How to Show Your Boyfriend You Care

Co-authored by John Keegan

Last Updated: August 22, 2024 Approved

Even if you're in a loving relationship, it can sometimes be difficult to make the time and effort necessary to really show your boyfriend how much he means to you. So, if you feel you've been neglecting your man recently, you'll need to find a way to make it up to him. Luckily, there are many things you can do to let him know how much you care.

Part 1

Part 1 of 3:

Through Romantic Gestures

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1
Plan a romantic evening. One of the best ways to show your boyfriend you care is to dedicate an entire evening to love and romance.
- Have a movie night. Clean the sitting room, light some candles, and rent his favorite movie (hint: it's not The Notebook). Prepare a selection of his favorite treats - popcorn, gummy bears, nachos, whatever. Grab some pillows and a cozy blanket and get all snuggled up on the couch.
- Prepare a starlight picnic. Wait for a warm, clear night and pack a picnic for the two of you to enjoy beneath the stars. It could be wine and caviar, or beer and beef jerky - it's the thought that counts. Grab a blanket and head out to the garden, park, or roof - bring binoculars if you have them!
- 'Go all out. Scatter rose petals on the bed, wear your sexiest undies, and light a million candles. Prepare champagne and chocolate-dipped strawberries if the mood takes you. When he arrives home, call him to the bedroom in your sultriest voice, where you'll be draped sexily across the bed waiting for him. He'll take care of the rest.
- If you really want to go all out, we'll give you more ideas for special gifts and what to say to show him you care in later sections.
2
Organize a day trip. Planning a fun outing for just the two of you is a great way to show your man that you care. Try to pick a destination that he will enjoy, don't just drag him around the nearest shopping mall!
- Go to the beach: If you live near the ocean, spending a day at the beach is the perfect way to enjoy some quality time together. Go for a swim, play beach volleyball or build an enormous sandcastle. Even if it's a little chilly, you can enjoy exploring the sand dunes and breathing in the fresh sea air, all while walking hand in hand.
- Go to a gallery or museum. If your guy is the cultured type, why not take him to an art gallery or museum? Have a look online to see what exhibitions are currently running - you'd be surprised at the number of events taking place on any given day, especially in large cities. You can even buy him a macchiato afterward, just to complete the artsy experience!
- Go for a hike. Going on a hike may not seem like the most romantic of activities, but it can be a great bonding experience, especially if your guy is the outdoorsy type. As long as the hike isn't too strenuous, it'll give the two of you a great chance to talk and catch up with what's going on in each other's lives. And if you're lucky, you'll have a fantastic view once you get to the top - making it the perfect location for some romantic smooching.
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3
Cook his favorite dinner. It may seem old-fashioned, but there's more than a grain of truth to the expression "The way to a man's heart is through his belly". Aside from the delicious meal, he'll appreciate the time and effort you put into making something purely for his enjoyment.
- Think about what you're going to cook - would he prefer roast chicken and vegetables? A perfectly cooked steak? Or would he prefer something simple like mac and cheese, or spaghetti and meatballs?
- If in doubt, why not call his mother to get a few suggestions or even the exact recipes she uses? If you can learn to cook like his mom, he will love you forever!
- Turn the whole meal into an experience - set the table, and use your best crockery and silverware. Light some candles, aerate the wine, and play some laid-back music.
- If you're a terrible cook, you could also consider getting his favorite take-out. Just make sure to present it nicely - don't make him eat it from the plastic container!
Ina Garten, Television Personality & Cook

Cooking is an act of love. "Cooking is one of the great gifts you can give to those you love. It says “you’re important enough to me to spend the time and effort to cook for you."
4
Offer to give him a massage. Giving your boyfriend a romantic massage is the ideal, intimate way of showing how much you appreciate him. It will help him to relax and let go of any tension (and maybe even get him turned on).
- Prepare a calming environment to give your boyfriend his massage. Your bedroom will work just fine - just make sure to lay a towel down first to protect the covers. Dim the lights and play some soothing music.
- Ask him to remove all of his clothes (though he can leave his underpants on if he prefers) and lie face down on the bed. Start from his feet, working up his legs, along his back and shoulders, to his neck, and the top of his head. Apply firm pressure and use long, relaxing strokes. If you want more specific instructions on how to give a great massage, see here.
- Make sure to use some massage oil, as this will prevent you from pulling or pinching, and allow your hands to glide smoothly over his skin instead. You can buy a special massage oil, or simply use any sunflower or grape seed oil you might have in the kitchen.
5
Be affectionate. One of the simplest things you can do to show your boyfriend you care is to be affectionate. Both of you lead busy lives, so it's very easy to forget the importance of human contact, but getting a little touchy-feely is a great way to reignite the spark between the two of you.
- Give him a kiss before he goes to work - not just a peck on the cheek, but a full-on, open-mouthed, ten-second affair. Tell him he'll get another one when he gets home - he'll be thinking about it all day!
- Attack him with a bear hug every so often, when he least expects it. Wrap your arms around him and give him a tight squeeze. Research has shown that frequent hugs raise serotonin levels, causing people to feel calmer and happier.^{[1]
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- Hold hands when you're out and about, lean your head on his shoulder while you're watching TV, or just run your fingers through his hair when he's sitting at his desk. Don't let yourselves become the couple who sits on opposite sides of the room, not talking. Being affectionate will bring you closer.

Part 2

Part 2 of 3:

Through Gifts

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1
Buy him a fancy gadget. You don't have to spend money to show your boyfriend you care - but sometimes it doesn't hurt.
- Boys love their toys, so getting your BF the hottest new gadget on the market will definitely earn you major girlfriend points, and let him know how much you care.
- Some ideas include the hottest new iPhone, the latest PlayStation or Xbox console, a remote control helicopter, a plasma screen TV, or even a model train set (if he's into that sort of thing).^{[2]
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- If your budget doesn't extend quite that far, you can still achieve similar results with smaller gifts. Get him a new computer game, a snazzy pair of headphones, or a portable mouse for his laptop. Bonus points if it's something he mentioned needing before.
2
Make his coupons. If you're broke, or just prefer a more thoughtful gift, you can still present your boyfriend with an awesome present - a book of coupons! Not two-for-one coupons for the local supermarket of course, but homemade, personalized coupons for romantic (and not-so-romantic) services.
- Think along the lines of "this coupon entitles you to one romantic massage" or "this coupon gets you off the hook from one night of doing the dishes". You can make the coupons for domestic chores or for kinky sex acts - the choice is yours!
- Get some colored cards and fancy pens to make up the coupons. If you're feeling crafty, you can cut pictures out of magazines to stick on each coupon. We'll give you a few pointers on what to write to let him know you care in the next section.
- Alternatively, there are a range of websites available where you can choose a coupon template, fill them in as you please, and then print them off. This gives a more professional finish to your coupons!
- Your boyfriend will feel really special if you go out of your way to give him something.^{[3]
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  Expert Source
  
  John Keegan
  Dating Coach
  
  Expert Interview. 13 July 2021.}
3
Get yourself all dolled up. It's no secret that men are very visual creatures, so getting yourself all dolled up and looking pretty can be a major turn-on.
- However, what gets your man going will come down to personal preference. Some guys like girls in skimpy, flesh-revealing clothes, while others prefer the more toned-down casual look.
- The most important thing is that you don't laze around the house with unwashed hair and sweatpants on (at least not constantly). You want to show him that you take pride in your appearance and still care about looking good for him.
- Keep your hair freshly washed and looking neat, put on a nice moisturizer so your skin feels soft, wear a perfume that he likes, and wear clothes that flatter your figure and highlight your best assets.
- Don't go overboard with make-up, but a little mascara (to make your eyes pop) and some non-sticky lip balm (to increase kissability) can help you to look your best.
4
Give him an awesome experience. Rather than getting him an actual, physical gift, consider treating your BF to an amazing experience that he'll remember for the rest of his life (and secure you a nomination for Girlfriend of the Year).
- If your boy is an adrenaline junkie, think about booking him a skydive or bungee jump experience. These are pretty widely available and start from about $200. If you're feeling particularly adventurous you could sign up to go with him!
- If your guy is a car aficionado, you could consider renting a Ferrari for the day to let him drive around in. This can be a little pricey, but if it makes your man feel like James Bond for the day it's totally worth it! Look into local car rental services to see what's available in your area.
- Alternatively, you could book a trip for the two of you. Take that romantic trip to Paris that you always wanted, book a crazy weekend in Vegas, or relax for a week on a beach in Cancun. For an extra surprise, secretly clear his schedule and pack his bags, and don't tell him where you're going until you arrive at the airport!
5
Make a scrapbook. If you're more of a sentimental type, you could put together a personalized scrapbook or photo album for your man, to remind him of all the great times you've had together.
- Collect pictures from early in your relationship to the present day. Have a look at your friends' Facebook pages for any pictures you might not have seen before.
- Don't just include pictures of the two of you smiling prettily for the camera, go for the ones with the two of you laughing, acting crazy, making faces, and just generally having fun together. These are the best memories to look back on.
- You can also include any other random bits and pieces that remind you of your relationship, such as ticket stubs from the first movie you saw together, a napkin from the restaurant where you both got food poisoning or a guitar pick you caught at a recent concert.
- Use a nice pen to label each picture or keepsake, providing dates, locations, or even funny pictures. You never know - this scrapbook might be passed down to your grandchildren one day!

Part 3

Part 3 of 3:

Through Words

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1
Send playful text messages. Even when you're not together you can show your boyfriend by sending him sweet, loving, flirty, or even dirty text messages.
- This can be pretty effective when he's at work or out with his friends, as it will let him know that you're thinking about him, even when he least expects it.
- Sending a simple "I love you" or "I miss you" will really be appreciated, especially when he's expecting something more along the lines of "Don't forget to buy milk on your way home".
- Alternatively, sending something a little flirtier like "I can't wait for you to come over later so I can take off all your clothes" can get him in the mood and make him extremely impatient to see you.
- And if you really want to get him going, you could send him a picture of yourself in a sexy pose, wearing very little or nothing at all! Just make sure that he'll be alone when he opens it!
2
Give him lots of compliments. You know the way you get a warm, fuzzy feeling inside when your boyfriend tells you that you look really good or that you did a good job on something? Well, he feels the same way when you pay him a compliment, so don't forget to say something nice every now and again.
- Men also like to be complimented on their appearance so give his confidence a boost by telling him "you look really good today", "that shirt really brings out the color of your eyes" or "those jeans make your butt look really good".
- It also important to tell him when he's done a good job on something, rather than just taking it for granted. For example, if he puts effort into cooking you dinner you should tell him "Thank you so much, this looks delicious" - even if it isn't that great.
3
Write him a love letter. The love letter is something of a lost art these days, but it can still pack a hell of a romantic punch.
- There's something sweetly old-fashioned about pouring your heart and soul onto a sheet of paper. It's also more permanent and long-lasting -- a hand-written love letter cannot be accidentally deleted or assigned to junk mail.
- You can write your love letter on a beautiful piece of writing paper, or just on an old scrap - it's the words that really matter. If you're not that good at expressing how you feel, look to the work of famous writers, poets, and songwriters for inspiration.
- For a real old-school touch, put your letter in an envelope and mail it to your boyfriend. Don't tell him that he has a letter on its way - that way he'll get a wonderful surprise when it arrives.
4
Listen to him. Sometimes you don't need to say or do anything in particular - you just need to listen to your boyfriend and be there for him when he needs you most. In fact, being a good listener is an important part of any strong, healthy relationship.^{[4]
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Expert Source

John Keegan
Dating Coach

Expert Interview. 13 July 2021.}
- Sometimes guys will need a little prompt to get them talking, so try asking him how his day was or if anything interesting or exciting happened at work. Ask questions, then really listen to the answers - don't just let them go in one ear and out the other!
- Also try to take an interest in the things that interest him, whether it's his favorite sports team, a project he's currently working on or just something got to do with his family. Don't just expect him to cater to your interests all the time - it has to be reciprocal.^{[5]
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- Giving him your undivided attention really helps him feel heard.^{[6]
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  Expert Source
  
  John Keegan
  Dating Coach
  
  Expert Interview. 13 July 2021.}
5
Just tell him! If you want your boyfriend to know how much you care, just tell him! Sit him down, look him directly in the eye, and tell him that you love him.
- Let him know that you appreciate everything he does for you and that you know how lucky you are to have found a guy like him. Hopefully, he'll say it right back!
- If you want to go all out, you could tell him that he's your perfect match, that you can't imagine yourself being with anyone except him, and that you want to marry him and have beautiful babies together. Be warned that this might freak him out though.

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How do I make my boyfriend feel appreciated?

John Keegan
Dating Coach
John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.

John Keegan

Dating Coach

Expert Answer

Give them a small gift from time to time! A little chocolate or an item that reminds you of him can really help him feel special.

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Question

How do I tell my boyfriend I appreciate him?

John Keegan
Dating Coach
John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.

John Keegan

Dating Coach

Expert Answer

You can show him in the little things! For example, always keep your word, value his time, and value the commitments you make with him.

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What is the easiest way to make your boyfriend happy?

John Keegan
Dating Coach
John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.

John Keegan

Dating Coach

Expert Answer

Let him be who he truly is in front of you. Really listen to what he has to say, let him express himself in fun and silly ways, and don't try to force him to be someone that he's not.

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Tips

Always make eye contact when he talks to you.

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If you're in a long-distance relationship, try calling him frequently.

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If your boyfriend calls you cute names, such as "baby girl" or "my love", try going out of your comfort zone to call him something cute to boost his self-esteem, which can be as simple as calling him handsome.

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Tips from our Readers

The advice in this section is based on the lived experiences of wikiHow readers like you. If you have a helpful tip you’d like to share on wikiHow, please submit it in the field below.

Do something you've never done before to surprise him. For example, set a random alarm on his phone and attach a cute note to it. When it goes off, he'll see a sweet message when he least expects it.
If you have a music player or an app on your phone, try playing a slow song when you're together and ask him to dance with you.
If you’re long-distance, try Facetime dates where you order food and eat together, or read a book together.

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