This article was co-authored by Chloe Carmichael, PhD and by wikiHow staff writer, Hannah Madden. Chloe Carmichael, PhD is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist who runs a private practice in New York City. With over 12 years of psychological consulting experience, Dr. Chloe specializes in relationship issues, stress management, self-esteem, and career coaching. She has also instructed undergraduate courses at Long Island University and has served as adjunct faculty at the City University of New York. Dr. Chloe completed her PhD in Clinical Psychology at Long Island University in Brooklyn, New York, and her clinical training at Lenox Hill Hospital and Kings County Hospital. She is accredited by the American Psychological Association and is the author of “Nervous Energy: Harness the Power of Your Anxiety” and “Dr. Chloe's 10 Commandments of Dating.”
There are 7 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
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Did you have a crush on someone who didn't like you back or did you discover that your boyfriend didn’t care about you the way you cared about him? While romantic rejection is common, it can be a painful and difficult experience to get over. Whether you had a crush on someone who didn’t like you back or you found out your boyfriend didn’t care for you, mending a broken heart can take some time. Read through these tips about getting over a guy to change your perspective and keep moving forward.
Steps
Get Over Your Crush with this Expert Series
Expert Q&A
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QuestionHow do I move on from an ex?Chloe Carmichael, PhDChloe Carmichael, PhD is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist who runs a private practice in New York City. With over 12 years of psychological consulting experience, Dr. Chloe specializes in relationship issues, stress management, self-esteem, and career coaching. She has also instructed undergraduate courses at Long Island University and has served as adjunct faculty at the City University of New York. Dr. Chloe completed her PhD in Clinical Psychology at Long Island University in Brooklyn, New York, and her clinical training at Lenox Hill Hospital and Kings County Hospital. She is accredited by the American Psychological Association and is the author of “Nervous Energy: Harness the Power of Your Anxiety” and “Dr. Chloe's 10 Commandments of Dating.”
Clinical Psychologist, Author of Dr. Chloe's 10 Commandments of DatingClinical Psychologist, Author of Dr. Chloe's 10 Commandments of DatingExpert AnswerI would recommend making a list of the top 10 problems you had in the relationship. If you're having trouble remembering anything bad, try asking a friend for help. They'll be able to give you some perspective. While it may be hard, realizing why you broke up will help you heal and move on with your life.
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Tips
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Write down your feelings in a journal or diary. This can help you get out all of your emotions and better process your feelings.Thanks
Tips from our Readers
- If you're tempted to contact him, turn off your phone for a couple of hours each day. Or, distract yourself by hanging out with your friends or doing a fun activity.
- Think about his quirks, flaws, or little things he did that annoyed you. Seeing him as a whole person can help you stop idealizing him and get over him.
- If you're religious, try praying or meditating. Praying helped me feel better and get over the guy.
Warnings
- If you are depressed and thinking about hurting yourself, seek help as soon as possible so you can feel better. You can contact the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline by calling or texting 988 if you're in the United States or Canada. If you're outside of the United States or Canada, please call your country's suicide prevention helpline for assistance.Thanks
- Avoid self-destructive behaviors such as drugs, drinking, and casual sex. These are not effective ways to get over someone, and they can cause more problems.[12]Thanks
References
- ↑ https://kidshealth.org/en/teens/broken-heart.html
- ↑ https://www.girlshealth.gov/relationships/dating/breaking_up.html
- ↑ https://www.girlshealth.gov/relationships/dating/breaking_up.html
- ↑ https://psychcentral.com/blog/10-tips-to-mend-a-broken-heart#2
- ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/grief/dealing-with-a-breakup-or-divorce.htm
- ↑ https://www.bbc.co.uk/bbcthree/article/996edc30-d6e9-480b-b4a8-15b626f0aa76
- ↑ https://www.bbc.co.uk/bbcthree/article/996edc30-d6e9-480b-b4a8-15b626f0aa76
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/i-hear-you/201804/six-psychological-strategies-getting-over-bad-breakup
- ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/grief/dealing-with-a-breakup-or-divorce.htm
About This Article
it can be hurtful to learn that a guy you liked doesn’t care about you, but by addressing your feelings, enjoying your independence, and getting support from friends, you can get over him. Write your feelings about the guy down in a private journal or simply take some time to think about them, since you won’t be able to move on until you’ve acknowledged how you feel. Try to come up with a list of positive things about yourself, like things you’ve achieved or good character traits you have, as this will help boost your self-esteem. Make time each day for activities you enjoy doing alone, like reading or taking a bath. Reach out to friends and family members to plan fun activities together, since having a good social life with those close to you will help you move on. For tips on how to stay optimistic about the future after someone has rejected you, read on!
Reader Success Stories
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"It really helped to see the different perspective of things and realize that you will get over it at some point. It might not be now, or even tomorrow but it will happen. And when it does, all the little problems and stress go away."..." more