This article was co-authored by John Keegan. John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.
There are 7 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
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Whether you are in a new relationship or if you are a long-term couple, everyone wants their boyfriend to be attentive and attracted to them. As relationships grow and change, it is common for the crazy passion you once had for each other to slow down or be expressed in other ways. Sure he likes you or even loves you, but there are ways to make him go crazy over you. You want him to feel desired, and you also want to encourage this passion by being a desirable partner.
Steps
Making Your Boyfriend Feel Desired
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Compliment him. Complimenting your boyfriend is an important way to help him feel appreciated and loved. By complimenting him, you will show him that you accept him as he is and that you like the things that he says and does. [1] It is important to compliment your boyfriend for his big accomplishments, but you should also try paying your boyfriend compliments when he does little things as well. For example:
- “Wow, that was an amazing kiss.”
- “You looked so sexy and manly out there cutting the grass.”
- “You were so good in the game today; it’s such a turn on watching you play.”
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Lock eyes with him. Eye contact is a great nonverbal way to show your acceptance of someone. When we like people, we are more likely to make eye contact with them. Show your boyfriend that you love and accept him by gazing into his eyes. If he returns your feelings, then he should gaze into you eyes in return.Advertisement
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Kiss with passion. Kissing is one of the ways that we evaluate our partners, so being a good kisser is really important. Kissing can also help to improve your boyfriend’s feeling of attraction and connection to you. To be a good kisser, try to keep some things in mind:[2]
- It’s okay to start off a kiss with your mouth closed and move into a more passionate kind of kiss if the mood is right.
- Make sure your teeth are clean and your breath is fresh before you attempt a kiss.
- Focus on him and nothing else when you are kissing. Being distracted while kissing can be a big turn-off.
- Try touching the back of his head or neck or stroking his arm while you kiss. These extra touches can be a great way to enhance a kiss.
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Surprise him. Nothing helps spark or reignite passion like a little spontaneity. It can help break up your normal routine and show him that you feel crazy about him, which could inspire him to go crazy over you. Be flirty and live in the moment at all times, and he will always feel excited to be around you. Some spontaneous ideas to consider:
- If your car breaks down in the rain, don’t just sit in the car waiting for him to fix it. Jump out and dance with him on the side of the road.
- If you normally watch his favorite sports team at home, surprise him with tickets or take him out to a local restaurant with huge TVs to watch the game instead.
- Take on a sexy alter ego and stay in character during your entire date.
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Encourage him. One huge part of sparking desire in your partner is helping him feel good about himself. Encourage him in his goals like you would encourage a friend. Make sure that he knows that you are there for him and that you support him.
- For example, if your boyfriend is worried about a job interview, then you can encourage him by saying something like, "You are going to be great! They would not have called you for an interview if they did not already think you were a good choice for the job!"
Being a Desirable Partner
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Show your confidence. Confidence is a really sexy quality for most people, so feel free to be your most confident when you are with your boyfriend. You can demonstrate your confidence by doing things like sharing your accomplishments and acknowledging your strengths.
- Keep in mind that some people find confidence a little intimidating. If your boyfriend has low self-confidence, then projecting your confidence may not increase his desire for you.[3]
EXPERT TIPDating CoachJohn Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.John Keegan
Dating CoachDon't worry if you're not confident yet—it'll come with practice. The more you interact with others, the more comfortable you'll become. Start small, even with a simple wave or a smile. Consistent practice will help open the door to richer connections!
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Tell him about yourself. Revealing things about yourself will help to enhance your boyfriend’s feelings for you. Tell him all about yourself, including your interests, your goals, and your family. Be careful not to reveal too much too soon, though. Keeping some aspects of your life, goals, and feelings can add mystery to your relationship, which may help to increase his interest in you.
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Pay attention to what your boyfriend is attracted to. Your boyfriend may have some specific things that attract him, so try to pay attention when he tells you that you look sexy. Perhaps your boyfriend loves lingerie, or maybe he thinks you look sexiest right after a workout. Some things that might help include:
- Wearing eye makeup. Eye makeup has been shown to make women seem more attractive to some men.[4] Try wearing some eyeliner or eyeshadow and mascara when your boyfriend is around.
- Using unscented or lightly scented products on your body. It is important for your boyfriend to be able to smell your natural scent. This scent can help him to experience strong feelings of attraction.[5] Try wearing unscented deodorant and using unscented bath products so that your boyfriend can smell your natural scent.
- Wearing red clothing now and then. One study found that men are more attracted by the color red than any other color. Get a red dress or sweater to wear on a date with your boyfriend and see what happens.
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Keep your time together light and fun. In addition to being sexy and desirable, another great way to drive your boyfriend wild is to just be a fun loving person. You want him to want to hang out with you, and showing him that you are the type of person who is up for a good time is a great hook. Don’t try to be someone you’re not, but know that there are a lot of ways to have a good time. Some ideas include:
- Go for a hike and race him to the top for the last leg. Laughing through a competitive situation will bond you and endear you to him.
- Go out to watch a sports game with him and his friends and impress them with your knowledge of the game.
- Play a game of truth or dare to show him you can be silly and fun.
Increasing His Desire
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Stay close by. Proximity has been found to increase feelings that people have for each other. In other words, the more that you see someone, the more likely you are to like that person. To make this work for you, try stopping by your boyfriend’s locker on the way to class, suggest some regular study sessions, or find ways to see more of him.
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Respect your boyfriend’s personal space and enjoy yours as well. A great way to make your boyfriend go crazy over you is to make sure that you give him a chance to miss being with you all of the time. Some of the initial spark and passion fizzle out because you get too comfortable with each other. You want him to miss you, but you also want him to know that he isn’t your sole source of happiness.
- Make plans to spend time with your girlfriends one night per week and encourage him to have a guys night.
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Mirror his movements. Mirroring someone’s movements can increase their feelings of attraction for you.[6] To make this work for you, try to copy his physical position now and then. For example, if your boyfriend readjusts himself in his seat and leans on his right hand, wait a few seconds and do the same. Make sure that you are leaning on your left hand so that you look like a mirror image of him.
- Try to be subtle about this. Mirroring often happens without people noticing they are doing it and it is important to avoid making it too obvious or it might seem strange.
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Play hard to get. Even though you are already dating, you can increase your partner’s desire for you by playing hard to get.[7] Some easy ways to play hard to get with your boyfriend include:
- Waiting 15 minutes to respond to a non-urgent text or missing a call every so often.
- Asking to reschedule if he asks for a date and you already have plans.
- Denying him a kiss now and then.
Take Your Relationship to the Next Level with this Expert Series
Expert Q&A
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QuestionHow do you make your boyfriend want you more?John KeeganJohn Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.
Dating CoachDo exciting things and share them online. Make yourself a fun person to be around by doing exciting things and then post about them on social media. Your boyfriend will want to be a part of that life. -
QuestionHow can I make my boyfriend crazy about me?John KeeganJohn Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.
Dating CoachAsk him questions about himself. Show him you’re curious about his life or his day by asking questions. You’ll make your boyfriend feel seen, which can make him crazy about you. Being a good listener also makes your boyfriend feel heard and understood. -
QuestionHow do I make my boyfriend's guy friends jealous when I'm around them?Chy_2Community AnswerThis is when you show him how much you love him, but don't change who you are. If you two are typically a quiet couple, don't go all loud and obnoxious, stay simple and subtle. Hold onto his arm or stand closer to him. Your actions should scream "He's mine!" without actually screaming it. They will see how you treat him and want a girl like you for themselves.
Video
Tips
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Only act in a way that you are comfortable with. You are not obligated in any way to do anything to or with your boyfriend that you are uncomfortable with or not ready for.Thanks
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Always be genuine and true to yourself. If you find that you have to fake your personality with your boyfriend, he might not be the most compatible. Try to find someone who goes crazy over you when you are being yourself.Thanks
References
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/having-sex-wanting-intimacy/201410/what-do-men-need-women-5-insights
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201111/why-we-kiss-and-how-do-it-right
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/maybe-its-just-me/201310/does-everyone-find-confidence-attractive
- ↑ https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1046/j.1467-2494.2003.00188.x/abstract;jsessionid=56CFE2372347EF6DBE2FD1F49E2AE01C.f01t03
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200801/scents-and-sensibility
- ↑ http://link.springer.com/article/10.1023%2FA%3A1022986608835
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201403/when-should-you-play-hard-get
About This Article
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"I find this article very helpful and best to follow. I am going to put all these into actions towards my boyfriend. I love to learn from experienced people on dating and so forth. I know with this tips it will worthwhile for me and my boyfriend."..." more