 2009.
There are 7 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
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To kiss or not to kiss, that is the question. With all the conflicting dating rules circling the Internet, it’s hard to figure out if kissing on the first date is a good idea. Will your date be disappointed if you don’t pucker up? We’re here to answer all of your questions about whether or not guys expect a kiss on the first date.
This article is based on an interview with our dating and relationship coach, Maya Diamond, MA. Check out the full interview here.
Steps
How do you initiate a kiss on a first date?
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Make eye contact to get his attention. Staring into your date’s eyes shows him you like him, and it kindles passion between you.[7] If he stares deep into your eyes, he probably wants to kiss you, too.
- If he keeps avoiding your eyes, it might be best to wait for your first kiss.
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Lean in so he knows you’re interested in a kiss. After you make eye contact, angle your body toward your date.[8] Hopefully, he’ll lean toward you, so you know he’s into it.
- He might not be ready for a kiss if he pulls away. This doesn’t mean he doesn’t like you, so don’t despair. He may just need more time to get to know you.
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Touch him on his thigh or cheek to create some intimacy. Breaking the touch barrier signals to your date that you’re into him.[9] If he responds to your touch, go in for the kiss—that is, if he hasn’t already.
- Many guys like to initiate the first kiss, so he might go for it if he thinks you’re into it.
- If he pulls away from your touch, he might not be the type to kiss on the first date.
Expert Q&A
Tips
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If you’re going to go in for a kiss, freshen your breath with a mint or gum so it’ll be more pleasurable.[12]Thanks
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Don’t worry about dating rules. Just go at your own pace and everything will work out as it should.Thanks
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Everyone has their own opinions about when to share a first kiss. Check in with your date to find out how he feels.Thanks
References
- ↑ https://www.elle.com/life-love/sex-relationships/news/a26676/date-sex-etiquette-poll/
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201111/why-we-kiss-and-how-do-it-right
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/finding-love-the-scientific-take/201803/first-dates
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201111/why-we-kiss-and-how-do-it-right
- ↑ https://www.gq-magazine.co.uk/article/first-date-tips-for-men-and-women
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/mindful-dating/201908/not-feeling-initial-spark-the-first-date
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201503/loving-eye-contact-how-mutual-staring-can-create-passion
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201111/why-we-kiss-and-how-do-it-right
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201111/why-we-kiss-and-how-do-it-right