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Question

How do I make my conversations more interesting?

Lynda Jean
Communication Consultant
Lynda Jean is an Image Consultant and the Owner of Lynda Jean Image Consulting. With over 15 years of experience, Lynda specializes in color and body/style analysis, wardrobe audits, personal shopping, social and professional etiquette, and personal and business branding. She works with clients to enhance their image, self-esteem, behavior, and communication to facilitate their social and career goals. Lynda holds Bachelor degrees in Sociology and Social Work, a Master’s degree in Clinical Social Work, and a Certified Image Consultant (CIC) certification. She studied Image Consulting at the International Image Institute and the International Academy of Fashion and Technology in Toronto, Canada. Lynda has taught Image Consulting courses at George Brown College in Toronto, Canada. She is the co-author of the book, “Business Success With Ease,” where she shares her knowledge about, ‘The Power of Professional Etiquette.’

Lynda Jean

Communication Consultant

Expert Answer

I recommend you listen more than you talk! Listen closely to what the other person is saying then ask follow-up questions to keep the conversation going.

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Question

Is there a group where I can practice my speaking skills with other people?

Paul Chernyak, LPC
Licensed Professional Counselor
Paul Chernyak is a Licensed Professional Counselor in Chicago. He graduated from the American School of Professional Psychology in 2011.

Paul Chernyak, LPC

Licensed Professional Counselor

Expert Answer

Try joining Toastmasters International. This is a group of people devoted to practicing their public speaking skills on a regular basis. Check their website to see if there is a local group in your area.

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Question

I always run out of things to say and there's this awkward silence every time. I feel like everyone I talk to gets bored with me. How can I solve this problem?

Community Answer

Prepare things beforehand. What has been on your mind lately? Another important thing is to ask about them and their opinions. It's hard for them to get bored if they have to take a big part in the conversation.

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Question

The person I would like to talk to is very quiet and shy, and is usually silent, even after I ask a question. What do I do?

Some intellectual weirdo

Community Answer

Be patient. Shy people are usually great thinkers. Maybe the person is thinking over your question and trying to form an appropriate answer. Just wait for the person to speak.

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Question

How do you join in a conversation between two or more people?

Community Answer

If you understand what they are talking about, wait until they pause, and then start talking. Keep in mind that this does not always work, and that sometimes the people may tell you to leave. The more casual the conversation is (ie: movies) the more likely this will work. The more personal the conversation is (ie: one of the person's siblings is in prison) the less likely this will work.

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Question

How do I talk to someone very special to me?

Community Answer

Endear them, speak with a smile, show excitement when speaking to them and use gentle and loving words.

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Question

I am interacting with my ex-girlfriend via phone and WhatsApp, but she feels uncomfortable and needs some more time to be normal. How to get closer to her?

Community Answer

Give her some space. It can be awkward to talk to an ex, and not everyone is equally comfortable with maintaining friendships with their exes. If she feels uncomfortable talking to you, respect that. It's only okay to try to get closer to her if she is open to it.

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Question

How do I start a conversation with a random beautiful girl I don't know?

Community Answer

Find a common situation for you, like if you're sitting behind her in a lecture, ask for a pen or something. Say thanks later on. Then gradually whenever you see her, offer her a smile. You can slowly work for the right opportunity to speak to her.

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Question

My friend and I are really awkward and shy. How can I talk to him more?

Community Answer

Know the things he is interested in and talk about them. Ask open-ended questions.

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Question

How can I start a conversation with a girl that I sit next to on the bus?

Community Answer

You can just say hello, and ask her how her day was. You can then find mutual things that you both like to talk about from there.

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Question

I work at a bank as a teller. How can I get customers to keep their conversations to under 60 seconds?

Community Answer

Try answering short simple answers to their questions and explain things briefly. Don't show them you're not interested in talking, that might hurt them, be polite and ask yes or no questions. And realize that you're contributing to a world in which human contact is becoming the rarest commodity of them all.

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Question

How do I start a conversation with my neighbour whom iIrarely talk to?

Community Answer

Start with something easy to answer. Like, if it's nice out, say something similar to, "It's been so beautiful out lately! How do you plan to enjoy this weather?" When your neighbor responds, acknowledge what they said. For example if your neighbor said s/he was planning on going camping, share an experience about camping or how you feel about camping. For example, "I love camping! My favorite part is looking at the stars when it gets dark out! What about you?" Then keep the conversation going with questions.

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Question

What do I do, as a tween, if I'm going to s a sleepover with some people I don't know?

Community Answer

Stay positive and don't appear to be nervous or having a bad time. As the night goes on, you will learn more about the other people and then hopefully you have something in common.

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Question

How do I text a special person?

Community Answer

If it is a crush make sure you can text something that he/she can answer. One thing to remember is to not flirt in all of the messages (if you don't want him/her to know you have a crush), instead add in a flirt message here and there. But, make sure to keep an average conversation!

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Question

What sort of questions can you ask a cafe worker in a store?

Community Answer

Start by asking what's his/her favorite or what he/she recommends. According to the answer, you can say that you've never tried that one/you tried that one and didn't like it/you liked it so much. Also, you can ask about the number of the customers who go there in a day/month and whether the day has already been a busy one. Or, ask if he/she's happy with the job. What's the secret of the best coffee, etc.

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Question

There's a group I want to hang out with, but I can't even have a proper conversation with them. What should I do?

Community Answer

Whoever you know best in the group, try and develop a relationship with that person, who will likely help the group accept you. When talking to the group, use the person you know best as the main person you are talking with and the other group members will join in, and you will have command. Invite the member you know best to hang out, and ask if any other friends wanna join. From there, make friends!

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Question

I really want to talk to someone but we're both shy and I can't find right topic to spark up conversation. He seems like a sullen guy. What can I do?

Masi McNall-Henriksen

Community Answer

Coming from a shy person, I would just ask the person what they are interested in. People like to talk about things they like. So try to ask questions about something you might have in common with the person.

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Question

I'm trying to learn to speak English well, but I'm having trouble. What should I do?

Community Answer

The more you practice, the more you will improve. Also, try reading books in English (even if they're children's books), watch TV and movies in English, listen to music in English, etc. If you know any fluent speakers, try to have conversations with them whenever possible. Don't get discouraged. Learning a language is difficult, but you'll get there.

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Question

I often don't have much in common with the people I want to talk to, how do I find something in common?

Community Answer

Try conversing with people you share common interests with. For example; someone wearing the jersey of a team you support or know of and let the conversation begin from there.

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Question

It's so hard for my friends and I to have good conversations without bringing up school. What else can we talk about?

Community Answer

Talk about your lives outside of school, including the movies and shows you like, music, your families or your hobbies.

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Question

I have a friend and we talk a lot online but I haven't spoken to him for years face to face. I met him for the first time today and my friends made it really awkward. We are meeting on Monday, just us, but I am worried about our conversation.

Destiel67

Community Answer

What sort of topics do you talk about online? It's easier to be more comfortable with each other if you have a connection between the almost-stranger in front of you to the friend you talk to frequently, so talk about familiar topics. If you are worried about him not liking you, don't. You can't control feelings and matters of the heart. Just be the normal, awesome self that you are when you talk to him online- there's probably lots of things you talked about when you kept in touch, maybe bring one of those topics up?

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Question

How can I talk to my teacher?

Community Answer

When talking to a teacher it all depends on the situation. Be honest with her about why you want to talk, then remind yourself she's just another person - just like you! There's no reason to be nervous.

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Question

I have been working at the same job for 8 years, but I still feel very shy. I want to overcome this and be an outspoken and confident speaker. How do I achieved this?

Community Answer

Try to focus on your fellow employees. Ask them if there is any way you can be of help, or how their day is going, etc. Look them in the eye, and really listen to what they are saying. The more you put yourself out there and interact, the more naturally it will come to you.

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Question

What do I do if me and my best friend are beginning to have nothing to talk about?

Community Answer

You two might be spending too much time together. Try to take a little break and hang out with some other friends. If you don't think this is the problem, or you don't want to do this, come up with some new, fun activities to do together that will spark conversation and make fun memories.

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Question

How do I make better conversations with my closest ones?

Community Answer

Ask them questions about themselves to bring you closer together.

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Question

How do I find a conversation topic someone normal would be interested in if I'm extremely weird and don't know much about social norms?

Community Answer

Most people like talking about themselves, so try asking what the other person's favorite thing to do in their free time is. Be interested, and ask questions, and talk about your hobbies if he/she is interested.

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Question

What are good ways to start a long conversation?

Community Answer

Try to ask questions that would initiate a long response. For example, "So, what exactly do you do at your job?" will often make the person give a long reply, and you'll have time to think of something else to say.

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Question

Sometimes my boyfriend and I don't have topics to talk about and it's awkward. What do we do?

Community Answer

Compliment him and then that might start a conversation. Ask him how his day was and always be ready if he is not in the mood to start a conversation.

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Question

I am a really reserved/shy person and I don't know how to express myself fully to someone. What do I do?

Community Answer

First, don't stress too much about this. Second, practice expanding your knowledge of who you are. You can't express yourself to someone if 1) you don't fully understand yourself, and 2) you aren't confident in who you are. Remember that you are just as important as whoever you're talking to.

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Question

How do I not run out of things to say to my girlfriend?

Community Answer

It depends on how long you've been going out. If it is a new relationship, just keep asking basic questions about her to get to know her even better. Use that information to have more in-depth conversations about current events. If you have been dating awhile, when you run out of things to say give her compliments like, "I appreciate having you so much!"

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